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Song Parodies -> "There's No Kentucky Prez"

Original Song Title:

"My Old Kentucky Home"

Original Performer:

Stephen Foster

Parody Song Title:

"There's No Kentucky Prez"

Parody Written by:

Old Man Ribber

The Lyrics

Last year, I wrote several songs about U.S. Presidents for President's Day (Van Buren, Arthur, Cleveland, Eisenhower, and George H.W. Bush). This year, I'll limit my output to one song.



There's never been been a Kentucky Preisdent.
I don't think that there'll be one soon.
The Bluegrass Sate boasts no White House resident,
So Old Ribber sings a mournful tune.
Abe was born here, but he's really Illinois.
(Hawaii should not claim Big O.)
Lincoln moved away when he was a little boy.
(The Aloha State should man up, you know.)

No Kentucky POTUS,
But we'll have one some day.
For our nation lost a great opportunity
When we didn't turn to old Henry Clay.

We've had three Veeps. That's as close as we could come.
A trio who merit a look.
Richard Johnson was not one half as good as some -
Quite unlike his boss Old Kinderhook.
John Breckenridge - ran 'gainst Abe for President,
Then fought for the rebels in gray.
And Truman's Veep? Alban Barkley - what a gent -
And he coined the word "Veep" we use today.

No Kentucky POTUS.
No, not one on the roll.
And the U.S.A. won't elect a man today
From a state thast gives us booze. smokes, and coal!

Will there be soon? Might as well howl at the moon.
No hero that stands proud and tall.
No senator who can make the public swoon,
For we've only got old Mitch and Rand Paul.
Perhaps in some future age we'll be in luck.
Arriving upon Air Force One -
The U.S. Prez, bred and raised in Old Kentuck -
Hope that he or she will not bring a gun!

No Kentucky POTUS,
Not one in history.
But if we are caught in a jam I'll gladly help.
I can serve as President - 'cause I'm free.



I mean I'm available after OLR can stand on her shattered leg by herself.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Wild Child JIN - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Let me be the first to vote for you Mr. President! ;-D 555!
Old Man Ribber - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
JIN - Can you vote? The Sorprise Party is not on the ballot in many states...lol. Thanks. ;D
Old Man Ribber - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
And that may be why we're not on the ballot...the word is SURPRISE!! People with spelling disabilities have more "fnu". ;D
AFW - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Most entertaining historical chant...scoff off the few type-o's and misspells...like the weird babe, in the white background, on those Progressive Ins. tv commercials says, "That happens to me all the time."... oh, and thanks for mentioning my namesake on the seventh line from the end.
Old Man Ribber - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
AFW - You almost had me there. You, however, are far superior in "flights of fancy". ;D
Mark Scotti - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Here's to President JIM BEAM! Nobody remembers him because everytime he appeared, peoples minds went numb...LOL
Andria - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Good one... about Hawaii and Obama, Hawaii shouldn't even be a state, since it is so far away from the mainland and so culturally different (same with Alaska, I'd be happy to see a 48-star flag), and Obama is a lame excuse for a president. 5s.
Old Man Ribber - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks to you both. ;D
The Miffed Ghost of Zachary Taylor (channeled by Michael Pacholek) - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Ahem. Nice song, but we have to dock you a point: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zachary_Taylor_National_Cemetery
Old Man Ribber - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Michael - Yes, he's buried here - in Louisville. But if you check, you'll see that he was elected from Louisiana and never truly of the commonwealth. I guess those who claim the baby Lincoln will also want to claim the corpse of Old Rough and Ready! It's just a point, so slip it back to me sometime when I'm not doing so well...lol. ;D
Below Average Dave - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Well that's something I didn't know. . .I wonder if we've had a Missouri president. . .
Old Man Ribber - February 21, 2011 - Report this comment
BADave - Harry Truman. ;D

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