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Song Parodies -> "Seehund Out to Sink You"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Seehund Out to Sink You"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

After the disaster of the poorly constructed and performing Biber German midget sub, the next endeavor was the excellent Seehund (Sea Hound) which was 15 tons, 39 ft long, and was powered by a 60 hp Bussing motor to a speed of 9 mph. Was armed with 2x 533mm torpedos. It was difficult to spot and did not appear on radar. When attacked by depth charges it rolled with the waves and survived most of the time. Construction was by prefabrication and then trucked to the assembly area and sheltered in hardened bunkers immune to bombing. Almost 300 of them were built for 1945 with another 200 under construction. They operated in the Straight of Dover and N Sea in small groups of no more than 30 at one time. Losses in just 15 weeks of operation was 10% and yet they caused the British to deploy 500 escorts and 1000 aircraft to fight these small groups and attack their fortified bunkers! The Seehunden sunk 40,000 tons in a short time, although the British only reported 19,000 tons with an additional 19,000 tons damaged. The German historian claims 120,000 tons which is just too high. Most good sources claim anywhere from 20-60,000 tons. So 40,000 is in the middle. The Free French frigate Le Combattante was lost on Feb 23, 1945 after being hit by a single torp from a Seehund. Most Seehunden were dropped by S-boots. After the war the British studied the Seehund intensely. They were captured at Kiel, Elbing, and Ulm.
Seehund out to sink you
they scored 9

The midget sub came as bad news
In Straight lyin’
Two torps for firin’

British couldn’t stand it
They could not be found
500 escorts handy
1000 aircraft were bunker bound

[None were lost in shielded compounds]

Seehund out to sink you
And they scored 9
In ‘45

Manned by two
9 (mph) it moved
In range- screwed
Fired at 850 yards
Hit here and there
In just fifteen weeks
And it fought hard

[Lots of tons scored]

(Small) Victory!
Seehund out to sink you
And they scored 9
(Never more than 30 at sea)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 3
 
 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   14
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - January 24, 2014 - Report this comment
Was that a Justin Biber midget German midget sub?
Rob Arndt - January 25, 2014 - Report this comment
No, the Justin Bieber midget would have sunk itself!!!
Craig Wheeler - January 25, 2014 - Report this comment
Informative. I know that the British, Italians, Japanese, and Germans had midget submarines, but did the United States? And who had the most types? Japanese?
Rob Arndt - January 25, 2014 - Report this comment
The US and USSR did not develop midget subs. The USN had a private company in Va. design a 15 ton "Deep Dog", but had many difficulties with her. She was lengthened and strengthened- up to 18 tons with more advanced equipment and was renamed "Depth Devil." It was planned to attach a "Starfish" magnetic warhead to the nose, but the US Navy rejected the design outright as proposed. It was then scrapped. Further advanced models were tank-tested, but abandoned. No requirement. The Germans had the most types with Hecht, Biber, Molch, Seehund and Neger/Marder (although those were more of manned torpedos). 1500+ built of all types. Prototypes were also numerous with Hai, Delphin I & II, Schwertal and Seeteufel. Designs for the Manta and a DSRV too.
Kaleenka - January 27, 2014 - Report this comment
Here, Tristan, some lyrics more to your liking ........... Ratsvetali yabloni ee grooshiy; Popliliy tumaniy had rekoy; Vihodili na beryeg Katyusha; Ha visokiy beryeg ha krootoy
Kaleenka - January 27, 2014 - Report this comment
Oops, did I say "tumaniy had rekoy" It should be "tumaniy NA rekoy" .... and "beryeg NA krootoy" My bad. Sorry I spoiled your favorite song, Tristan ....... or is it ISOLDE (lol)

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