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Song Parodies -> "I Enjoy Being A Churl"
Original Song Title:
"I Enjoy Being A Girl"
Original Performer:
Rodgers & Hammerstein
Parody Song Title:
"I Enjoy Being A Churl"
Parody Written by:
Stan Hall
The Lyrics
"I Enjoy Being A Churl
A “snarl in a suit”** I’ve been called,
Many say that I make them hurl
But slurs carom like taws pin-balled
I enjoy being a churl!
A browbeating big-mouth bully,
Like “Big Daddy” as played by Burl,
I am, and I say truthfully:
I enjoy being a churl!
Unlike many Veeps that you could mention
Who focused upon their pro tem’s bench
My main job’s to draw pundit’s attention
While my boss goes to work on the world with a monkey wrench.
I’m strictly a three-P VP:
I’m “Pugnacity’s Perfect Pearl,”
But my one “kryptonite” is TP,
You’ll feel joy when you apply it to a churl like me.
My hatred of queers is steely
But since my daughter loves a girl
I double my standards freely.
I enjoy being a churl!
I love swapping weights of taxes
So my pals who’ve grown rich in “erl”
Watch theirs wane while poor folks’ waxes
I enjoy being a churl!
I love baiting Liberals, and when they
Won’t bite I am left a little blue.
My heart triples size when I’m called “Grinch” … Hey
If you say you’re Who from Whoville I’ll get you!
I’m strictly a three-P VP:
I’m “Pugnacity’s Perfect Pearl,”
But my one “kryptonite” is TP,
You’ll feel joy when you apply it to a churl like me.
A “snarl in a suit”** I’ve been called,
Many say that I make them hurl
But slurs carom like taws pin-balled
I enjoy being a churl!
A browbeating big-mouth bully,
Like “Big Daddy” as played by Burl,
I am, and I say truthfully:
I enjoy being a churl!
Unlike many Veeps that you could mention
Who focused upon their pro tem’s bench
My main job’s to draw pundit’s attention
While my boss goes to work on the world with a monkey wrench.
I’m strictly a three-P VP:
I’m “Pugnacity’s Perfect Pearl,”
But my one “kryptonite” is TP,
You’ll feel joy when you apply it to a churl like me.
My hatred of queers is steely
But since my daughter loves a girl
I double my standards freely.
I enjoy being a churl!
I love swapping weights of taxes
So my pals who’ve grown rich in “erl”
Watch theirs wane while poor folks’ waxes
I enjoy being a churl!
I love baiting Liberals, and when they
Won’t bite I am left a little blue.
My heart triples size when I’m called “Grinch” … Hey
If you say you’re Who from Whoville I’ll get you!
I’m strictly a three-P VP:
I’m “Pugnacity’s Perfect Pearl,”
But my one “kryptonite” is TP,
You’ll feel joy when you apply it to a churl like me.
** If I recall correctly, this gem's unlikely utterer was George F. Will, in an op-ed piece that ran in the Washington Post several years ago.
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User Comments
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yep, he puts the vice in vice president alright...especially like the "burl" reference
Awww.... I thought this was gonna be about medieval peasants.... ;-)
Flunking myself w/ 1s on this one. The line following "3-P VP" should read "Perfect Pearl of Pugnancity" to conform w/ R&H's original rhyme scheme. Problem is, I clicked the effing "Send" button before making the change but after after some stanza position swaps moved stanza from an "irl"-rhyme position to the "ee"-rhyme position. Grrr! :-(
But thanks for the positives anyway. :-)
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