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Song Parodies -> "What an Oxymoron"

Original Song Title:

"Some Enchanted Evening"

Original Performer:

South Pacific

Parody Song Title:

"What an Oxymoron"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Okay...I wrote this during a dusty, sneezy baseball game. My computer's been misbehaving, so this is the first one in a while. I might have lost a knack or two. So...right. Try and find all the oxymorons, you'll have an awfully good time.
What an oxy-moron!
That graduate student
Made a new improvement on Wall Street's steel wool
Acts naturally, is awfully nice
Wears dress shirts and day dreams while eating dry ice!

What an oxy-moron,
That distant relation
His farewell reception sucked like a full vacuum
Included me out, was going nowhere
Ate my jumbo shrimp with his gold silverware!

Alone together, he's a girly man
Guest host on high ground with his healthy tan...

Not an oxy-moron
Slight exaggeration
He's the re-creation of some old boy's bridegroom
Somewhat functional, explicitly closed
Same diff'rence, he's taped live when he eats cold toast!

Oxymoron, that pretty ugly jerk:
Give him a chance - perhaps Microsoft Works!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.3
How Funny: 3.7
Overall Rating: 3.6

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   2
 4   0
 5   3

User Comments

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Leo Jay - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Very original. As usual. Microsoft Works! Classic.
John Barry - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Brilliant--especially the last line.
Johnny D - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Absolutely brilliant and extremely creative.
Arwen - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
I think you actually must have gained a knack or two...I'm not really sure what that means...but great job, Emi...=) 5s...
EmiLoca - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks to Leo Jay (I love you, man.), John Barry (um...I love you too), Johnny D (I...I guess I love you as well) and Arwen (I'd say it, but Kristof Robertson would verbally impale me on a shishkabob skewer).
Johnny D - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Awww, all right everybody, come on, GROUP HUG !!
2nz - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, great last line. Great work all around EmiLoca. Sad I missed the group hug, but still great :c)
Arwen - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Emi...don't worry about that Saucy Aussie...I'll keep him in check. Sadly, you loving me would probably turn him on. But I'm thinking about being in a fight with him anyway, so he might not care at all. Either way...he was not my first Amiright love...nor my only...I'm allowed to love as many Amiright-ians as I want...and so you can love me, too...(and how could you not?? ; )...)
Shannon V - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
What is this? A MENSA initiation assignment? "Write a song parody about a common foible of the English language... and make it funny!" Great job. You're sure to garner many 5's for this one.
Arwen - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
And I'll hug you, 2nz!!
EmiLoca - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
All right, Arwen, I love you. But not as much as Shannon, who thinks I'm being initiated into MENSA (which I'm assuming stands for the Morbidly Eccentric Nerd-Spanking Association). What an honor. And not as much as 2nz, who is male.
Johnny D - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Funny thing about love. The more you give, the more you get...the more you share, the more that's there. Hey, what's wrong with the Morbidly Eccentric Nerd-Spanking Association, anyway? Oops, never mind, I didn't say that...
Arwen - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't think anything's wrong with it, JD...I'm just wondering where I can apply for membership!
John Jenkins - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent job of making it rhyme.
Leo Jay - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Since when can you insert links into comments?
EmiLoca - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
JJ - mucho thanks-o. Other J - No clue.
Stray Pooch - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
As a former MI-type, I want to say oh THANK YOU for not working "military intelligence" into this one! lol! As to my critique, I'd like to look into your dark flashing eyes and just let the deafening silence speak wordlessly for me. This parody has given us all a great bit of pleasurable pain and enhanced our collective individuality. Congrats on a wonderfully playful work! 555!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - June 30, 2004 - Report this comment
I saw the phrase 'Saucy Aussie' on the message list and just had to come along and see what you were all saying about me. Top job, Emi! (I'll spare you any of 'my wit'.)
Kristof Robertson - June 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Frighteningly clever, yet again!! 555
Phil Alexander - June 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Great finish - "Microsoft Works" has supplanted "Military Intelligence" as the most glaring oxymoron of all time :-) ...but why is "dry ice" oxymoronic?
EmiLoca - June 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Stray Pooch, Kristof, and JARLB for the niceness. *glares at Phil* Because it rhymes with "nice".
TJC - June 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Simply astounding.... show tunes will never be safe again!
Tibbygirl, speaking in third person for some strange reason - July 01, 2004 - Report this comment
See, Tibbygirl doesn't understand why EmiLoca continues to write parodies of show tunes when she has no way of knowing the original songs, seeing as the only show tune she knows is "I Feel Pretty." But Tibbygirl thanks EmiLoca for the nice oxymoronic escape from life.
EmiLoca - July 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Don't you worry, TibbyGirl! I'm working on an "I Feel Pretty" right about now...and it's not the one from our production of The Odyssey.
Tibbygirl, still speaking in third person - July 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Tibbygirl appreciates that very much. She feels loved. Why don't you just put the Oddysey on up there anyway????? I'm sure people would be blown away. You should put one of them up there. How about "Mama"? Do "Mama." Or make a new one......ooooo I'm so chock full of ideas right now!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - February 02, 2005 - Report this comment
*plucking tape out from between my teeth* There's an idea! Emi, take off the leash and let Tibbygirl do a parody 'chock full of ideas'. I would so lurv to see that.
Stuart McArthur - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
read this ages ago emi, and for some reason didn't get to comment, but always remembered it - I've linked to it from Apricot's "cherished parodies" thread

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