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Song Parodies -> "They Will All Be Rejoicing When You Go"

Original Song Title:

"We Will All Go Together When We Go"

Original Performer:

Tom Lehrer

Parody Song Title:

"They Will All Be Rejoicing When You Go"

Parody Written by:

Offender

The Lyrics

Based on the current reaction to New Orleans' plight, this is what I predict will happen when Iran gets finished building its nukes and sets one off in "The Great Satan." (That's us here in the United States.) Which city will be the target I can only speculate, but nearly every city in the USA is blue-stater territory, which means Iran's terrorist regime will inevitably hit a good many of its stateside supporters. No matter, though: blue-staters will always find plenty of ways to blame our President, even if he doesn't happen to be their current whipping boy Bush by then. (Nukes take a while to build, so he'll probably be out of office when they hit.)
When you cry at a funeral,
It is sad to think that sooner or
Later those you love one day will grieve for you;
And you may have thought it tragic,
--Not to mention other adjec-
Tives--to think of all the weeping they will do.

But don't you worry!

The memorials will slack off,
Every nincompoop and jack-off
Will one day act as you would not believe:
For when the bomb that flash-fries you
Fries ten million others too,
They'll be too busy cashing in to grieve!

And they will all be rejoicing when you go!
Whether you're in L.A., New York, or 'Frisco.
Telegenic bereavement,
Iran's wondrous achievement!
Yes, they all will be rejoicing when you go!

They will all be rejoicing when you go!
I mean those who happen to survive, you know.
Those whose lives have the endurance
Will collect on your insurance;
Distant kinfolk will get wealthy when you go!

Oh, they will all cheer together when you fry,
And they'll fake righteous fury bye and bye.
They will slam the Presidency
Unless he's a blue-state commie,
In that case, they'll bash the former red-state guy.

After the big maelstrom,
Blue states will learn to love the bomb...

And they will all shake their booty as you bake.
There'll be ecstatic hatred at your wake.
They'll blame some Administration
At your last incineration,
Though the body they present there might be fake.

And they will applaud together as you char;
Every anchorman, and every movie star--
Every imam and mullah
will be singing praise to Allah
Along with the trial lawyers at the bar!

Oh, they will all laugh together as you burn,
Unaware that very soon they'll get their turn:
There'll be eternal fallout
Our Lord God will cull them all out,
They'll join you in the pit; and there they'll burn!

You will all go directly to your respective Gehennas.
'Cept for maybe two percent or one percent of all yuhs....

And they will all be rejoicing when you go!
Every blue-state twit and every red RINO.
When your city goes uranious,
They will raise a cheer spontaneous!
Yes, they'll rejoice together--
They will all laugh together--
And they'll throw a massive party when you go!
Be there or be square! Me, I'll be square.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 3.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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LucidLupin LeeBee - September 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Think I'll be a triangle. I realy enjoy Lehrer & was good to read a good parody of his ;)
Agrimorfee - September 06, 2005 - Report this comment
I see your point, Offender, but too much of the OS was still stuck in there to call this an original work.

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