Small error in text. Parabellum rd velocity is 1300 fps, not 1300 fpm!!! The Glisenti M1910:
http://picturearchive.gunauction.com/8732212850/9079541/692d56d1a82a565230be91569559af5d.jpg

I once had a muzzleloading pistol that must have shot a .44 ball at 1300 feet per minute. I have actually held a Glisenti and sold it for the auction company where I was employed. Very rare gun, don't remember whether it was even in working order. Did issue the standard "No Parabellum" warning in the online description. Never really trusted any autoloading pistol that didn't follow the basic Browning design. You don't see many of the interesting older guns at local shows anymore. Big regret: many years ago I had the chance to buy a Schwarzlose blow-forward 7.65mm at a Topeka show for $95! In those days I actually had $95. Would have been worth that just for the experience of the reportedly weird recoil sensation. Have you ever handled a Fiala manually operated .22? In terms of materials and workmanship, the worst handgun I have seen is the Clerke First .22 or .32 revolver. The Serrafile Terrier, a rebranded Clerke was even sloppier. I have worked on a lot of those. The Argentinian Doberman revolvers have a similar reputation, but I doubt there are any in the United States. The Indian Ordnance Factory IOF .32 revolver is said to be rather crude and unreliable. A reduced caliber copy of the old British Webley, it retails for about $2000 in India. There are the usual bribes and favor trading to get the purchase and transport permits. Then you book your pistol with the factory. When it is finally ready, you have to travel to the city where the factory is located, get a bank deposit ticket and take it to a government office. This has to be done before noon. Then you have to spend the night, because the factory opens in the morning, and all that day's purchasers are required to be at the factory, then wait throughout the day as their guns are delivered. After that, you are not allowed to sell the gun for five years. Even though the revolver is considered to be of mediocre quality, the average user is only allowed to possess 10 rounds of ammunition at a time, or 25 for the year, so few IOF .32's are worn out from firing.

You cannot open the comment box for one person only. That is not only anti-collegial, but it violates the intent of the site. You have a choice to receive or not to receive comments. That's all. If you wish to correspond privately, do so by e-mail and avoid insulting other readers, especially those who just may have something to offer regarding the topic

LO, nope, I can pretty much do want I want with each parody due to the comment box checked or unchecked option. I CHOSE to open this one to Patrick and anyone else that can stay On-topic. You did not... but IF you have anything to add or comment about regarding this firearm or others- feel free. @Patrick, I'm impressed by your firsthand knowledge of collector's arms (historical). In that area, your experience is greater than mine and your knowledge base is greater. I dominate in overall weapon systems of all types and specialize as you know in German arms of all time periods, but love the Reich weapons. Some of the weapons I would like to see, own, or fire include the WW1 20mm Becker and rare Erhardt cannons, the Gast gun, and artillery Luger plus a TuF gun. Inter-war MP-28 would be a blast and although I've handled a postwar Walther MP-L, I could not own it. I am forever obsessed with the missing Sauer prototype Amboss and wonder what happened to the Walther Volkspistole? There were other prototype VG assault rifles by a range of manufacturers in the chaos of 1945 too. Most of the old pistols I've seen or fired, you already know: Mannlicher, Roth Steyr, old CZs, Bergmann-Bayard, MAS M35, Schwarzlose M1898, Dreyse Army 9, old Walthers, old Webleys & Webley Scott Mk.1, a few Frommers, Nambu and Baby Nambu, an Obregon .45, an old Astra, Tokarevs, various 1911s, and Smith & Wessons plus other oddballs from Intel connections, military connections, collectors, and Class dealers. I started shooting in 1971 with my dad and so the guns were US for pistol and long barrel. My modern collections tended to be foreign and up to date HK, Walther, Beretta, Glock, SIG, IMI, and Taurus for pistols (not counting the old US wheel guns)! I just am attracted to odd or rare weapons of all types. I post on these older guns for fun and your replies also give me a wealth of information too! Thanks Patrick. Please note that even though I prefer German arms, I would give almost anything for a AN-94 assault rifle and GSh-18 pistol! For survival, I don't think anyone can ever beat Russian AK 7.62x39mm... which was of course derived from the STG-44's 7.92x33 Kurz round and gun architecture) :)

Mr. Arndt, you cannot change the first sentence you wrote in your preface: "This one open for Patrick as will be all firearms parodies." I damn well stayed on topic. Why single out Patrick? Of course, you have enabled him (and everybody else) to comment, but any alert reader will know that you want and expect only your fellow gun hobbyist Patrick to reply. "Got something to say? Leave a comment!" Those are the onsite instructions. Please don't favor, or even mention, a particular individual as being invited to comment.

You and Patrick are the ones who have not stayed on topic: the Glisenti. By far, most of Patrick's reply and your reply to him deal with other firearms, personal experience with them, etc. Do you think a long discussion of the red tape involved in purchasing the Indian Ordnance Factory IOF .32 revolver is anything more than lengthy schmoozing and the wasting of space by two hobbyists who seem to consider this site their private domain?

And nowhere -- nowhere -- is the quality of the parody discussed. This is a parody site, not an antique gun chat group. I'm sure you can find an appropriate venue to dominate.

Rob, you apparently think you own this site and can inundate it with endless, arcane data that only weapons fans can endure. And when your thread is used to criticize your modus operandi, you dismiss it as irrelevant to the topic you inflicted on us and bloviated about in your preface essay. We can't win, can we!

@LO, you read this one wrong. Open to Patrick (sure, it was aimed at him) AS WILL BE ALL FIREARM PARODIES (which is NOT exclusive to Patrick). Just b/c a comma was not used after Patrick doesn't mean all firearms parodies are for him alone. Others have left comments on these same _open_ parodies with some individual input. I wrote about the Glisenti pistol and so what if there is thread drift? That applies to all AiR parodies, so get over it. I can't help that you have nothing to contribute regarding firearms of any kind- that's _your_ problem, pal. @Bill Arm, I have written almost 2200 parodies at record pace and your broad generalization is unfounded and refuted by my author page that has a supremely wide range of topics; in fact, you got it wrong for this week alone. I have written about (in the order that I wrote them): General George Washington's visions recorded in the LOC, Panther tanks equipped with IR gear, Psy's mental acts from his own MV, fictional heroine Aeon Flux with Trevor Goodchild, the Challenger disaster of 1986, and this parody about a bad pistol- the Glisenti M1910. I write whatever comes to mind and much of that has nothing to do with weapons. This week so far I have 2 parodies with weapons out of 6 or 1/3rd and this will decrease as I have another written already about the 111 ratings here. I also have the honor of being the only author here that has written so much about so many diverse topics that others would not or could not touch. If not for me and my knowledge base, the bulk of the almost 2200 parodies with their unusual topics would not exist. In fact, you can go through my range of diverse topics and read all the early comments on my IQ and how I know so much about so many things (written by parodists like JAB, OMR, WCJ, PP, and others). Try JAB's and my own parody of a parody series 1 & 2 and look at the topics. We wrote together 51 such PoPs from only 2 original songs!!! I write about many unknown or little-known things historically and they aren't all about weapons!!! All this banter LO and you have created is a violation of the rules b/c you are trying to turn this comment box into a NG-style open forum for which it is not intended. At least Patrick and I stayed On-Topic with historical firearms of which the Glisenti M1910 is a part. I responded with some of my own historical arms and mixed in some modern. So what? And I don't own this site, I only participate here everyday with parodies, Fragments, and other contributions. All you and LO are doing is providing negative commentary. You both should spend that time writing more parodies instead of looking for ways to criticize me personally to no effect ;-)

Hey Patrick, Left Overs thinks that you and I have a private domain here at AiR!!! I can only wonder WHY these type of people continue to visit my parody pages when they claim my parodies have no merit compared to theirs! No one is arm-twisting them to click, but one thing is certain- they DO enjoy typing a lot of commentary, usually under false S/Ns. What valor! In that regard, I guess I really DO dominate them by forcing them to start a NG-style forum in my comment boxes when open! I am in effect wasting their lives effortlessly!!! Now THAT is humorous :)~

The last laugh is on you, Mr. Arndt. You waste your life defending yourself with litanies of numbers every time a sock puppet criticizes you. While accessing "Latest Comments," I happened upon the windy private exchange between you and Patrick, and I investigated further. I wouldn't read your "parodies" voluntarily for all the schnitzel in Germany. Now I see that you're abusing the site by tossing love letters over the transom to your pal. By the way, I caught you and Patrick using aliases recently. You didn't have the I.Q. to disguise your familiar writing styles. Pathetic.

No, LO(W) it's not b/c you once again have to get the last word in and have wasted all day making comments here. As for occasional use of obvious aliases like Patriot, Anonymous, On Looker, or others- so what? Nothing special, especially with political parodies and the hateful remarks others make here under all sorts of names. Sometimes it is better to play the game with them than give them a reason to post even more garbage on my threads. Btw, haven't you learned the lesson that deception is the greatest weapon of war? You are practicing it right now with your continued use of Left Out. So I am free to equally describe my displeasure under another harmless alias. And my deliberate attempts are designed to be recognized (I think enough people know my humor and style by now, don'tcha think?). If I'm pathetic what does that make you when you keep returning and failing to make any impression on me at all? And stop using Patrick as an excuse. He writes periodically and not much about weapons. Rather, he usually comments on the weapons parodies that I post. I see no proof of him conspiring to "dominate" this site with me- that's just asinine. I post everyday and that's my MO- period. I just hope that tomorrow you have as many parodies posted as comments here... but no, there won't be. That makes you pathetic. NFR...

You who condemn false S/Ns now justify the practice under my pressure. You have revealed yourself as a hypocrite and phony. And I'm making an impression on you, all right. I'm keeping you glued to your computer all night. You cannot defeat me in a battle of wits and logic and parodic skill. You lose. Patrick the reactionary is just your foil. You cannot help but make a fool of yourself and render my job easy. You have no idea who you're up against. Go to sleep.

LO, the generic aliases Patriot, Anon- Anonymous, and On Looker have been used by a multitude of people long before I even got here and will still be used when I leave. It is not hypocritical to use them, esp. with political parodies. Parodists that use their own S/Ns or real names get counter-attacked real quick by the opposing party members. So, it's just safer. And sometimes they are used by people that actually like a particular author, but disagree with one of their views and don't want to start a 1-bomb war or hurt their feelings. I would say that the former is a better solution than the latter. There is a big difference between those and aliases like one-named haters that either want to use obscenities or make very personal attacks rather than just silent 1-bomb (like so many others do). And what have made no impression on me? You are just another worthless commentator that stayed up all day to read and re-read my remarks and Patrick's. I was never glued to my PC. I wrote 3 parodies instead of one at different times and there is a time difference between my state (Cali, PST) and the site's (C/MT or EST). It was not yet Wed when I posted and I stay up late anyway as do others. All you are making are further broad generalizations and trying to perpetuate false accusations that are refuted by my author page and history here. And who am I up against IMHO? A nobody of any consequence. Now run along before I switch from verbal 88mm Kwk 43 L/71 to 128mm PAK 44 (which is a another weapons ref). Btw, I do not see any of your parodies here today... but then again, you post as a coward who is Left Out b/c you have nothing to contribute to this topic which is the Glisenti M1910. At least Patrick did and only added a range of other historical pistols that I found fascinating. If you didn't- that's your problem. Do I really have to repeat myself? Are you a child?

@ Left Out: You encouraged me to check out the AFW oeuvre, but there's so much that I landed on a few which are several years old, like Cockeyed Optometrist and Zing Went the Strings of Her Part. He's zany, creative and very funny. I'll have to check out his upcoming parodies more carefully. Rob apparently has the sense of humor and the tolerance of different opinions as did Josef Goebbels. But aren't we aggravating the old boy by getting off-topic, which is the thrillingly hilarious Italian Glisenti M1910? I'll fix that: "Hey, goombah, dat Glisenti M1910 -- it's-a shiny but she's-a blow up-a in you face."

Which pseudonyms did I use? I am flattered that someone here thinks I have a "style" that can be recognized. I like political material and always welcome comments. I don't usually write about particular weapons, because I just don't have a knack for making songs about them, and I realize that most readers here are not particularly interested. I can, and have written about the subject of gun control and individual obsession with guns. A song about Obama staying up all night plotting to take away Elmer Fudd's shotgun, or Fudd burying his gun to save it from Obama could have general appeal. A technical appraisal of the rare Smith & Wesson .35 caliber is just not something I personally could turn into a parody, and would not reach most of the AIR fan base. When I first came to AIR, there was a fellow named William Tong who wrote some 3000 parodies, almost all attacks on then President Bush. He disabled, or I was told, asked to disable the comment box, for fear of filling up the available band width or whatever it is called, with political commentary. I have always read Rob as a source of information, and I learned a lot from his writings.

Thanks Patrick, and don't mind LO(SER). The guy is being hypocritical himself in taking such a strong stand against generic over-used false S/Ns and yet is still posting under his!!! He mentions some sort of hate campaign against AFW over some argument- WHAT argument? I rarely comment on AFW's parodies but have left plenty of 555s for him during the 2.5 years I've been here; in fact, he was the first parodist that I parodied in 2011! I have nothing against him personally and fully recognize that we are diametrically opposed on most issues, esp. politics b/c he is left-wing DEM and I am right-wing REP. There is also some unspoken resentment concerning my Reich parodies but I expect that from all Greatest Generation seniors or those that served in the USAAF. They never want to hear about superiority of German arms and the same formula of superior materials and manpower that the US contributed to help win both WWs... even though the US came in last both times. In WW2 the US was the Arsenal of Democracy with lend-lease to Britain and Russia and carried the higher load of bombs during the Daylight Air Offensive, but Britain led in radar, Allied jet tech, enigma decifering, commando ops, recovery of V-1 and V-2 tech, and fought Germany alone in 1940. Had Britain fallen the US most likely would have kept trading with Germany as various Corps in the US violated the trading with the enemy act: ITT, IBM, Alcoa, National Steel, Ford, Chase, DuPont, and others. The first German Amerika Bomber got its first target list supplied from the US!!! Germans used IBM Hollerith tabulators for the Holocaust too! Americans don't want to hear such things or even domestic conspiracies like Hearst and DuPont sabotaging Ford's chemurgian tech b/c it used hemp. Ford built a 1942 Hempmobile that had a lighter body with panels 12x the strength of steel. He would publicly take an axe to the car to show its resistance to damage and he planned to submit drawings for a chemugian bomber called either the Green Arrow or simply the Arrow which could take more punishment than both the B-17 and 24. DuPont's chemical industry supplied plastic tech and the B-26 had over 400 plastic parts. Hearst smeared Ford in the papers and his car was not available to the public and died in obscurity. His bomber also was never considered, even thought the US Govt used hemp in all of its armed forces for parachute rigging, naval ropes, fire-fighting hoses, synthetic lubricants, and so on... America also ripped off the lion's share of German tech including German pre-war civil patents and then resold many of the non-military tech to Europe and even the enemy USSR!!! These are undisputed facts. Anyway, I am continually 1-bombed based on my submitting alone and not about the parodies for style or lyrics, topic, whatever... and yet people like LO have absolutely failed to stop me reaching objectives and continuing to provide useful information to those that appreciate it. I ask again- hey Lo, where are YOUR parodies for comparison? And when will you stop harassing Patrick and myself? And trying to start a fight between me and AFW is trolling and you will be reported as that is unsubstantiated.

An account of your putative attacks against AFW was written by @ Left Out, not me, and are to be found in this thread. So DO NOT threaten me based on your failure to read accurately.

My parodies, the best ever written for this now woebegone site are, of course, not ascribed to "Left Out."

By the way, your World War II comrades are fortunate to have unconditionally surrendered to the Allies in April 1945, else our Yankee ingenuity might have been visited upon Berlin, rather than Hiroshima four months later. Uranium trumps hemp.

If Patrick has a distinctive style, or a distinctive element in his parodies, it would be an incredible talent for smushing -- where you imagine one song being performed by another performer, using a song by that performer. He was the best at the "Edmund FitzGerald" smooshes. And I don't recall any aliases used in any of these efforts .... And speaking of which, LO, if you were that good at parodies, why don't you use that talent to help revive this website. If this site goes completely kaput, we'll all lose an incredible amount of work to the cyber-ether.

CML, LO is just a worthless commentator. If he/she is the best parodist ever then by all means he/she should prove it, unless implying that he is JAB!!! Also, this person's historical ignorance shows with the WW2 remarks. Germany surrendered on May 8, 1945 and the last kills in the air and at sea were made by the Germans. The Germans, of course, still held on to Denmark, Norway, the Channel Islands, and several pockets in the USSR as well as territory in Austria and S Germany itself which took time to surrender and process. As for the B-29 operating in the ETO- no. It lacked sufficient height at 32,000 ft to evade the Fw-190, Bf 109, Me-262, and night fighters. That large tail and those large Wright Cyclones would have been easy targets for MK-108s, MK-103s, and MG-151/20s & 30s, not to mention the new Mauser MK-213 revolver cannon and X-4 missiles. Climatic conditions were also bad for that Norden bombsight which btw was inferior to the Lotfe 7K as admitted by US technical documents. And Berlin unlike Hiroshima and Nagasaki was not made largely of combustable wood. There were over 1000 bunkers in Berlin and most would have withstood the blast not to mention Hitler's bunker. Causalties would have been high and radiation- sure- but less devastating than in Japan as the rubble would have just been flattened a bit more. Germany was close with 2 radiologicals of its own, a smaller tactical 440kg mini-nuke, and SS Firedamp weapon capable of the same destruction of over 4.5 sq miles damage w/o being nuclear (60% LOX mixed with 40% fine coal dust + waxy reagent of unknown composition). It was tested in the Baltic in March but not used just like German Tabun nerve gas that could ahve been used on both fronts as a desperate measure. And LO remains ignorant of the fact that if Ford had built a 4-engine strategic bomber with superior construction and chemurgian materials then less of a chance of being shot-down which could have saved thousands of airmens' lives. Guess he doesn't care that when a 17 or 24 went down that was a loss of 10 men and 10 MGs plus the aircraft and sometimes the bombload too!!! Also, the Germans had the most uranium in the world during WW2 while the US had to bum some from Canada and then captured German stocks from Belgium and Germany! Germany could afford to ship uranium to Japan via U-boat, 2 of which surrendered post VE-Day. I suggest LO brush up on his/her WW2 history. Him or her just comes across sounding stupid...

Read the comment by "Lordy!" on AFW's "I Sell Mice" (Sep 24) & the one by "Onlooker" on his "The Somer's Grin" (Oct 14). You'll see exactly what I meant.

LO, noted evasion on your part concerning war history b/c you cannot fight me there at all. Although Germany formally surrendered at Reims on May 7, 1945, fighting continued in many areas for days and German occupation of Norway, Denmark, and the Channel Islands took weeks before full liberation. Germany still had nearly 4 million men under arms in the field upon surrender and you totally discount the remaining air and sea assets as well- like close to 1000 aircraft of all types and the U-boats in the Baltic and Atlantic (54 of which remain missing). Germany since late '44 had also moved 250,000 to S America by May 1945 which is mind boggling since the borders were sealed on 3 fronts- so how did the Nazis move them there under complete attack? And even with Hitler's death, the Second Fuhrer Doenitz made sure that he could move as many refugees from the East to the West before surrender which was 6 days after May 1, 1945 when he received word that Hitler's last will & testament were in effect. He ordered all U-boats to surrender under Operation Regenbogen (Rainbow) and naval units to remain locked down. It took the Western Allies considerable time to process everyone in their sectors while in the East the Soviets allowed the Germans to form the KVP by early 1946 to police their sector. They were led by ex-Gestapo and SS and KVP members wore Germanic type uniforms with jackboots, M43 caps, and were armed with their own weapons like the MP-40, P-38, and STG-44. If the war had gone on it would have lasted a few more weeks, but IF Hitler had NOT ordered the fight in the Ardennes and relocated his armies and assets to the Alpine Redoubt the war would have dragged on into the summer of '45. Berlin was isolated and yet it took a devastating toll on the Red Army with over 600,000 killed out of over 2.2 million men! All Berlin had was 50 under-strength units, the HJ, and Volkssturm with few tanks and AT guns (the Zoo Bunker's Flak guns turned downward). Lots of Panzerfaust, Panzerschreck, heavy MGs, and Nebelwerfers used in fierce street fighting. In April 1945 Germany was outnumbered on any avg. day 11:1 in aircraft and 200:1 in tanks!!! And yet they fought until the last day (some longer). The Army staff kept operating and awards were still being handed-out! Your surrender claims are twisted. The Germans didn't run out and surrender, they were forced to surrender due to lack of resources and sheer volume of enemy manpower and material. Unlike any of the other armies the German Army fought the full 6 years straight. That's why they had the most kills in history, even though they lost. It has been speculated postwar that had Germany had equal resources and numbers they could have conquered most of the world by themselves w/o any Italian, Japanese, or Co-Belligerent help at all!!! Also, Hitler never officially ordered an A-bomb to be developed, their program was a scientific one misinterpreted by Britain and the USA as an arms program and thus was attacked in Norway with the heavy water processing. Not until 1944 did the SS start a rapid bomb program that was split into 3 types: nuclear, radiological, and their own Firedamp weapon (the LW had its own FAE bombs and thermobaric programs). Siemens, I.G. Farben, and AEG made tremendous efforts to build cyclotrons and use both gaseous diffusion and EM separation for refing uranium to weapons grade. When the knew that time wasn't on thier side they shipped uranium and plans to Kapan via U-boat. Japan had its own A-bomb project at Konan in occupied Korea and a bomb called Genzai Bakudan. Also in 1945 Germany had its own WMDs as nerve gases: Sarin, Somen, and Tabun- the last of which was weaponized as artillery shells and aerial bombs that sat stockpiled and unused. And furthermore, SS General Kammler (in charge of Germany's most secret weapons) was considered a separate Fuhrer for the SS who escape in a Ju-390 with the Bell Device, the highest tech of WW2 (whether it was an otherwordly ANGRAV propulsion unit OR like most believe- a time machine prototype!). Even though European Germany surrendered, the SS Technical Branch + Vril under Kammler, those SS operating with Werwolves and Odessa, and SS Antarctic Base 211 did not. Argentina continued with the latter 2 while the Werwolves operated from 1945-47 mostly in the Western sectors killing collaborators, blowing up supply trains, and defying de-Nazification efforts. Other Nazis escaped to S America to continue underground activities. No one is certain if these elements of the Third Reich were ever truly stopped.

Your tireless providing of data convinces me that those of German racial stock are indeed Supermen and would have rightly ruled a world utopia if it weren't for them being numerically overwhelmed by the sub-human scum of the earth, which included Gypsies, Jews, Slavs, Negroes, effete French, effeminate English, etc. First in war; first in philosophy; first in music and literature; first in mathematics and science; first in enterprise, discipline, orderliness, and productivity; first in good looks and physical fitness; and now, I find, first in prolixity. "A time machine prototype," eh? It is no wonder that flabby America is so fearful of the master race that it stoops to tapping Ms. Merkel's cell phone!

Thank you. I wish you good health and good luck.

Note: Slight technical error on my part concerning the Brixia (not Blixia) "jerk" in the comments and parody lyrics. The Brixia was an attempt by another company to correct the faults of the Glisenti M1910 with the internal mechanisms and the side panel blowouts. The firm MBT of Brecia started in 1911 to fix the M1910 and the new Model1912 was accepted by the Italian Army on a trials basis but not as a replacement for the poor Glisenti. Some were sold abroad but production stopped in 1914 with the outbreak of WW2. It is not know what the relationship was between MBT and Glisenti of Turin. Production of the pistols took place at two entirely different locations. Some believe that MBT was a sub-unit of Glisenti while others believe MBT was hired to fix the M1910. Only one thing was certain, however- the "fixed" Brixia M1912 didn't blow-up, but tended to jerk when fired! That made both pistols unsuitable for warfare ;-)

Damn it Rob, just when I thought I had purged Screaming Jay Hawkins from my subconscious, you come up with this. So now, about a dozen times a day, this song seeps into my brain. Just yesterday, I was in Safeway, and without realizing it, I burst out into "Glisenti of no use! Was HAND MINE!" ;-D

Look on the bright side, CML... if anyone ever tries to sell you an Italian Luger-wannabe for $50, think twice. Like, "Hey wait a second... isn't that a Glisenti M1910? No f-ckin' way pal!" Might save your left hand. Or you might just buy it and ask if the guy has any original 7.65mm ammo ;-)

You know, Rob, it wasn't until this very moment of shattering clarity that I realized what "HAND mine" means ... You're not talking about mine in the personal possessive sense, you're talking about a pit where minerals are extracted, right? Of course, now it makes complete sense!! .... Unless, of course, you're talking about mine in the sense of a bomb as in "land mine", which would rhyme with "hand mine" and which would suggest something that backfires and severely injures your hand ... Nah, that can't be it

CML, you seem to enjoy this parody so much that you should read my parody of the MARS Pistol (a Hand Cannon):
http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/screaminjayhawkins962.shtml