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Song Parodies -> "Big Bad Mac"

Original Song Title:

"Big Bad John"

Original Performer:

Jimmy Dean

Parody Song Title:

"Big Bad Mac"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Big Mac

Big Mac

Every mornin' in the line, you can see 'em arrive
With their eyeballs bulged, each weighs three forty five
Guys and broads, young and older, not narrow at the hips
Gettin' ready, set to chew, and lickin' on their lips - for Big Mac
(Big Mac, Big Mac) Big Bad Mac (Big Mac)

Everybody seems to know, McDee's their home
Just got back from KFC, lickin' fingers and bone
They never talk much, just a gleam in their eye
If they speak at all, they just say, "Buy" for Big Mac

From LA to New York, Fargo to New Orleans
They show up day and night, decked out in cupcake jeans
Chompin' monster bites with a huge right hand
You get hit with lettuce schrapnel, if too close you stand, Big Mac
(Big Mac, Big Mac) Big Bad Mac (Big Mac)

Then came the day when the last one in the line
Had a hunger seize and she fell down cryin'
Onlookers panicked, cuz' her eyes were glassed
And everybody knew that she would need one fast, Big Mac
(Big Mac, Big Mac) Big Bad Mac (Big Mac)

Through the hunger and lust of that gnawin' hell
Burst a giant of a broad that the cashiers knew well
Grabbed her fallen sister, with a puckered moan
Gave her mouth to mouth Mac, till she stood on her own, Thanks Mac!
(Big Mac, Big Mac) Big Bad Mac (Big Mac)

Then came a huge outburst, everybody roared
One big "Mac'er" yelled out, "It's a miracle, Lord!"
And twenty more chorus'd, with a Mac-grip wave
That's the third one today, that a Mac would save, Big Mac

With snacks and bagfuls, she was served, and turned 'round
Thundered off with a rumble to the booth eatin' ground
From the lettuce and gas belchin' out from her nine,
Everybody knew that she would be just fine, Thanks, Mac
(Big Mac, Big Mac) Big Bad Mac (Big Mac)

Well, next morning when the news got wind of it
They awarded heroine chubby, in an interview sit
Years supply, in line, won't need to stand
On her bottom, can recline in her big, big, van, Big Mac
(Big Mac, Big Mac) Big Bad Mac (Big Mac)

(Big Mac)

Big Bad Mac...

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   12

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rob Arndt - August 17, 2012 - Report this comment
This parody is phat... or at least will make you fat- 555 calories! Actually the facts: 1 big mac, = 540 calories 1 large fry= 500 calories 1 large coke 32 oz 310 calories grand total 1350 calories 54 G fat 14 g saturated fat ...
Patrick - August 17, 2012 - Report this comment
Memories of what used to be before Big Macs caught up with this "Mac".
Bill ClinTTon - August 17, 2012 - Report this comment
Hey, you pickin' on my favorite food? ... well, *second* favorite, wink. ;)

(back as self again) McD has been on a kick advertising "under 400 cal. items" lately. I swear that the last time I indulged, there was a lot less Secret Sauce, probably to cut said calorie count, leaving it rather dry. Hey, people do not go to Mickey D's for health food! (note "indulged"). Good one.
Brock O'Brahma - August 18, 2012 - Report this comment
This parody reminds me of "Supersize Me", Morgan Spurlock's documentary in which he ate only McD food for thirty days. His body, at first, rejected it with vomiting. Then the addictive process kicked in and he got almost a euphoric feeling after each meal. At three weeks, a doctor who was monitoring his health told him his liver was dying.
Andy Primus - August 18, 2012 - Report this comment
Well done. I haven't eaten any McD food in well over 10 years although I'm quite partial to one of their choc shakes on a hot day (of which we get about 10 per year if we're lucky).
Dave W, - August 19, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm getting hunger pains just reading this,,,,,Plenty of quit wit here,,,,Cupcake jeans and -to the booth eatin' ground were very tasty words indeed,,,, and - Mouth to mouth Mac - I almost gagged from the thought,,,,You get free 5's for that,!
AFW - August 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks, all, for clever and interesting comments...and also, thanks to the anonymous votay..
Meriadoc - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
You know, I really don't think I've ever even eaten a Big Mac. I'm kinda partial to their little flat pseudo-soy burger thingies. With extra pickles of course.

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