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Song Parodies -> "Seventy-Six Calzones"

Original Song Title:

"Seventy-Six Trombones"

Original Performer:

Meredith Wilson

Parody Song Title:

"Seventy-Six Calzones"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Seventy Six Calzones (my 15 Seconds of Fame are up, thank you Pizza Hut)

Seventy-six hambones ate the big fat pig
With a hundred tons of corn chips-- gross fat man!
They were followed by rows and rows of the fattest - Nachos
Oh whoa! Ice cream of ev'ry famous brand.

Seventy-six calzones bought the meddling skunk
With one hundred tons corn chips (huge behind).
He weighs more than a thousand trees
Munching all the feed
He leaves tons of heavy shite behind.

Bear wolfs: Whopper combos, paninis, that buffoon!
Thundering, thundering farts engulf his Hanes.
Taco bell, his cronies, dim! the big buffoons!
Leech! Buffoon! having his big buffet!

Bear wolfs: fifty thousand calzones at a half past three
Blundering, plundering chowder, he’s a whore!
Raisinets, no exercise!
Big grumpy troll, he’s not so Wise
Red bull, Oxycontin: that whale’s shored!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.6
How Funny: 3.4
Overall Rating: 3.3

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   2
 3   1
 4   1
 5   4

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jim Rotondo - March 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Three 5's from this Sicilian, loved it!
Harry - March 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Jim! I'm in Music Man mode this week.
2Eagle - March 11, 2009 - Report this comment
One more slap in the face for the food Nazis - 5's.
Harry - March 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, 2Eagle. food Nazis? never heard that one.
Andria - March 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Harry: Google "soup nazi". That was a Seinfeld character, and it made its way into pop culture. DKTOS, so no vote.
Hanes Salesman of the Year - March 11, 2009 - Report this comment
I resent and secretly dug this parody... some raw potential here, dude...
Harry - March 12, 2009 - Report this comment
Andria: it's a song from "the Music Man"--a broadway musical, and also a movie with music by Meredith Wilson. One of the great all time classic musicals. Thanks, Guy Hanes. and my Security is U8Z (you ate Ziti?)
Michael Pacholek - March 13, 2009 - Report this comment
I give this one a 380. Divide that by 76, and you'll see what I mean.

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