You could tell I was from the suburbs,
Right from here in town.
My ball cap was on backwards
And my jeans was fallin' down.

Chorus:
But I ain't Rappin'.
Ain't Rock n' Rollin'.
I guess to some folks I looked ghoulish,
But the Bluegrass has made a new man out of me.

Had rings through my ear lobes,
Rings through my nose,
Rings through my anklebones
Weren't no room fo' mo'.

Chorus

I was in a Texas mosh pit.
Got hit in the head.
Saw bright lights in a tunnel.
And I knew that I was dead.

Chorus

Saw a figure standin'
Wearing a wide brimmed hat,
Holdin' a golden mandolin,
He said, "Ain't your time, now scat!"

Chorus

I came to in Kentucky
With a CD in my hand.
It was, "The Best of Bill Monroe",
Now you can understand.

Chorus
Why I ain't ......

I have scraped off all my tatoos,
Waxed in all the holes.
Bought myself a mandolin
So I can be like Bill Monroe.

Chorus.

Spoken: (W.S.M. impression) "Mighty fine. It's a FA-vo-right of mine". Mandolin riff: Intro to "Mule Skinner Blues" and out.