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Song Parodies -> "Armored Trench Fighter New"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Armored Trench Fighter New"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

The anticipated proliferation of armored Allied airplanes naturally provoked counter-measures. Germany developed its own armored trench fighters in 1918, and tasked them with attacking Allied trench fighters and contract patrol aircraft. The first attempt at an aircraft in this class was the AEG PE (Panzer Einsitzer) triplane, which was not accepted. But its successor, the AEG DJ.1, was ordered into production. The DJ.1 was a structurally advanced two-bay biplane powered by the new 195-hp Benz Bz III or Maybach Mb IVa V-8 engine. The airframe was fabricated from dural light alloy with fabric covered flying surfaces and a dural-sheet fuselage. To reduce vulnerability to ground fire, there were no bracing wires. The wings were braced to each other and to the fuselage by substantial, I-section struts. Armor protected the pilot, fuel tanks, and engine. Initially, the fighter was to carry two standard 7.92-mm machine guns and light bombs. But it was also designed to incorporate the formidable TuF (Tank und Flieger Gewehr), a heavy antitank machine gun chambered for the 13-mm Mauser cartridge. Three prototypes were under test when the war ended in the West. The Benz-engined aircraft attained a maximum speed of 112 mph. They weighed 2606 lbs empy and 3,031 lbs fully loaded. Span was 32 ft 9 in and length was 21 ft 11 in.
Armored trench fighter new
‘18 biplane

Contact with Allied tanks was true
Allies were drivin’
AEG replyin’

Germans couldn’t stand it
Tanks takin’ ground
DJ-1 would prove deadly
Attack plane would be hard to shoot down

Armored trench fighter new
‘18 biplane
Droppin’ mines

They built few
They built few
They built few
Before WW1 ended
Braced with I-beams
13mm TuF MG
195 hp Mercedes engine

Built only three
Armored trench fighter new
‘18 biplane
(112 mph max. speed)
http://worldatwar.net/chandelle/v2/v2n1/aeg_dj1.gif http://flyingmachines.ru/Images7/Putnam/German/240-1.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
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User Comments

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David Copper - September 16, 2011 - Report this comment
We're both sides already bombing the trenches with hand-drops of small bombs and grenades?
Rob Arndt - September 17, 2011 - Report this comment
By 1918, Germany had dedicated attack aircraft from Junkers, Dornier, and AEG. The Germans were moving on to all-metal monoplane types with normal bombs attached to the underbelly or wings.
Phil Alexander - September 17, 2011 - Report this comment
some early fighters attached puny 2-3 kg bpmbs to their fuselages on wooden racks and then would pull a release pin to drop them on enemy trenches. They were not effective and hence led to armored trench fighters. Britain was building the Barkhound for such a purpose, but it got cancelled.
Phil Alexander - September 19, 2011 - Report this comment
How very odd.. looks like there's another of me around, 'cause I certainly didn't leave that comment - no knowledge of this kind of thing, either. Hi, Phil :-)
Patrick - September 19, 2011 - Report this comment
I remember the single shot bolt action 13mm rifle. Got to hold one once. Heavy! Didn't know the Germans had an aircraft machinegun in that caliber then. That would have been one formidable weapon against fabric covered planes. Ever hear of any successes with flechettes?

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