-> "Old Man Winter"
Original Song Title:
"Old Man River"
Parody Song Title:
"Old Man Winter"
The Lyrics
There’s an old man from the realm of Nature.
There’s an old man, rules three months a year.
What does he care if he overdoes it?
What does he care if we’re suff’ring here?
Old Man Winter,
That Old Man Winter,
He thinks he’s something;
He’s good for nothing.
He just keeps blowing;
He keeps on snowing around.
He freeze your fingers.
He freeze your toes, an’
The folks outside, they
Will soon be frozen,
But Old Man Winter,
He just keeps snowing around.
Tree limbs break! The roofs cave in!
People are sliding on black ice thin!
Snow in sheets! Rain in pails!
We get a little sleet that’s like pelts of hail!
We’re so weary!
This winter’s trying!
But in the summer,
We’ll all be frying!
So Old Man Winter,
He just keeps snowing around!
***
Blizzards all blow on the farm and city.
Blizzards all blow in the North and South!
Blizzards all blow, even in Hawaii—
‘Cept the West Coast, where they’re parched with drought.
Snow piles up,
And temps fall down.
The salt’s run out!
The school’s closed down!
Puddles lie
Beneath the slush!
We need some sleds
With dogs that “mush”!
Gotta go ‘way from the Polar Vortex!
Gotta go ‘way from the Arctic Blast!
Why is it warm at the Games in Sochi?
Gotta go now kick that Groundhog’s *ss!
***
[repeat main part of song, with inserts:
…Old Man Winter forever keeps snowing on…
…Old Man Winter, I wish he were gone!]
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 3.3 | |
How Funny: | 3.1 | |
Overall Rating: | 3.1 | |
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Total Votes: | 7 |
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Voting Breakdown
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