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Song Parodies -> "This Old Spouse"

Original Song Title:

"This Ole House"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Rosemary Clooney

Parody Song Title:

"This Old Spouse"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

Alvin Rhodes was the first to use this title for a fine and humorous parody, check it out here, http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/rosemaryclooney0.shtml ....Mine takes on a more serious approach......
This ole spouse once cooked my dinner
This ole spouse once warmed my bed
This ole spouse was quite a looker
In our young years, when we wed..
This ole spouse once made my socks roll
Up and down along my calf
Now, she's terminal and dyin'
Have to help her take a bath

CHORUS:
Ain't a-gonna have this spouse much longer
Ain't a-gonna hold this spouse much more
She is on the porch of glory
Soon she'll knock at Heaven's door
She's a fighter, but it's count eight
On the canvas, now she kneels
I just hope they'll let her in there
On a mobile scooter that has four wheels

This ole spouse is a-gettin' shaky
This ole spouse is a-gettin' old
This old spouse and I shared tears
Miles of treasured mem'ries gold
When she tells me that she's chilly
I bring blankets, don't complain
Hold her hand and read the bible
All I can, to ease her pain

Ain't a-gonna have this spouse much longer
Ain't a-gonna hold this spouse much more
Standin' on the porch of glory,
Soon she'll knock at Heaven's door
She's a fighter, but it's count eight
On the canvas, now she kneels
I just hope they'll let her in there
On a mobile scooter that has four wheels

This ole spouse once done the laundry
Cleaned the house and she raised four kids
While I worked down at the factory
Loadin' trucks and movin' skids
This ole spouse kept us together
Yelled at me when I was weak
Long to hear her shout once more
But, she don't have the power to move or speak

Ain't a-gonna have this spouse much longer,
Ain't a-gonna hold this spouse much more
She is on the porch of glory
Soon she'll knock at Heaven's door
She's a fighter, but it's count eight
On the canvas, now she kneels
I just hope they'll let her in there
On a mobile scooter that has four wheels

This ole spouse was always faithful
I wish I could say the same
Once I cheated, hurt her badly
Her forgiveness smothered shame
When she's gone this house will wither
Winds will moan against the walls
But, I'll be here to love her spirit
Till that old grim reaper calls

Ain't a-gonna have this spouse much longer
Ain't a-gonna hold this spouse much more
She is on the porch of glory
Sonn she'll knock at Heaven's door
She's a fighter, but it's count eight
On the canvas, now she kneels
I just hope they'll let her in there
On a mobile scooter that has four wheels

I just hope they'll let her in there
On a mobile scooter that has four wheels..



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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   7
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Bob Emmet/Project Sisyphus - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
This parody inspires more tears than laughter; nonetheless, it's a brilliant lyric. Nicely done.
alvin - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
a wondeful mix of humor and pathos
John Barry - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
I couldn't have said it better than Bob and Alvin.
AFW - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks to Bob, and alvin, and John
Tommy Turtle - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
I couldn't have said it better than John, alvin, and Bob. Hope it's not true, but if it is, deepest sympathy and best wishes to both.
TJC - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellence abounds... and a nice change from straight up funny... agree with Bob's thoughts on this fine work, AFW
AFW - September 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, TT...True for a friend, sad to say, but not I...and thanks TJC
Susanna Viljanen - September 19, 2007 - Report this comment
555 knocks on Heaven's door
AFW - September 20, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, Susanna

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