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Song Parodies -> "If I Only Had A Brain (Paris Hilton version)"

Original Song Title:

"If I Only Had A Brain"

Original Performer:

The Scarecrow (Wizard of Oz)

Parody Song Title:

"If I Only Had A Brain (Paris Hilton version)"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

The poor wee lass has only herself to blame for her current predicament: it may seem harsh, but she obviously thought that the law didn't apply to her... brain obviously not engaged. If there is one to engage, of course.
If I'd understood my sentence
Or even shown repentance
And not driven again
This might not have arisen
And I'd not be in prison
If I only had a brain

If I'd travelled with a chauffeur
Or sent a well-paid gofer
After all that champagne
Instead I, without thinkin'
Went a-drivin' after drinkin'
See - I said I got no brain

Now I just sit and cry
There's such a drab d├ęcor
I'm locked inside the cell I was before
So now I sit and curse the ****** law

I thought it would never happen
This steaming pile of crap on
And over me again
I would not be a goner
I could do what I wanna
If I only had a brain

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   1
 5   10

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Susanna Viljanen - June 11, 2007 - Report this comment
Spoiled little skank got what she deserved. Ms. Hilton is well on her way on becoming another Zsa Zsa Gabor.
John Barry - June 11, 2007 - Report this comment
So many parodies; such a worthy target.
Jonathan S. - June 11, 2007 - Report this comment
Too bad the schmuckette was released (mostly) and sent to her home. Big whoop. Letting her spend her "sentence" at home is like letting a demon spend eternity in heaven instead of hell. I'm beginning to think they'd let her off if she had commited mass murder. I guess there's no justice when it comes to celebrities...Oh, about your parody: 555. (Sorry if I was a little long-winded...)
Red Ant - June 11, 2007 - Report this comment
Most people who are convincted of misdemeanor crimes in LA don't serve time in jail due to overcrowding. Of course, I did write "most people". Good job here.
Ann Hammond - June 11, 2007 - Report this comment
he he
Phil Alexander - June 11, 2007 - Report this comment
Jonathan - but she's back again... after getting out, she should be shaking it all about (then doing the hokey cokey)
Jack - true, but then there's driving while drunk, driving while disqualified... then driving while disqualified *again* - if she hadn't been sent down, she'd basically have continued to ignore her punishment for the DUI, believing (erroneously, it now turns out) that the law basically doesn't apply to her
Thanks, everybody :-D
alvin - June 11, 2007 - Report this comment
love it....most accurate
Jonathan - June 12, 2007 - Report this comment
I voted you 5's and I heard that they let her go back to her house... no wait she's back in jail... no her house... jail... her house jail house jail house jail... "explodes"
McKludge - June 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Phil, don't you mean the Pokey Pokey? You put the rich blonde in, you take the rich blonde out, you put the rich blonde in, and on CNN you shout.
Wait a minute, I think there's a parody here... DIBS!
Jonathan S. - June 12, 2007 - Report this comment
McKludge, I can't BELIEVE you came up with that! (LOL) (I mean that as a compliment, BTW)
Jonathan - June 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Dang It! McKludge beat me to the punch j/k

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