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Song Parodies -> "The MRSA Song"

Original Song Title:

"The Major-General's Song"

Original Performer:

Gilbert and Sullivan

Parody Song Title:

"The MRSA Song"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Tommy Turtle "challenged" me to come up with something for MRSA in its "uncontracted" form (and he didn't mean lying around hospitals waiting to be caught)...

I've given a couple of "stress guides" to help in the scansion: it works pretty well, IMO
METHicillin-RESistant staPHYLLococcus aureus
Has an effect in hospitals that's really quite notorious
Just as patients think they're getting better, oops! they take a dive
And don't it make you wonder just how anyone gets out alive
It's not a foreign import like some infectious exotica
And broadly ain't affected by broad-spec' antibiotica
It's gen'rally accepted that it's brought in by folks visiting
Who aren't at all concerned about bacteria they're depositing

They're not at all concerned about bacteria they're depositing
No, not at all concerned about bacteria they're depositing
How silly: unconcerned about bacteria they're depositing

The answer is quite simple, and it ain't at all heretical
It's simply be hygienic in all sorts of places, medical
So please ensure you wash your hands, although it's quite laborious
If you don't want meth-RESistant staPHYLLococcus aureus

So please ensure you wash your hands, although it's quite laborious
If you don't want meth-RESistant staPHYLLococcus aureus


So next time you're in hospital, in plaster or in plastocene
I hope you're gonna practise hy- or maybe even higher-giene
And wash and clean and scrub up to the best of your ability
To make sure you have manual and digital sterility
What I'm saying's common-sense: don't look at me so sceptical
For hospital environments should really be aseptical
To banish bugs's breeding grounds - yes wouldn't it be glorious
No METHicillin-RESistant staPHYLLococcus aureus

No methicillin-resistant staphyllococcus aureus
No methicillin-resistant staphyllococcus aureus
No methicillin-resistant staphyllococcus aureus

I'm prematurely finishing my little (if bizarre) essay
On practical prevention of that nasty bug MRSA
So practise proper hygiene or the docs'll get censorious
On METHicillin-RESistant staPHYLLococcus aureus

So practise proper hygiene or the docs'll get censorious
On METHicillin-RESistant staPHYLLococcus aureus

OK.. so I left a verse out, but I realized I kept repeating myself. If you're that worried, sing the first verse twice :-)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   1
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 4   1
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 5   12
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User Comments

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John Barry - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Brilliant, Phil!
Red Ant - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Infectious little ditty here and great turn around time my friend
Tommy Turtle's challenge has been met on this o-CA-si-an
And though what I'm about to say is anything but glamourous
I wish I could do these Generals like Phil Alexander does

...or something like that. ;-)
TT - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
My prediction at the time if issuing this challenge (bottom of "If You Don't Want Hepatits", http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/traditional1076.shtml) was:
"Good Lord willin', persistent pal Phil will rock us, not bore-ee us",
and PA does not disappoint. Clearly, there is nothing - NOTHING - that is beyond the perspicacity of AmIRighters!

Top marks just for "scansion" (cool word!); not to mention "higher-giene". RX: Narrowly-targeted antibiotic, "5" cc T.I.D. Haematologically (i. e., "bloody") well done, old chap. Next pint's on me.
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
"I hope you're gonna practise hy- or maybe even higher-giene"! :-)

I'm in the mood for strange puns today so additional to that line I'd say a KISS without Hygiene Simmons would not be the same.
Agrimorfee - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
No qualms whatsoever about missing the verse. 555
alvin rhodes - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
shakes head in amazement....the stuff you write makes me think of my stuff as "dick and jane"...5s plus
Phil Alexander - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
I'd have thought that "Dick and Jane" stuff was more the preserve of whatfreaks, Alvin ;-)
Hygiene Simmons? Hmm... I've made love to ten thousand women, but washed my hands afterwards..
Anyway, thanks guys: I've had a bit of a lean patch the last couple of weeks... no good ideas to speak of. So this was a nice mental work-out to keep the mental gears turning: my only other recent idea is to a song my father wrote (so there may be a few DKTOSs if I do get round to posting it). But time seems so short these days...
PMS - March 16, 2006 - Report this comment
555 CC's of funny. Especially liked "higher-giene". Purell genious!
Larry Hensley - March 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Very amazing parody, 5s

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