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Song Parodies -> "Take'em Out Of The Ball Game"

Original Song Title:

"Take Me Out To The Ball Game"

Original Performer:

Nora Bayes (wife of lyricist)

Parody Song Title:

"Take'em Out Of The Ball Game"

Parody Written by:

Stan Hall

The Lyrics

An incident at Seattle’s Safeco Park (see that was likely good for nothing else inspired this parody. Apparently the Kiss Cam isn’t for everyone. :-)
Take’em out of the ballgame,
making out’s not allowed—
not if a p*nis both smackers lack.
Life’s unfair in the Mariner’s shack
where they’ll boot two cuties' "Sappho team,”
their PDAs deem a shame.
And you’re goin’ to see dykes thrown out at the old … ball … game.
© Stan Hall

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   3

User Comments

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alvin - October 21, 2008 - Report this comment
there's a unique
John Barry - October 21, 2008 - Report this comment
The great American pastime!
Stan - October 21, 2008 - Report this comment
... and Seattle's always seemed such an open-minded city to me. Maybe it's just the particular friends I visit there. Shrug.
KintarosTiger - October 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Ya wouldn't have to be a lesbian hater, would you?
Stan - October 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Tiger ... ? Not sure whether you're saying lesbian hatred was unneccessary to be offended by the kiss or siggesting that 'm a lesbian hater. The latter is certainly not so, and, while I don't suppose all the complainers were or considered themselves "lesbian haters," the preponderance of what I've I've seen/heard about the incident both online and from eyewitness acquaintances suggest the complainers' about the kiss overreacted. Anyway, the whole thing reminded me of this true and mildly funny story re ballpark “misbehavior” I personally experienced: At an O’s game a few years ago with my wife and daughter, then about 19, the latter remarked in a normal, not loud, voice to her mom “That [center fielder] Brady Anderson has a really cute butt.” A 40-ish fellow sitting directly in front of her turned and, indicating a group of 12-or-so-year-olds strung along his row, with manifest umbrage snorted “There are children here!” When perhaps 10 minutes later the man left to fetch drinks and snacks for said “children,” his back was barely turned before the lot of them whipped out from their jeans pockets stacks of trading cards and began swapping them ’round.. Baseball cards, you’re thinking. Nope … cards with naked women in suggestive poses. What a temptation it was – resisted, tho’ – to rat them out just to see the man’s reaction to his gang of innocents' lack of innocence.
EmiLoca - October 21, 2008 - Report this comment
This is wonderful.
Desmond Pacholek - October 22, 2008 - Report this comment
I also liked it
KintarosTiger - October 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Oh... I see... I am quite sorry.

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