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Song Parodies -> "Nothin' for Christmas (Office Party Edition)"
Original Song Title:
"Nuttin' for Christmas"
Original Performer:
S. Tepper/R. Bennett
Parody Song Title:
"Nothin' for Christmas (Office Party Edition)"
Parody Written by:
Ingeborg S. Nordén
The Lyrics
This song is NOT autobiographical in any way; none of my old employers have held office Christmas parties, let alone one that went this horribly wrong. It's just my attempt at off-the-wall humor...*bracing myself for triple-1 votes*
Those nonstop carols in my head--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
I swear I should have stayed in bed--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
Some clown spilled eggnog on the rug,
raved about that date-rape drug,
claimed the boss had left a "bug"--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
Oh, I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
next year, they can't make me mad.
I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
these parties ain't nothin' but sad.
Some joker broke the boss's chair--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He sprayed fake snow in people's hair--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He took a leak on all the plants,
ran up the phone bill calling France
so he could gossip with his aunts--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
So, I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
next year, they can't make me mad.
I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
these parties ain't nothin' but sad.
The boss picked me for Santa Claus--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He packed the suit with first-aid gauze--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He told me "Next year, gain some weight;
you're skin and bones, don't look too great!"
By next year, I might quit...too late!
Ugh, what a b***h for me!
It better be good, next party at work--
'cause if it's not, I'll tell those jerks,
I ain't comin' for Christmas!
ugh, what a b***h for me!
I swear I should have stayed in bed--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
Some clown spilled eggnog on the rug,
raved about that date-rape drug,
claimed the boss had left a "bug"--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
Oh, I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
next year, they can't make me mad.
I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
these parties ain't nothin' but sad.
Some joker broke the boss's chair--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He sprayed fake snow in people's hair--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He took a leak on all the plants,
ran up the phone bill calling France
so he could gossip with his aunts--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
So, I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
next year, they can't make me mad.
I'm doin' nothin' for Christmas--
these parties ain't nothin' but sad.
The boss picked me for Santa Claus--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He packed the suit with first-aid gauze--
ugh, what a b***h for me!
He told me "Next year, gain some weight;
you're skin and bones, don't look too great!"
By next year, I might quit...too late!
Ugh, what a b***h for me!
It better be good, next party at work--
'cause if it's not, I'll tell those jerks,
I ain't comin' for Christmas!
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 3 | 4 | 4 | ||||||||
| 5 | 6 | 5 | 5 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
:-)
Some premature angst, have we not? :-)
you made me want to write something about Christmas now--see what you've done?
Check your keyboard...it's making stars where ITC should be..This is good humor...so you must be the good humor man....clever writing..
This would be a hum dinger if it weren't such a hum bugger. Actually I liked it much. People do get stupid at seasonal parties. Put everone on a 5 drink limit.
Thanks guys...I actually don't mind the social aspects of the holidays that much, but I've attended some pretty terrible parties (and heard some Christmas-party-from-Hades stories from friends too). All the same, my lyrics don't match any one story 100%; I just brainstormed "What are some of the worst things, short of a medical emergency, that could happen at an office Christmas party?"
So you're saying this is autobiographical, then? Heh heh. Nice job.
And when they play christmas songs before halloween then we know what Carlie Brown said about christmas being too commercial
Just found this parody. You're getting high 5's for Christmas!
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