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Song Parodies -> "Mongrel-President Song"

Original Song Title:

"Major-General Song"

Original Performer:

Gilbert & Sullivan

Parody Song Title:

"Mongrel-President Song"

Parody Written by:

Al Silver

The Lyrics

OS is at
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president,
I hold the highest office though I'm not a native resident,
I've solved the theorems of the strings with just a broken abacus
And saved the public travel money ev'ry time I grab a bus;
I have a killer jump-shot, too, with Arne I pass and he dunkin',
I memorized the Koran: praise Allah, I passed -- not be flunkin',
I cut a dashing figure though my features are quite simian,
I'm P.C. to a fault, so I refer to babes as "womyen."

I'm very down with gangsta rap -- be woofin' with the best of 'em;
I'm partial to that flightless bird: the emu, the damn nest of 'em:
You see, in all things avian, athletic and non-resident,
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president.

I won the New York Marathon in record-breaking 2:02;
That's very speedy running, but no better than all Zulus do,
I quote the Constitution and all codicils that follow it,
But when I am prescribed a dose, I find I cannot swallow it;
My daddy's surname and my own are very much homonymous,
Still, I prefer to keep my Kenyan kinfolk all anonymous!
I gave Chicago, my home town, the present of Emanuel,
Though spewing forth obscenities is all the Rahm guy can do well.

Gun-owners driving pickups never will be in my retinue,
The moonshine-drinkin' rednecks say, "Hey, boy, we'll soon be gettin' you."
You see, in things familial, athletic, and non-resident,
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president.

Truth tell, when I know how to tell Republican from Democrat,
And don't mix up prescription drugs like cannabis and Hemocrat,
When I can tell Michelle it's getting hard for me to sample her,
Because I'm getting older and her bottom's getting ampler;
When I have seen the children's film explaining how a bill gets passed,
And show the Gen'rals I'm the Boss, and if they lie I will get brassed
You see, when I've a spine composed of hard and stiffened vertebrae
When Elephants convene, the Donkeys will sweep ev'ry turd away.

So though I will in time be doomed to impotent lame duckery,
You will not fail to see me lead, repeating the same schmuckery;
You see, in things symbolical, athletic, and non-resident,
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 2.4
How Funny: 2.4
Overall Rating: 2.4

Total Votes: 20

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   13
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

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Sickened - February 21, 2014 - Report this comment
Straight-up vile racism, deserving 1/1/1 vote legitimately. At least Obama was voted in for elected office as President twice. When have you ever served your country in office, Foul Slander, and could you do any better with the opposition party that is not only obstructionist, but is tearing itself apart with Tea Party and celebrity nutters??? I suggest you change your screen name to The New Archie Bunker.
AFW - February 21, 2014 - Report this comment
Even though, I'm a leftie-leanie...I gotta' tell ya' - this is some real snappy writing and spoofing, That "Sampler/Ampler" line was super funny!...In fact, the whole thing was written in a hilarious and lighthearted manner, not mean spirited and rude like much of the anti-Obama stuff on here....Let me say again, Congrats, for one of the best M-G's to roar down the pike in a looong time..
Tickled - February 21, 2014 - Report this comment
Sickened: If you were to write a parody, lampooning with illustrative language the ugly nature of the word "mongrel," how would you handle it with wit? Would you simply object, or would you throw the word's specifically ugly meanings back in the originator's (Nugent's) face? AFW: You got it right.
Patrick - February 21, 2014 - Report this comment
This is quite well written. Most of it, unfortunately, is true. To "Sickened": Have you ever heard any of the racist songs by Johnny Rebel (Clifford Trahan) on the Rebel label from Crowley, Louisiana. They are the most vile, racist, material ever recorded. They are also so outrageously funny that Black people laugh at them. A reflection of the times in the early 1960's when they were written, and presumably played on some Southern radio stations. Sometimes bigots are better at unintentionally lampooning themselves than they are at making fun of others.
John Jenkins - February 21, 2014 - Report this comment
Four couplets including, of course, the one that caught AFW's attention, are fantastic. The other three are "Emmanuel/can do well," "vertebrae/turd away," and "follow it/swallow it." Some of the rest of the lines seemed somewhat forced; but, all in all, a very good spoof.
N-Word Privileges - February 21, 2014 - Report this comment
See, when a black guy CALLS HIMSELF a mongrel, it's not racist because he's black. If anyone dares to quote him on that, though... RAY-CIST!
F.R. Action - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
A.S. is two sevenths of a$$hole.
Comparative Analysis - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
Politics and racism aside, this M-G parody is mediocre at best. A rhyming exercise with some good and bad lines, but ultimately another "I-did-the-Major-General-Song" (applause, please). Sorry- no thanks, I'll pass. Dr. Oliver Clozoff did it much better IMHO.
C.A. Analysis - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
"Comparative" has it right. The parody is so egregiously racist that it doesn't merit voting consideration. But IMO, it deserves a 5 for pacing (credit where credit is due, after all) and a 1 for "Funny." Averages to an overall 3--that is if it were even worth voting for.
Sam - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
I advise C.A. Analysis, Sickened, and their fellow intellectuals to avoid "Blazing Saddles," and indeed all satire, starting with Aristophanes, Swift, Mark Twain (oh, that egregious N-word), Matt Stone, and Trey Parker. How else to rebuke Nugent's remarks except expand on them to the point of ridicule?
Callmelennie - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
Anyone who thinks A-S is a right wing bigot should check out his "Right Winger's Nightmare Song" or "Every Time Rush Limbaugh Speaks" (Hint: Al doesn't get a thrill up his leg when it happens) ........ It's more than likely he's lampooning Ted Nugent in the style of Steven Colbert. Of course, if that was your intent, Al, perhaps you should drop some hint of what's going on in your mind. After all, that's what the Comment Boxes are for
Al Silver - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
Thank you, CML. Of course, that was my intent. There is no room for humor or subtlety in the hearts of P.C. Zealots or outright racists. I am in neither camp.
a.e. jones - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
Al has created a Swiftian satire. I assumed he was kidding, though I wasn't sure which Trog he was mocking. Apparently it was the cretinous Ted Nugent. Can't blame those who didn't get the joke for being offended by the ostensibly racist content. I took a similar tack a while ago when I posted four parodies full of outrageously paranoid, homophobic, misogynistic, racist content. Several commenters were justifiably appalled by said content. What was truly frightening: commenters cheering enthusiastically for it.
Al Silver - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
I make it a practice not to explain a gag, whether it be a parody or cartoon. It should stand on its own; explaining it is deadly, even though I wish The New Yorker would explain its cartoons, half of which I don't understand.
a.e.jones: Your description of your outrageously un-P.C. parodies and the positive reaction of some readers to them has me howling with laughter. I love taking pokes at the self-righteous, even knowing that there's a fine line to tread when upsetting the apple cart. (Apparently, I like mixed metaphors, too.) If you have an author page, I'm unable to find it. Is it possible for you to provide links to your four parodies?
aej - February 22, 2014 - Report this comment
Actually haven't sent in the more extreme ones yet. Maybe someday.
Phil Alexander - February 23, 2014 - Report this comment
There's a certain Poe's law in this, ISTM: "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."

..the biggest problem with this song is that there are plenty of people around saying things every bit as extreme & objectionable as this (if not more so) and meaning every word.
Onslaught - February 23, 2014 - Report this comment
Callmelennie, as a wise AIR contributor, who shall remain nameless, (cause I can't think of who, and don't want to get it wrong) once said, "No one reads the comment boxes". those here who get it, will get it, those who don't, won't, and all the explanation in the world won't help them to get it. It's a hard song to get absolutely spot on and I feel Al did a really good job of it. 5s.
Thinker - February 23, 2014 - Report this comment
Al, a good parodist has to have consideration for his entire audience and therefore attempt at least a simple explanation of complex materials. Not explaining might cause a loss of viewership and/or votes. Worse yet would be 1 votes due to misinterpretation! Explanations should not be too long nor too short, but of moderate length. Think Puritan ;-D
Al Silver - February 23, 2014 - Report this comment
Dear Puritanical Thinker: Thank you for your advice. I have, myself, thought about the issue of neither offending nor confusing anybody in my readership. The phrase that comes to mind is "appealing to the lowest common denominator." You may know who I mean: those who cannot recognize irony, hyperbole, and sarcasm, but need them to be spelled out separately, in digestible form.

If my writing is irretrievably opaque, it is because I have done a bad job and, as has been previously pointed out, NO LENGTH OF EXPLANATION WILL HELP. Explanation is "a priori" repair of a flawed work.

I do not aim for popularity or for votes, but for excellence.

Well, Pilgrim, thank you for the 1's thou hast given unto me so that I may mend my ways. Bless thee.
Patrick - February 24, 2014 - Report this comment
I've noticed that some people always seem to have a hard time recognizing satire. Having to explain it detracts from the effect.
Canine - February 24, 2014 - Report this comment
As a dog of multiple antecedents, I wish to protest that President Obama has given "mongrels" a bad name.
Dave W. - March 03, 2014 - Report this comment
Funny stuff , Al.......The big O was heard laughing in the Race House

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