The Lyrics
Hot coffee, she would always perk us,
Her name was Tydia
I met her at a dog show. she came in second
First place went to her sister, Shorty
Ah, Tydia,
She has the most glorious features,
Ever un-do-o-one..
Mae West, Roseanne, and
Barbie..
All rolled into bun
Ooooooooh
Tydia, oh Tydia
That's my plush pet, Tydia
Tydia, the fat nude lady
Just the size that I adore so
With a snore-so, even more so..
Tydia, oh Tydia, I'll never get rid a' ya'
Not even tho' you can't see your shoes,
It's tattoed, my name, on your big butt-eroos..
It keeps me in stitches, gives you black and blues
Told tattoo artist, my name was "Kick Me"
Gets kicked a lot, my Tydia..
La la la, la la la, la la la, la la la
When her robe is unclasped,
Men grow wide eyed and gasp:
"Gal, is that all you, under there?"
She takes group therapy, by herself, she, the group is,
Could fit twenty-three in her underwear...
La la la, la la la, la la la, la la la
Oh, Tydia, oh Tydia, love both ends, and the mid a' ya..
Oh, Tydia, my fat nude lady
You're a big bunch like the Brady..
In the sunlight, you're my shady..
Tydia, oh Tydia, must tell what I did ta' ya'
Sweet Tydia, my fat nude lady
On the first night we met, borrowed a truck, took you home
Made a slight little goof on your mattress of foam,
Your navel's an innie..Will took it on home..
Another good spot on Tydia..
La la la, la la la, la la la, la la la
In Monopoly, she is yours, if you pass go,
Don't stand nowhere near her, when she passes gas-tho'
Should you take her swimming, and she dives in the Amazon
Do not stand under..the side..where the dam is on..
La la la, la la la, la la la, la la la
Tydia, you are so..very amphibious
On land or water, I hump on your nibbya's
Love the way that you wiggle your lumbar
When I get you all loaded at some bar..
(whistles) La la la, la la la, la la la, la la la
Oh Tydia, oh Tydia..sometimes I just kid-a-ya
Oh Tydia, you vamp best of all
You p.o'd my dog, Rex when you ate his treet
You shake hands with legs, and make begs for the meat,
You might make me back up, but I'll not retreat..
It's you that I'll marry, Tydia..
I said, Tydia
(He said, Tydia)
They said, Tydia
(We said, Tydia)
La la !!