Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "A Little Fane"

Original Song Title:

"A Little Priest"

Original Performer:

Helena Bonham Carter & Johnny Depp

Parody Song Title:

"A Little Fane"

Parody Written by:

Ben Ritchie and Joe Velazquez

The Lyrics

This song was me and my friend hating all the favorites in theatre at my school, so we invented this song
Ben: Seems a downright shame"
Joe: Shame?
Ben: Seems an awful waste. Such a nice plump frame Adam Fane has. Had. Has. Nor it can't be traced. Business needs a lift. Revenge to be taken. Think of it as thrift, as a gift, if you get my drift. No? Seems an awful waste. I mean, with how bad of an actor he is, when he's cast, which is always.
Joe: Ah…
Ben: Good you got it. Take for instance his role as Skimbleshanks. Couldn't hold the note right and he still gets praise. As a result the audience needs a clue. But nevertheless what they need is people like us. Those who take things seriously, aren't prima donnas, and aren't jerks.
Joe: My friend, what a charming notion!
Ben: They'll get what they deserve and we'll be on top eventually.
Joe: Eminently practical and yet appropriate as always! Ben Ritchie, how I've lived without you all these years I'll never know.
Ben: Mr. V, I'm glad you agree, I'm a good influence, aren't I?
Joe: How choice! How rare! For what's the sound on the stage up there?
Ben: What, Mr. V, what Mr. V, what is that sound?
Joe: Those off-key screeches pervading the air!
Ben: Yes, Mr. V, yes, Mr. V, yes, all around!
Joe: It's actors killing each role, my friend!
Both: But don't you worry, it soon will all end
Ben: (Chuckles) So true, Mr. V
Joe: As Todd would say, Ben. These are desperate times, Ben. And desperate measures are called for
Ben: And as Mrs. Lovett would say "Here we are. Hot from the oven." Pulls out Adam's head in the shape of a pie.
Joe: (Looks at the head) Hmm...I see where you're going at with this, but what do you suggest? We can't kill Adam and make him into a pie
Ben: (smiles) It's Fane. Have a little Fane.
Joe: How do I do that?
Ben: Then at least humiliate him. There again, he does it to himself.
Joe: (Looks around) He's really quite a twerp
Ben: (sings) Let the twerp carry on.
Joe: Instead of Fane, haven't you got Peterman or someone like that?
Ben: No, you see the trouble with Peterman is that he may someday get a clue. Try the Fane.
Joe: (Tastes it) Hmm...
Ben: Well, Mr. V
Joe: (Smiles) Dumbly. As in A-dumb
Ben: (Cackles in laughter)
Joe: Not as smart as Aaron perhaps
Ben: And very filling. Always leaves you wanting more.
Joe: (Nods)
Ben: Trouble is, it's hard to get.
Joe: Who else you have in mind?
Ben: Kline is rather nice
Joe: If he’s for the price
Ben: Try something else though to follow since no one should swallow it twice.
Joe: Anything with dork?
Ben: Well if you're British and loyal you might enjoy Caitlin Borek. Anyway, it's clean. Although she's done too many blowjobs for her own good.
Joe: I see celery with Ellery
Ben: Mercy no sir, you’ll notice it’s worser. Look closer
Joe: Looks dyin’, more like Nyren
Ben: No it has to be grosser, it's Ball.
Joe: Ah-ha! Carolyn!
Ben: (Shrieks) Exactly, sir!
Joe: (Smiles) The history of the world, my friend!
Ben: Save a lot of graves, do a lot of critics favors
Joe: Is all those favorites going up on top!
Ben: And what’s better than taking them down?
Joe: How gratifying for once to tell, that all of West High will soon be down in Hell!!!
Ben: Now, let’s see…how about Letzer?
Joe: Mmm…something leoper.
Ben: Although she was not at West, Hawks?
Joe: Lawks.
Ben: Condon?
Joe: London
Ben: Schultz?
Joe: Schmultz.
Ben: Lovely bit of (cowers at use of name ) Hanna
Joe: Maybe for banana
Ben: Let's think, we'll make it cheap, then it would be Heidi. Try Mr. Arko. Peak of his career, or lack thereof.
Joe: He looks pretty tall
Ben: Well, he was Deuteronomy, what do you expect? Played an old character though.
Joe: (Smiles) Oh, no. That wasn't Joe. That Scott Zinzer. He was not Scott. He was HOT! (Cracks laughing)
Ben: (Smiles) My apologies. Well, he ate, so much that that's why he's tall. Would hit his head on the wall.
Joe: (Laughs) The history of the world, my bud!
Ben: Try Hayworth-Weste, he tastes like chicken.
Joe: Soon enough, my lips will be lickin’!
Ben: And what about Miss Madeja, how ‘bout a stew with her in it?
Joe: And we will never ever stop.
Both: We'll drink them all down with a glass of pop!!!!!

Ben: Since Schultz doesn't satisfy you, how ‘bout Schluntz?
Joe: No, too high a voice. I think I would prefer a good lock down with Lockman.
Ben: With or without his privates? With is extra. (cackles and produces something from oven)
Joe: What’s that one?
Ben: It's Watkins. Have you ever seen her? Can't carry a voice, but perhaps she was pretty. And I’ve Just begun. Here's Mr. Herren, he's so oily he's served with a doily, want him?
Joe: No, thanks. He looks too gay and really too chim.
Ben: Try the Meyer, fried, it's dryer.
Joe: No, the Scatterday, has too much, she is a chatterday
Ben: Then Brunelle, I'm sure that's swell.
Joe: Ah, but she's nothing compared to Kruger. I'll come again when you have Botkin on the menu
Ben: Wait, we don't have Botkin yet, but will you settle for the next best thing?
Joe: What’s that?
Ben: Elizabeth Gust.
Joe: Have charity towards the world, my pal!
Ben: Yes, yes, I know, my friend.
Joe: We'll take these actors, and send them in mail!
Ben: Stuck up or not, my friend.
Joe: We'll not Just ruin the tiny or tall. No, we'll ruin all of them.
Both: I mean, all of them! And to all of them at West!!!!!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 709