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Song Parodies -> "The Battle Hymn of the Tinpot Dictator"

Original Song Title:

"The Battle Hymn of the Republic"

Original Performer:

Julia Ward Howe

Parody Song Title:

"The Battle Hymn of the Tinpot Dictator"

Parody Written by:

Susanna Viljanen

The Lyrics

Our country is located in some warm and cosy land
it's called some "El" or "San" or maybe ends with suffix "-stan"
Now I'm the one in power and I have a title grand
my rule is marching on!

Glory, all you hail Big Brother!
Reforms? It's something I won't bother
'cause Treasury's kept by my mother
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

Our army gets three fourths of ou-er yearly GNP
our main exports? Bananas, camels, cotton and morphine
Our police force is mighty and our prisons hells are sheer
my whims are marching on!

Glory, ready, aim and fire!
Dissidents, we hang them higher -
Behead those who won't me admire
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

Now everybody loves me, I get hundred percent votes
although elections may be rigged but who'd have second thoughts?
Our system, it is perfect and protected by cut-throats
my goonies are marching on!

Glory, everybody hail me!
we shoot you if you ever fail me
God forbid you try derail me -
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

Our country has religion strong, though clergy mad may be
I tell I am the Chosen One and God is siding me
'Cause if I weren't in power we'd be a the-o-cracy -
our religion's marching on!

Glory, name of God or Allah!
Wouldya - have rather Ayatollah?
It could be worse than you can think of
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

Our education's excellent, 'cause that's official creed
we have a public library and some of us can read
Brainwash is thing which keeps our kids from thinking wrong, indeed
our creed is marching on!

Glory, teach the kids to praise me
worship and adore always me -
Wisdom sole is to rephrase me
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

Ideology, ours' perfect and the source of our well-being
it's based on thoughts of certain Adolf H - you guessed that thing
Our people work like ants and they all like to praise and sing
our system's marching on!

Glory, they love forced labor!
they all love to live in squalor
Next we will invade our neighbour
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

Our climate, it is lovely, we have oil and gold and tea
though our deficit is higher than the Everest, you see
Our money's worth of paper it is printed on, maybe -
our debt is marching on!

Glory, hyper-high-inflation
Economy's scourge of our nation
We have potatoes on the ration
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

I am sane as Ivan Terrible and my hero's that old Czar
I have mindset of Caligula and my thoughts are bit bizarre
If I don't have thing for afternoon maybe I'd declare a war
our army is marching on!

Glory, war and carnage, slaughter
We'll conscript your sons and daughter -
We invade our neighbour and another
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

If should UN get worried - or the US get bit freaked
I declare I am the hero of Third World and poor and weak
I rule my land with iron fist and uprisings I will tweak
my terror's marching on!

Glory, hero of the nation!
Praised on every TV station!
Raise our daily sugar ration!
I'm the Tinpot Dictator!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   1
 3   2
 4   2
 5   10

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Jenkins - December 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Wonderful spoof, Susanna. All of the verses are good, but the Ivan Terrible/Caligula verse is probably my fave. I think the pacing of the "Tinpot Dictator lines is a bit off, though.
Rob Arndt - December 14, 2016 - Report this comment
555! But as for Nazi ideology, it's more complex than just Hitler's views growing up and "the stab in the back." The Nazi Party existed before Hitler originating in 1919 with the Thule Gesellschaft and later added the Vril Gesellschaft and the DHvSS. Therefore, it was an odd mixture of occultism, metaphysical beliefs, nationalism, Prussian militarism, anti-Semitism, and then 1930s fascism. Hitler was true party member 555, not number 7 which was falsified. Thule chose him, Thule groomed him as F├╝hrer. They could have rejected him and chosen someone else...
Patrick - December 14, 2016 - Report this comment
I found your parody just after reading an article about the hyper inflation in Venezuela. A characteristic of irrational governments you mention in your song. "I tell I am the Chosen One and God is siding me" is not perfect idiomatic English, but it works well. A very flexible language. You are allowed to contribute. "Got mit uns" as you might read on certain military belt buckles. A good summary of dictators everywhere. And, of course, to my favourite tune.
Rob Arndt - December 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Patrick, "Gott Mit Uns" (God with us) originated with the Prussian military, the buckle with the imperial crown. Although the Nazis used the expression, the Reichsadler was substituted, suggesting that God was with the Reich, not the old Kaiser or Koenig. Btw, "In God We Trust" on our currency is just about as meaningless at this point.
Susanna Viljanen - December 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Thanks to everyone who voted my parody! I attempted to imagine the worst aspects of dictatorship ever - a nutty, insanely violent dictator whose whims are the law, the rule of terror, wanton imprisonments and executions, religious fanaticism, a very backwards economy based on subsistence, raw materials and drugs, a fiscal catastrophe and continuous war. The irony is that such countries _could_ really be paradises on Earth if some things were somehow otherwise.
Michael Pacholek - December 15, 2016 - Report this comment
This would be a whole lot funnier if "we" hadn't just "elected" Trump.
WTH? - December 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Are you really gonna compare rich, spoiled businessman Trump with dictators Hitler, Stalin, Mao, Kim Jong Un, & company just because Queen Hillary lost? What world do you live in?
Patrick - December 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Trump will have the mainstream media watching his every move. One of the seldom mentioned but favorable side effects. He won't be able to get away with the sort of behavior that Hillary Clinton would have. 2017 will be an interesting year.

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