-> "Mongrel-President Song"
Original Song Title:
"Major-General Song"
Parody Song Title:
"Mongrel-President Song"
The Lyrics
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president,
I hold the highest office though I'm not a native resident,
I've solved the theorems of the strings with just a broken abacus
And saved the public travel money ev'ry time I grab a bus;
I have a killer jump-shot, too, with Arne I pass and he dunkin',
I memorized the Koran: praise Allah, I passed -- not be flunkin',
I cut a dashing figure though my features are quite simian,
I'm P.C. to a fault, so I refer to babes as "womyen."
I'm very down with gangsta rap -- be woofin' with the best of 'em;
I'm partial to that flightless bird: the emu, the damn nest of 'em:
You see, in all things avian, athletic and non-resident,
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president.
I won the New York Marathon in record-breaking 2:02;
That's very speedy running, but no better than all Zulus do,
I quote the Constitution and all codicils that follow it,
But when I am prescribed a dose, I find I cannot swallow it;
My daddy's surname and my own are very much homonymous,
Still, I prefer to keep my Kenyan kinfolk all anonymous!
I gave Chicago, my home town, the present of Emanuel,
Though spewing forth obscenities is all the Rahm guy can do well.
Gun-owners driving pickups never will be in my retinue,
The moonshine-drinkin' rednecks say, "Hey, boy, we'll soon be gettin' you."
You see, in things familial, athletic, and non-resident,
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president.
Truth tell, when I know how to tell Republican from Democrat,
And don't mix up prescription drugs like cannabis and Hemocrat,
When I can tell Michelle it's getting hard for me to sample her,
Because I'm getting older and her bottom's getting ampler;
When I have seen the children's film explaining how a bill gets passed,
And show the Gen'rals I'm the Boss, and if they lie I will get brassed
You see, when I've a spine composed of hard and stiffened vertebrae
When Elephants convene, the Donkeys will sweep ev'ry turd away.
So though I will in time be doomed to impotent lame duckery,
You will not fail to see me lead, repeating the same schmuckery;
You see, in things symbolical, athletic, and non-resident,
I am a multi-marvel of a mongrel U.S. president.
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 2.4 | |
How Funny: | 2.4 | |
Overall Rating: | 2.4 | |
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Total Votes: | 20 |
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| | | | Pacing | | | How Funny | | | Overall Rating | |
| 1 | | 13 | |
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| 2 | | 0 | |
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| 3 | | 0 | |
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| 4 | | 0 | |
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| 5 | | 7 | |
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