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Song Parodies -> "Thirteen Ones"

Original Song Title:

"Sixteen Tons"

Original Performer:

Tennessee Ernie Ford

Parody Song Title:

"Thirteen Ones"

Parody Written by:

Troll Survivor

The Lyrics

Some weasels make a plan that maims with a thud
This scorned clan aims with a salvo of scuds
Rubble and mud and sticks and stones
Define their critiques of some craft-packed songs

They throw thirteen ones, why should I fret
A dozen crazed ogres plus leader, I'd bet
Hate breeders don't appall me 'cause site vets know
These votes they throw are just ones to ignore

I awoke one mornin' for some fun on the site
I quipped there's some trouble as I gawked at my write
I noted thirteen ones from asinine trolls
Let the site boss say, "Hell, we've lost control"

They throw thirteen ones, why be depressed
The other eight voters indeed were impressed
Sane readers find enthralling the writes I mold
My score's so low 'cause of trumpery trolls

I would note one mornin': 'tis a chiselin' game
Righties vote double, again and again
They would raise up the shame grades with some poll rules defyin'
First thirteen one-votes tripled gave me thirty-nine

They throw thirteen ones, then take a rest
They let their prey smolder, then revote a set
TrumPeters should be outlawed and site reformed
The votes by trolls lead t' rumpled up scores

Shoulda seen it comin', meddlers wreck the site
A lotta wits didn't, a lotta wits fried
These twits seem hired by gutters of zeal
If the right's ones don't a-get you then the left's ones will

They throw thirteen ones, set after set
The muckers fake odor and deeper regret
Saint Peter knows who's brawling, and I hope so
He'll throw their souls to the region below

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 1.1
How Funny: 1.1
Overall Rating: 1.1

Total Votes: 175

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   169
 169
 169
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 5
 5
 

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