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Song Parodies -> "I'm Marrying My Momma, I'm A Man Who's Mainly Oedi"

Original Song Title:

"I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General"

Original Performer:

Pirates of Penzance

Parody Song Title:

"I'm Marrying My Momma, I'm A Man Who's Mainly Oedi"

Parody Written by:

Leo Jay

The Lyrics

I wanna marry Momma -- yes, my mission's mainly Oedipal
My reasons, as you'll see, are level-headed and quite sensible
From birth, dear Momma would ensure I always had enough to eat
She'd cuddle me and coo to me, caressing as I sucked her teat
When I got wet, she'd change me and rub powder on my tender buns
And kiss my upper regions while she covered up my nether ones
Throughout the years I've met a lot of virgins, vamps, and vegan girls
But Momma's been the only one-stop bathin'/dressin'/feedin' girl...
Some girls I've known are short and sweet, and some have legs from here to there
While some are very modest, others have no use for underwear

But all the girls I've known and loved are, in the end, forgettable
I wanna marry Momma -- yes, my mission's mainly Oedipal

When I was three months old, dear Momma went to work to earn a wage
And left me in the care of an au pair who seemed quite underage
My food was fairly flat, for Brenda didn't have her boobies yet
So even if I tried to suck, alas, there was no food to get
I found that when your nanny is too young to wear a Wonderbra
You find yourself reduced to store-bought baby food and formula
So once dear momma went to work, I suckled less and nibbled more
(If I can't get my liquid lunch, then what the heck's a nipple for?)
I learned a luncheon lesson: that au pairs can't be relied upon,
That for the freshest food, there was but one to set my sights upon:

The other girls serve phony food that's somewhat less than edible
I wanna marry Momma -- yes, my mission's mainly Oedipal

When I was nine, I had a friend (I thought) in darling Tiffany
One day as we held hands, I felt a strange and sudden stiffening
Still unaware, she gabbed away, adorned in pretty braids and dress
When suddenly, I lost control and (oops!), I went and made a mess
"Of course," I thought, "my darling friend will gladly clean and powder me..."
But she just stared aghast and then began to shriek and shout at me
From doodies in my di-a-pers to breastfeeding and babybibs,
No other girl cleaned up for me the way my darling Momma did
When things get hard, you'll often look around to find your friends are gone
In sticky situations, girlfriends cannot be depended on

The other girls I've known and loved have let me down in general
I wanna Marry Momma -- yes, my mission's mainly Oedipal

When I was twelve, my babysitter Cynthia was warm and sweet
But more than that, she had been blessed with really quite enormous teats
By then, of course, I knew full well my sitters weren't a source of food,
But one day, as we had a chat, she said something I misconstrued
I told the tale of Tiffany; she sympathized with that ordeal
She held me tight and promised me she'd treat me to a 'happy' meal
But as I bent to suckle, she jumped back and gave my face a slap
I felt as though I'd walked into a cunning linguist's boobie-trap!
Well, all my life, I've felt that every girl I meet's a mystery
So yes, call me a 'Momma's boy' -- all other girls are history...


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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   20

User Comments

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Arwen - March 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Unbelievable! Excellent work. Bastard.
Rex - March 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks for teating us - uh, I mean treating us - to this parody!
MrMacphisto - March 27, 2005 - Report this comment
LMAO! This is easily my favorite of the day, and I think you might have a shot at Song of the Month with this one. Spaff has provided some stiff competition, though....
TJC - March 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Fantastic word play, pacing and story telling. Should be t'op o' the month' as far as I'm concerned (there's only 27 days in March, right?)
Andy Senior (aka The Carpal Tunnel Kid) - March 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent. A delightful stroll down mammary lane.
Leo Jay - March 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks very much, everyone! But what happened to my parody title? I may be 'Oedi', but I'm no Munster...
Kat - March 28, 2005 - Report this comment
OK, this guy has enough issues that Jacko would refer him to his shrink.
Ashkicksass - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Michael Pacholek - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
They say this cat Leo is a bad... (Shut your mouth!) But he's a very good parodist. (And we can dig it!) He's a complicated man, and no one understands him but his mommy. But, truth be told, I'm hoping (People, you may want to cover your eyes for this hellacious pun) that this song is just a Sigmund of your imagination.
Stuart McArthur - March 31, 2005 - Report this comment
excellent - loved the "misconstrued" fit - 555
Adagio - July 05, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Very good parody.
Agrimorfee - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) I echo Arwen's sentiments.
Red Ant - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(I-05) I've listened to this several time on my PoP CD and am still getting lost here. Won't wreck your 5s going, but this is very funny Leo.
Rich Kapalin - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Rhyming "nibbled more" and "nipple for" deserves all 5's!
Arwen - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC--I am still floored by this, of my very favorites of yours...=)
MysteryGoat - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) I know this song is quite sick, but this has to be the best thing I've read on here! "Weird Al" himself would bow to this.
Mikey Squirrel - July 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Very well done. Your Mom would be proud. Or horrified. Or both. I guess. Tri-Fives.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - July 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) You've done it again, you word wizard. "Cunning linguist's boobie-trap"? You. freaking. genius. Take. these. 5s. and. go.
Johnny D - July 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) WOW !!!
Stuart McArthur - July 11, 2005 - Report this comment
( I ) - well, what with Brenda, Tiffany and Cynthia, it's not as though you haven't TRIED elsewhere, Leo - loved the idea, loved the execution - oh, and the couplet I referred to before
Scathe - July 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-I) Yikes!
Rick C - July 15, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Great stuff, Leo! Well written, clever and very funny.....555
Leo Jay - July 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, with all these votes, some individual thanks are certainly due:

Arwen: "Unbelievable"? I hope so! I mean, I love my mom, but, geez… Thanks, Princess!

Rex: You're welcome. Hope you enjoyed every drop!

MrMacphisto: Slow day, as I recall

TJC: You're too kind. Well… no -- appropriately kind.

Andy Senior: "mammary lane"?… we call that cleavage.

. Kat: Hey, at least THIS guys' momma wouldn't let HIM show up for court in his PJs…

Ash: Speechless? Obviously an imposter! What have you done with Ash?!? !

Michael Pacholek: *groan* I Kant believe that one...

Stuart McArthur: Yeah, it's not as though I haven't… I mean 'HE' hasn't -- shopped around. Glad it held up on second reading.

Adagio: Excellent comment!

Ag: Thank you. I echo my response to Arwen.

Red Ant: Thanks " sorry for the confusion. I really should have written out all the repeating sections. Never be afraid to tell the emperor he has no clothes. Or to cite him for nudity.

Rich Kapalin: Glad you liked that one!

MysteryGoat: If this has any value, it's BECAUSE it's sick, not IN SPITE of it!

Mikey Squirrel: Horrified, probably.

Jake A Ralphing: I'll. Take. Those. Thanks. Genius.

Johnny D: THANKS!

Scathe: I know " scary…

Rick C: Thanks very much, good sir!
Adam Eccleshall - July 16, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Excellent.. 5's :-)
Dee Range - July 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Absolutely Brilliant, Leo. Mama would be proud, I think :-))
Ethan Mawyer - July 17, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC - Brilliant. nothing else to say. 5s don't do it justice
martha - July 17, 2005 - Report this comment
very clever parody if totally off the wall!
Jeff Reuben - July 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent. Mom would be proud, even if you didn't marry her.
ABC's OF PARODIES ROUND " I " GOLD MEDAL - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment;topic=3010.0;id=7400;image
Johnny D - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC Finals) See above!

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