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Song Parodies -> "The SS Haunebu"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"The SS Haunebu"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Since this is both controversial and speculative, it is only provisional. The SS E-IV (Entwicklungsstelle 4), a development unit of the SS occult “Order of the Black Sun” was tasked with researching alternative energies to make the Third Reich independent of scarce fuel oil for war production. Their work included developing alternative energies and fuel sources through coal gasification, research into grain alcohol fuels, less complicated coal burning engines for vehicles and generators, as well as highly advanced liquid oxygen turbines, total reaction turbines, AIP (Air Independent Propulsion) motors and even EMG (Electro-Magnetic-Gravitic) engines. This group developed by 1939 a revolutionary electro-magnetic-gravitic engine which improved Hans Coler’s free energy machine into an energy Konverter coupled to a Van De Graaf band generator and Marconi vortex dynamo (a spherical tank of mercury) to create powerful rotating electromagnetic fields that affected gravity and reduced mass. It was designated the Thule Triebwerk (Thrustwork, a.ka. Tachyonator-7 drive) and was to be installed into a Thule designed disc. Since 1935 Thule had been scouting for a remote, inconspicuous, underdeveloped testing ground for such a craft. Thule found a location in Northwest Germany that was known as (or possibly designated as) Hauneburg. At the establishment of this testing ground and facilities the SS E-IV unit simply referred to the new Thule disc as a product - the "H-Gerät" (Hauneburg Device). For wartime security reasons the name was shortened to Haunebu in 1939 and briefly designated RFZ-5 along with Vril‘s machines. At a much later time in the war as production of these craft was to commence the Hauneburg site was abandoned in favor of the more suitable Vril Arado Brandenburg aircraft testing grounds. Although designated as part of the RFZ series the Haunebu disc was actually a separate Thule product constructed with the help of the SS E-IV unit while the RFZ series were primarily built at Arado Brandenburg under Vril direction up to the RFZ-4 disc. The early Haunebu I craft of which two prototypes were constructed were 25 meters in diameter, had a crew of eight and could achieve the incredible initial velocity of 4,800 km/h, but at low altitude. Further enhancement enabled the machine to reach 17,000 km/h! Flight endurance was 18 hours. To resist the incredible temperatures of these velocities a special armor called Victalen was pioneered by SS metallurgists specifically for both the Haunebu and Vril series of disc craft. The Haunebu I had a double hull of Victalen. The early models also attempted to test out a rather large experimental gun installation - the twin 60mm KraftStrahlKanone (KSK) which operated off the Triebwerk for power. It has been suggested that the ray from this weapon made it a laser, but it was not. When a Vril 7 was downed by the Russians in 1945 a similar underbelly mounted KSK gun was destroyed with debris recovered from the battle site. Postwar the strange metal balls and tungsten spirals that made up the weapon could not be identified. But recently it has been speculated that the Triebwerk-connected balls formed cascade oscillators that were connected to a long barrel-shrouded transmission rod wrapped in a precision tungsten spiral, or coil to transmit a powerful energy burst suitable to pierce up to 4” of enemy armor! The heavy gun installation, however, badly destabilized the disc and in subsequent Haunebu models lighter MG and MK cannon were supposedly installed (although it is not apparent from any photographic source, being an internal installation of six MK-108s in an upper and lower triple gun pack). The Haunebu I first flew in 1939 and both prototypes made 52 test flights. In 1942, the enlarged Haunebu II of 26 meters diameter was ready for flight testing. This disc had a crew of nine and could also achieve supersonic flight of between 6,000-21,000 km/h with a flight endurance of 55 hours. Both it and the further developed 32 meter diameter Do-Stra had heat shielding of two hulls of Victalen. Seven of these craft were constructed and tested between 1943-44. The craft made 106 test flights. By 1944, the perfected war model, the Haunebu II Do-Stra (Dornier STRAtosphären Flugzeug) was tested. Two prototypes were built. These massive machines, several stories tall, were crewed by 20 men. They were also capable of hypersonic speed beyond 21,000 km/h. The SS had intended to produce the machines with tenders for both Junkers and Dornier but in late 1944/early 1945 Dornier was chosen. The close of the war, however, prevented Dornier from building any production models.Yet larger still was the 71 meter diameter Haunebu III. A lone prototype was constructed before the close of the war. It was crewed by 32 and could achieve speeds of between 7,000- 40,000 km/h! It had a triple Victalen hull. It is said to have had a flight endurance of between 7-8 weeks! The craft made 19 test flights. This craft was to be used for evacuation work for Thule and Vril in March 1945. Named Ostara, after the old Germanic goddess of the East, dawn, rebirth, and resurrection, the overloaded Haunebu III may have been boostered by a cluster of A-9/A-10 rockets to get it into the air with SS General Hans Kammler onboard.
The SS Haunebu
since 1939

Nazis built disc aircraft in WW2
Built for spyin’
Radical EMG flyin’

Fixed ferrite ring, electromagnets
Dynamo spinnin’ around
Magnetic field shifting in flight
KT-P2 celestial navigation set on the ground

The SS Haunebu
since 1939
Raumjaeger EINS

How it flew
How it flew
How it flew
Allies didn’t have a clue
March 1945 departure
Flew in total secrecy
Base 211? Nobody knew…
(except Kammler)

Defied gravity
The SS Haunebu
since 1939
(reverse-engineered in Area 51 laboratory)



http://physiclove.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/haunebu_1.jpg http://greyfalcon.us/picturesz/hu2.jpg http://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/imagenes_tierrahueca/I_Haunebu2-07.jpg http://www.eyepod.org/images/I_Haunebu-komp02_1_.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 5   5
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Wild Child JIN - June 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Wow! looks like a UFO, if someone can identify it let me know! ;-D Excellent Rob! 5's! :-)
Hammerhead - June 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Are the Nazi discs really true or just hype??? What gives???
Patrick - June 16, 2011 - Report this comment
If the Nazis had these machines, why didn't they attack New York and/or Washington with them?
Rob Arndt - September 13, 2011 - Report this comment
These machines were prototypes only and below the control tower the main body had to use all the space for the battery and propulsion system. No armamnet could be carried internally and what you're talking about is a bombing run with at least 4-5 tons of bombs. No way for external armament- the KSK gun destabilized the disc badly and was removed. Even dogfights were near impossible with the strange angles that the discs had to chnage flight with using MFS. Their bulk and speed would also have made it hard to come up with tactics to hit Spits and Stangs flying a mere 400 mph!!! The Nazis wanted them for transport and recon, the transport of human beings, not cargo.

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