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Song Parodies -> "When Upgrading Windows"

Original Song Title:

"When I'm Cleaning Windows"

Original Performer:

George Formby

Parody Song Title:

"When Upgrading Windows"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

To be sung with a Lancashire accent, a smile and a ukulele
I'm upgrading Windows for some ungrateful slob
For a true professional it's an irritating job,
It's a job I cannot shirk
But here's what really starts to irk
Is all the things that just don't work
When upgrading Windows

There's honey on the keyboard too
Could really do with something new
The mouse is full of yucky goo
When upgrading Windows

The old hard disk is nearly full, I need another one
I'll keep adding memory until it starts to run

I don't think this'll go too quick
There's no CD, I'll have to pick
Install from the floppy diSk
When upgrading Windows

The graphics card don't want to play
It only works in VGA
It's time the thing was thrown away
When upgrading Windows

3Com support is _the_ worst yet
Just how stupid can you get
Get modem drivers off the net?
When upgrading Windows

The old hard disk is nearly full, I need another one
I'll keep adding memory until it starts to run

The motherboard takes 1-meg SIMMs
With, stops to count it, 30-pins
I need to fit a hundred in
When upgrading Windows

Expansion slots are I.S.A.
No PCI here anyway
So much for plug and f*****g play
When upgrading Windows

It's just as well the upgrade's free
Though not thought out too sensibly
3.1 up to XP?
When upgrading Windows

The old hard disk is nearly full, I need another one
I'll keep adding memory until it starts to run

Now the hard disk won't detect
I should have shown it more respect
The motherboard is f*****g wrecked
When upgrading Windows
When upgrading Windows
When upgrading Windows

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 44

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   3
 4   8
 5   32

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Mr. Horse - October 19, 2003 - Report this comment
Hahaha....great one Phil. Just happened to read up some of your stuff and ran into this one...Good Job, man...
Phil Alexander - October 20, 2003 - Report this comment
This one's been up for nearly two years now - don't time fly? It's one of two "When I'm Cleaning Windows" parodies I've written - and I've only just realised that I've never submitted the other (I've been singing that one for ten years or more... must send it in). Anyway, Mr Horse, thanks for being the first to comment on an old, old parody :-)
Karl - December 16, 2003 - Report this comment
I'd like to be the second person to comment on this genius work, truly marvellous. Had so many problems with windows and Bill Gates constantly blocking my progress at every turn with anything and everything computer related that your parody couldn't help but make me smile. Bravo.
Phil Alexander - December 17, 2003 - Report this comment
Thank you Karl... I quite like this one, too :-) Seeing as you liked it so much, could I presume upon you to, er, VOTE FOR IT as well?
Deleter - March 29, 2004 - Report this comment
"Sad" and "nearness to life" are synonyms to "funny" at this site. ;-)
Phil Alexander - March 29, 2004 - Report this comment
When it comes to Windows-bashing, yep. But seriously, there are some very funny lines in this one - at least, they get some laughs when I sing it.
Steven Cavanagh - November 28, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm also amazed that others know this song! Loved it.
Phil Alexander - November 29, 2004 - Report this comment
It's surprisingly well-known this side of the pond, or at least known *about* - most people have heard of George Formby, and know the refrain of "When I'm Cleaning Windows", even if it takes someone as sad as me to know *all* the words ;-)
Gav Powell - July 16, 2005 - Report this comment
You reviewed my debut song parody before anyone else so thought i'd give you a look. This is brilliant, as is your Palmer parody. Kudos sir, Kudos I say!
Sister Amnesia - May 29, 2007 - Report this comment
Always look out for any new additions from you but love this!

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