Now I love my woman
Not hard to say
But she acted real funny
When I was sent far away

I’m serving my nation
Bein’ a man
Out here in this shithole
Some call “Af-ghan-i-stan”

Now my Army buddies
They played it real cool
Said, “Damn, look at this girl”
Was a Hustler covered in drool!
(Man, I felt like a fool)

It was MY honey!
My African Queen!
With some other dude
In this porn magazine
(Which was very obscene)

I ain’t laughin’ y’all
This is gone way too far
My honey’s gone turned
Into a porn star!

I threw the mag down
Mad as hell don’tcha know
But then they brought out
Some porn videos

Oh no! She’s turned pro-Ho!
Calls herself Black Velvet
Imma get leave real soon
Come home and then solve this

Gonna take my M4
Smoke some hash to unwind
Then Imma aim it at her
Blow her head off this time!
(What she done is a crime)

I’m destined for the Big House
Murder-Crime of passion
I can claim PTSD
For my homicidal action
(works to my satisfaction)!

I ain’t laughin’ y’all
This is gone way too far
My honey’s gone turned
Into a porn star!

I ain’t laughin’ y’all
This is gone way too far
My honey’s gone turned
Into a porn star!

I ain’t laughin’ y’all
This is gone way too far
My honey’s gone turned
Into a porn star!

Now she's buried
in ma backyard!