[In] Lambeth, they don't talk proppa
Your feet are "plates", a lie's a "whoppa"
It hasn't got the "Cockney" name
But it sounds pretty much the same
They speak the "Lambeth" way,
Not like you, much more outré
Translating it can be much fun
Or not...


Any time you're Lambeth way
Any evening, any day
You'll hear 'em all talking the Lambeff Tawk

Find a little Lambeff Bird
Hang upon her every word:
You'll have a ball 'earing the Lambeff Tawk

Never hear "Gosh" or "Crikey"
Not at all Dick van Dyke-y
Hearing 'em speak is... really...
English? Nearly..

Listen out down Lambeth way,
'Ear wo' all the people say
You'll 'ear 'em all doin' the Lambeff talk:

Of the "t-h" sound, bereft
'Cause in Lambeff, it's an "f"
They fink it's cool, doin' the Lambeff talk

Hear when you're Lambeth way
Trailing 'g' pronounced as 'k'
There's nuffink like - 'earin' the Lambeff talk

Every stop is glottal
'Ear i' in "wha'" or "bo''le"
Sumfink you'll never see there:
'H' there - 'T' there.

Wonder if they get their way
When they go to church and pray
[Does] God understand prayer in Lambeff talk?

Anytime you're Lambeth way
Any evening, any day,
You'll find 'em all doin' the Lambeth talk.

Ev'ry little Lambeth gal
[Send] shivers down your root canal
Don't it appal? Doin' the Lambeff talk.

Head dairn there if you like it
If you think you can take it¹
But don' stay there for ages
It's con-
Tageous

Stay too long dairn Lambeff way
Say, and evenin' or a day
You'll find yourself
Doin' the Lambeff-
Doin' the Lambeff-
Doin' the Lambeff talk!