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Song Parodies -> "I've Made An Airfix Model of a Supermarine Harrier"

Original Song Title:

"The Major-General's Song"

Original Performer:

Gilbert and Sullivan

Parody Song Title:

"I've Made An Airfix Model of a Supermarine Harrier"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

After realizing yesterday that I'd parodied "Yesterday" ten times, but this song only nine, I figured it was worth doing another one. No idea where the inspiration came from, though. I can remember a time when I thought three parodies of one song was enough...
I've made an Airfix model of a Supermarine Harrier
It sits upon the deck of one enormous model carrier
Another one is on the run-way - if you think that weasel-ly
It's a model: VTOL in plastic don't come easily
Not quite so big, a model frig-ate anchored by the cupboard door
Forget the clothes inside of those 'cause they don't open any more
Got a destroyer, quite a toy, although it isn't drastic fun:
And when I try "Minesweeper" I prefer to use a plastic one

Oh, yes, when he will play mineswee-per he will use a plastic one
It brings him glee, playing mineswee-per with a real plastic one
Euph'misticly he'll play "mineswee-per" with his little plastic one

So much to make, can't take a break, you may have seen the last of me
My birthday treat was a whole fleet - more plastic than the cast of Glee
There's little bits of airfix kits scattered around the whole damn place
I should have said that my whole bedroom models Plymouth Naval Base

Don't step on bits of airfix kits as you go walking round his place
Security is tight, you see, in model Plymouth Naval Base

I haven't seen my submarine in weeks - it must be underway
Has left the shore, across the floor twixt carpet and the underlay
The cute machine can go unseen, its movements leave me unawares
Oh, what a dope! The periscope is on the landing by the stairs
My battleship is on a trip to Bathroom via Eiderdown
Its guns are trained upon the plains of Bedspread and all wider round
And my Corvette (that isn't red) is battling HMS Hood
I tried to float torpedo boats in bathwater, they sank.. not good

He tried to float torpedo boats in bathwater - it wasn't good
We shouldn't gloat - torpedo boats in bathwater is never good
We shouldn't gloat - they didn't float in bathwater.. as if they could

My girlfriend, nay - my fiancée - came over for a swift embrace
I show where I spend all my time affixing plastic bits in place
I take my sweetie through my fleet, I know that I must carry her
So she don't slip upon a ship or trip over my Harrier

He'll lift his girl VTOL and then he'll try to carry her
And if he fails he may impale his girlfriend on his harrier

Alas! I caught my foot on what I thought should have been empty space
I clipped a ship and tripped, then slipped and fell on models every place
I got a bruise from where my cruiser hit me on my upper thigh
And start to bleed as my torpedo boat shot me right in the eye
My rear end fat'll flatten battleships I end up end-up on
Minesweeper, floor.. well, no high score and that you can depend upon
My battle fleet once sweet a feat of construction, now more a-bashed
Alas, no ardour: more Pearl Harbour.. Tora! Tora! Tora! crash!

Oh, no, no ardour, more Pearl Harbour Tora! Tora! Tora! crash!
That's right, it seems an Iwo Jima Tora! Tora! Tora! crash!
No chance of ardour as Pearl Harbour Tora! Tora! Tora! crash!

I'm sad to say my fiancée fell on my aircraft carrier
A bad mistake, I guess she'll ache from my attempt to carry her
A wee small voice says I've no choice: I'll damn well have to marry her
As I with tact try to extract my little model Harrier

We'll sing with voice: he's got no choice, he'll damn well have to marry her
We think he's cracked trying to extract his little model Harrier

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - March 18, 2011 - Report this comment
Phil - I meant no implied criticism about using Yesterday. This is something else...a "model" work for us all. I hope you don't feel "Harried" after such a demanding work! ;D
Phil Alexander - March 18, 2011 - Report this comment
I didn't take it as criticism, so much as a valid comment (and I figured throwing out another one to this OS wouldn't take too long. About an hour's worth of writing, in the end - I like this OS :-)
John Barry - March 18, 2011 - Report this comment
As far as I'm concerned you can never parody a song too many times.
WarrenB - March 18, 2011 - Report this comment
Dave W. - March 18, 2011 - Report this comment
Hey Phil, Seems like everytime I dial the "Department of Inspiration" , I get a busy signal......Your 10th is most excellent indeed !
Phil Alexander - March 19, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks, all :-)

JB - Three hundred and how many? I make it you're near the top 20 submissions for "I put a spell on you" alone :-)
Susanna Viljanen - March 20, 2011 - Report this comment
My hubby is a member of IPMS, so he really knows what this is about. An un-Revelling work with your Monogram really stamped on.

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