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Song Parodies -> "If I Only Had A Brain (George W. Bush)"

Original Song Title:

"If I Only Had A Brain"

Original Performer:

Ray Bolger

Parody Song Title:

"If I Only Had A Brain (George W. Bush)"

Parody Written by:

Laurel Kornfeld

The Lyrics

This parody makes fun of George W. Bush and the 2000 presidential election. The "I" speaking is Bush.
Oh, I could while away the hours
Conferring with world powers
Defeating Saddam Hussein

My head I'd be busy scratchin'
With those tax cuts busy hatchin'
If I only had a brain!

I could really be a someone
Not just my daddy's "dumb" one
A man in his own vain!

With the thoughts I'd be thinkin'
I'd have reason to stop drinkin'
If I only had a brain!

Oh, I could tell you why
You should re-elect me in 2004
I could even win a debate against Al Gore
And I could count and recount chads some more!

I could write all my own speeches
Understand what Cheney teaches
Relieve the whole world's pain!

I'd be a presidential chief,
Not just an election thief
If I only had a brain!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.6
How Funny: 3.4
Overall Rating: 3.4

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - October 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Great lines, rhymes, an overall fantastic job, here...fives up
Linda - October 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Gee, a new parody about an election 5 years ago and making note of an election that has happened in "real life", but not yet in your parody makes me think you are the demoncrat most in denial yet! Honey, maybe a therapist could be of service to help you grasp reality, it's 2005, Bush won AGAIN, you lost, you are a loser. You have no new material in that itty bitty head that you took your sorry bitterness back that far? Well, maybe it takes someone to tutor you on current events and you are a slow learner... By the way, Bush doesn't drink, everyone knows that, just like they know Kerry's IQ was LOWER than Bush's and in Yale, The Cowardly War Criminal Kerry Got = D's and F's = and I would say, that's "two for two for the girl with no clue" Forgive my rude comments if it so happens you have been in a long coma, cuz if that is the case, I was just insensitive huh? Kinda like you are to Bush? -- Later, I am going back to the future, you have fun on your hobby horse in the snow.
carol - October 03, 2005 - Report this comment
get a grip on yourself linda you're starting to sound really nasty again
Immoral Liberal - October 03, 2005 - Report this comment
Kerry the Cowardly War Criminal? Linda, my ultra right-wing, religious nut and fascist friend - what do you call the comings and goings of drunk dubya during that time? We can't even get a straight answer as to what barstool the moron was falling off of. Now we do know that around that time Laura, his wife, had killed someone a few years earlier. But Dubya? Let's see, Daddy got him into the Guard, but nobody remembers seeing him - we do know that he would be in a drunk and/or cocaine induced stupor for the next 15 or so years. I don't expect you to answer this question - you never do - we'll all just get some 500 word pscho babble that nobody will read. I ask again, are they putting speed in the kool aid? REPUBLICAN CULTURE OF CORRUPTION.
Laurel Kornfeld - October 03, 2005 - Report this comment
I actually wrote this in December 2000, but I only found out about this web site now and felt that since it refers it refers to an event we all remember, I decided to put it on this site.

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