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Song Parodies -> "The Flag Is At Half-Staff Again"

Original Song Title:

"Back In The Saddle Again"

Original Performer:

Gene Autry

Parody Song Title:

"The Flag Is At Half-Staff Again"

Parody Written by:

Patrick McWilliams

The Lyrics

Walking into the library today, I saw a familiar sight.
The Flag is at half-staff again
When will this killing spree end?
Watch the shooting victims bleed
On a live-stream Facebook feed
Flag flies at half-staff again

Killer deranged once more
Hoping to even the score
There's a shooting every night
And they don't know wrong from right
The flag is at half-staff again

You could die you know
Bullets high and low
Someone just killed your best friend
What more can I say
Can't run away
Back in the crosshairs again

Will lives ever matter again?
Greet everyone as a friend
Or will terrorists run free
Taking aim at you and me?
Back in the headlines again

Cycle repeating once more
Corpses stacked up by the score
There are speeches every night
No solution is in sight
Marching in protest again

Buildings old and new
Lit in rainbow hue
Making a gesture again
Politicians say
Can't find a away
Flag flies at half-staff again

In the aftermath of the shooting in Orlando, Florida, the Union Station and Bond Bridge in Kansas City were illuminated with rainbow colored lights. A gesture which I am sure will deter future mass killers.

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Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   9
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   9

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Barry J. Mitchel - July 13, 2016 - Report this comment
The OS is very appropriate for this topic, especially lines like "Totin' my old 44" and "Out where a friend is a friend" but the 44 is still necessary for protection against outlaws. Patrick, I like the way you varied the "chorus" and brought new thoughts to every stanza. The only pacing fixes I would suggest are to change "The flag files" to "Flags fly", "repeating" to "repeats" and "a away" to "any way" near the end. Was the last a typo?
Barry J. Mitchel - July 13, 2016 - Report this comment
Oops! I meant to suggest changing "The flag is" to "Flags are" in the title and first line.
Dr Giorgio Coniglio dec - July 13, 2016 - Report this comment
Not rainbow lights, but I infer that some other partly -effective measures should be applied. The 2nd line of your song might make a good title. 5s
Rob Arndt - July 13, 2016 - Report this comment
Patrick, if the police in the 21st century haven't eliminated robbery, burglary, looting, arson, assault, etc... given all the high tech weapons, support, and 24/7 surveillance boosted by fantastic forensic advances... how will anyone stop gun violence? In Israel, the Palis use guns, knives, even cars to kill Jews. A gun is just an object. The gunman pulls the trigger. And no way the police can read minds of someone who either loses his mind or goes ISIS lone wolf in a day. We can bolster funding for mental services, but unless that person seeks it, it won't work. Monitoring people through "See it, report it" is also not a good idea. One nation that used that method gave us the Gestapo and Stasi! Basically, you get one half the population spying on the other half. We have 24 Intel services in the US, but still lack the manpower and hours to track suspected terrorists. It's a no-win situation. The nature of man is evil. These attacks will continue. Regarding racism: never been worse and under the first Black President. Say what you want critics, gun sales have gone up tremendously under Obama. If Hillary gets elected new records will be set as even minorities are arming up! Oh, and 555 for the parody!
Patrick - July 13, 2016 - Report this comment
Perhaps i was thinking of "the flag" as a general symbol rather than a collection of physical flags at various locations. At least that is as good an explanation as any. If you want to record it, take your pick. "a way" VS "any way". My copy of the OS gave me only 4 syllables. There is a long tradition of investigative reporters checking into mental hospitals to uncover abuses. States began to cut funding and confinement was replaced with outpatient drug regimes. Which only work when the patient takes his medicine. Many of these drugs produce unpleasant side effects so a lot of people give up. Of course, the shooters in Orlando and Dallas, while they might be regarded as "insane" were fully conscious of what they were doing and in control of their actions. Nothing can stop such attacks short of arming all potential victims. Thanks for all the comments.
Dr. Pangloss - July 13, 2016 - Report this comment
As one who has tried to ridicule racism with faux-racist parodies, I find this parody bland, and relieved only by an appropriate pessimism. (Even that big capon Gene Autry was bland and sang in a nasal voice.) Nevertheless, it's a well-executed kind of eulogy. I wish, for the sake of cred, that you weren't a seller of guns. At the very least, they're symbolic of violence. At the very most, especially in their semi-automatic form, they equip garden-variety murderers with the means to raise their game to genocide.
I don't believe that "the nature of man is evil." Sounds too much like original sin. "A gun is just an object"? Some object! I'll go you one better, Rob. A newly-conceived human embryo is just an object. As for racism being putatively worse under Obama, what is your point, Rob? Racism, which is a long-term, deeply-held, inculcated bias went to a suddenly higher new level when Obama was inaugurated? Ridiculous!
Brown is the new white. Mixed race is becoming the norm. The binary view of race will disappear as physical differences blur. At present, whites look upon this demographic change as a threat. We'll get used to it. So the solution to racism is empirical. In the fullness of time -- no race, no racism.
Rob Arndt - July 13, 2016 - Report this comment
Dear Dr. let's analyze your opinions one at a time. You say guns are symbolic of violence. Not to me and the majority of gun owners, police, and military. Historically, guns have put supper on the table, have secured borders, brought outlaws to justice, and defended nations from aggressors, plus much more regarding personal defence. And yes, any gun is an object. Can it fire itself? No. You cannot compare it with new life in the womb unless you ask a police officer, soldier, or a survivor of violence what a gun meant to them to save lives, many times their own as well as others. You say you don't believe in original sin. That's fine, you are a free moral agent. I disagree and so does most of mankind under the three top religions which are all monotheistic. You go on to state that Obama has no part in race relations. Quite the contrary, especially to the PC liberal crowd that elected him and Blacks who perceive him as the Black Messiah for America. He promised many things, delivered on some but epically failed on others. Some percentage of the White despises him no doubt and this in turn creates friction with various communities that try to shield him from any criticism. Black folks in these last two terms of his Administration feel left out, still struggling with a lack of jobs that leads to community strife and criminal activity. The police in those communities don't feel safe or worse- feel threatened by Black frustration. This in turn leads to violent confrontation on both sides, pitting one against the other as the nation watches live on TV regularly and which forces them to take sides. And so on. As for the demographic shifts in America, that has always been expected as melting pot but is now undermined by a foreign element which this Christian-identified nation never expected. Muslims mixed with radical versions of Islam that are indeed PART of Islam and the Quran as embraced by ISIS and their affiliates. Muslims are more of a future threat than brown skin. Ponder that. As for me, I am White, Republican, a hawk, and feel we live in the last times prior to judgement of this world. I make no apologies. Btw, since Cain killed Abel has the world become a better place for all of mankind? No, it is a world dominated by evil. There are so many bad things happening now that there is no longer a need for Christianity to warn of impending doom. You can watch it all day on CNN!
Joseph Watanabe - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
"Christian-identified nation"? Hell, no! Not by this non-Christian who is just as American as you or anyone else. This is a country where every individual counts. I've been reading this website. My great-grandparents came here before your family. You call yourself German. I don't call myself Japanese. Melting pot undermined by a foreign element? A hundred years ago, before your kin immigrated here, your people were not only the foreign element but perceived as closer to the enemy than today's Muslims. They were called krauts. Btw, 75 years ago my people were "Japs." So much for blanket demonization!
The PC liberal crowd elected Obama? Must be an awful lot of them to win 2 elections by both popular and electoral votes.
Don't tell me about the down-home, log cabin history of the firearm. When was the last time you went a-huntin' possum in downtown Sacramento to put food on the table fer the young uns? When was the last time Chicken Hawk defended Christendom's borders with his Springfield?
Excuse me now. Rev. Don Lemon is on CNN reading Revelation.
Rob Arndt - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Let's see... 83% of Americans identify as Christians in 2016. I'd say that's a clear majority. Second, my family came here in the German immigration wave in the late 19th century (second to the Italians at 4 million and greater than the Polish and Irish numbers that built this nation along with the original British subjects forming the 5 pillars of European origin ). I see no great Japanese immigration wave. In terms of Asians, you aren't anywhere near the Chinese, Koreans, and Vietnamese. And may I remind you that the greatest single ethnic majority since the 1990 Census is German-American? One out of every 5. Regarding firearms you took my historical account out of context with hunting, but at least I have gone hunting. Germans are natural hunters unlike the Japanese. And I wouldn't brag about voting for a President who more than doubled the national debt in two terms from $9 Trillion to $20 Trillion and growing. A President who lied about ACA as many individuals and families lost their primary healthcare doctors and had their premiums skyrocket. A President who not only can't beat ISIS, but won't even acknowledge radical Islam. A President who has weakened our armed forces to the point that up to 50% of our main weapon systems are in need of critical maintenance and repair or are not fit for action. A President that courts Communist Cuba and Shia terror-sponsor Iran. A President that threatens Israel's future. A President who has Democrats that hate him too and will be glad to see him leave. But if you like a paltry 1.4% economic growth rate with two income Middle Class families struggling paycheck -to-paycheck... that's on you. At this point, you probably want to consult your dead ancestors for a reply!!!
Joseph Watanabe - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
An extended rant about the President's record has nothing to do with the subjects of the parody, which are gun violence and race. Now, even if 99.999% of Americans identify as Christians, that does not make this a Christian-identified nation. The Constitution and its judical interpretation decree separation of Church and State, and that would be for the protection of the .001%. Your idea of religion and the State is, ironically, the law of Shariah.
Joseph Watanabe - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Who cares how many immigrants came from which country? All you proved is that millions of Germans were itching to escape from the Fatherland. "Germans are natural hunters unlike the Japanese." What does that mean? Is it good or bad?
As long as you're doing numbers, I just looked this up: Germans in Germany have an average I.Q. of 99. Japanese in Japan have an average I.Q. of 105.
Jean Shepherd - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
I can picture Rob hunting: sitting in his cellar, shooting rats with his Red Ryder air rifle, scarfing down Yankee Doodles, and watching Adult Swim out of the corner of his eye.
Rob Arndt - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
@JW, the IQ stats vary by research report. Another site claims 102 and so on. Means nothing. My IQ is 145. And as for fleeing the Fatherland or any European nation was due largely in the 19th century to starvation, politics, depression circumstances, poverty, failure of general reforms, and disease. Germany unified during this time period, beat France in the Franco-Prussian War, advanced arms, and became the most powerful land army by 1900 with the Kaiser building a rival fleet to challenge the RN. Nothing you say means anything as Japan by comparison was still living in feudal world until forced by the West to open its ports at gunpoint and a tiny win over the Slavs. Try harder.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Strange thing is they make such bloody good cameras.
? - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Ever hear of Leica?
Patrick - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
I wasn't aware my parody was about race, so much as about violence. But race does play a significant part in the endemic violence that afflicts our country. It is the lowest common denominator to which politicians can appeal. Divide and conquer. The transcendent ideologies of Christianity, Marxism, Democracy are all yielding to tribalism. The only transnational belief still ascendant today is Islam. From what I can determine, my Irish ancestors likely came here to escape famine and poverty. Some fought against the Union during the War of the Rebellion. If one reads the story of conscription in Europe during the 19th Century it is obvious that many immigrants came to America to liberate themselves from the prospect of a lifetime of military servitude. I did sell guns as a part time job. I enjoy shooting on the rare occasions when I can find a safe place to do so. I don't hunt, and never really enjoyed it. I would like to ask those who want to disarm the American public just how they would go about doing so? This is the "line in the sand" issue for many. Ironically the only way to even attempt such a thing would be by enlisting hordes of men armed with automatic weapons to risk their lives in the process. I wish I knew the answer. But it is painfully obvious that no government that we're likely to get will have it either.
Joseph Watanabe - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Patrick, certainly nobody on this thread has advocated seizing guns from the citizenry. That is unconstitutional, so one need not argue that it's a fool's errand. But gun regulation has been allowed by SCOTUS in Heller. That is well within the power of a rational government free from the moneyed thrall of the N.R.A. However, racism and gun-ism are America's two social fault lines. They appear to be intractable, but we should never give up the fight.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
@? -- Of course I've heard of Leica, you interrogative twit. See me at
Jenny - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
I'm so sick and tired of hearing the N.R.A. spout off about Second Amendment rights when it clearly reads "a well-maintained militia." That was the original intent. Well, we have one already, the National Guard who are valid citizen soldiers. Normal people regardless of criminal background checks should NEVER be allowed to own war weapons meant for a battleground or guns equal to what cops carry. Those weapons have killed countless innocent people. There is no longer a need to even use them for food as we have more than adequate supermarkets. Recreational shooting is just a cover used by the N.R.A. to allow citizens access to assault weapons under various guises. What the hell does anyone need an assault rifle like the AR-15 for? To patrol their backyard? Guard their home? From whom, the ATF or Police? Stop pretending guns don't kill people. They DO everyday ! Let's get rid of them for the sake of our children which are our future. Gun ownership is gun violence waiting to happen.
Patrick - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Armed citizens precede the militia. The right to bear arms makes the militia possible. The National Guard did not exist until the 20th Century, and then as a reserve component of the federal standing army, an institution the founders feared and took pains to restrict. The National Guard was formed to eliminate State militias not to be the militia. When it takes 20+ years to execute the ! in !00 murderers who is actually sentenced to death, then the government does not take murder seriously. Gun control is the power elite saying they are afraid the public will finally have had enough of their corruption and will rebel. The dead bodies piling up on the streets of Chicago and other cities don't matter a damn to them. There are already laws against such behavior and they are not enforced. The founders intended for the public to be equally armed as the military. Again, this was the policy until the 1930's. The 1934 National Firearms Act was passed out of fear of unemployed WWI veterans following the path of the Freikorps in Germany, not, as you have been taught, because of the Tommy-gun toting gangsters of the by then defunct Prohibition era.
Joseph Watanabe - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
National Guard reservists serve both the federal government and the various states. The state National Guard is organized into units stationed in each of the 50 states. Its members usually hold full-time civilian jobs. Sounds to me like a militia, which should have a unique right to bear arms. You don't need to own a machine gun to become a member of the National/State Guard. You do need training.
When it takes many years to execute a defenseless alleged murderer, it shows that the government takes due process seriously. If you want summary executions, with the bonus of having them public, become a subject of the kingdom of our ally Saudi Arabia.
The power élite, who ultimately control the most lethal armed force in world history, have more to fear from an informed public voting in fair elections than they do from the peasants with their torches, pitchforks, and rifles. The dumbing down of culture, bibles in the classroom, denial of evolution and climate change, etc., are the real weapons of the power élite.
Common sense - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
^ Warning: Extreme Left-wing nutcase propaganda and paranoia last comment. Evolution and Climate Change are theories, not facts. And Gee, when religion and discipline were in schools the pupils were better off. What has taking God out done? Now kids have to wear uniforms, go through metal detectors, carry backpacks, and worry about being beaten, bullied, cyber-bullied, assaulted, raped, and murdered. As far as guns go, Patrick is right. We the people have a fundamental right to bear arms to challenge any tyrannical, out of control, and repressive government. The militia of old was not funded and was not subjected to being used by the state or federal government. The National Guard therefore doesn't count. It is funded and uses military units. A militia is unfunded and non-military. In other words, it is irregular, usually not organized nor trained as well as military personnel. It's an army of private citizens.
Uncommon Man - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Definition of an unfunded, non-military, irregular, unorganized, untrained, armed cadre with military weapons: A street gang. You want to fight repression and tyranny? Call on our finest private citizens, the Crips or Bloods. As for the rest of the "Common Sense" idiocy, it must be a parody or something. The period 2000 through 2014 had the top 13 hottest years globally since record keeping began. Was this reported by theoretical scientists using theoretical instruments? Yeah, you wrote a parody of righty talk. Nobody can be that stupid!
Get real - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Account for the polar vortex than buried the eastern seaboard recently and even reached the south with tens of feet of snow. Account for the real reports of Artic and Antarctic ice getting thicker, reaching farther and how the polar bear population is moving up, not down. Account for all that time before industrialization, greenhouse gases, and carbon emissions when the earth went through similar hot/cold temp extremes. So??? All you are is a global alarmist who advances absurd theories that are either unproven or refuted.
Uncommon Man - July 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Dispatch to the right wing echo chamber: Arctic sea ice is getting much thinner. This past spring, new data from the European Space Agency's CryoSat 2 satellite shows the ice cover stretching across the Arctic Ocean is, on average, 15 percent thinner than it was last year at the same time. Thinner ice is more easily broken by wind and waves and melts more quickly, intensifying concerns about a potential new record low this year.
Polar bears depend on the sea ice surface to efficiently catch their seal prey. A shorter duration of ice cover over their productive hunting areas means less opportunity to hunt. A reduction in sea ice has been statistically linked to reduced stature and weight in polar bears and to lower survival rates of cubs. Reports of an increasing polar bear population is today's myth which is probably data from wildlife preservation efforts in the '70s.
The polar vortex is a prevailing wind pattern that circles the Arctic, flowing from west to east all the way around the Earth. It normally keeps extremely cold air bottled up toward the North Pole. Occasionally, though, the vortex weakens, allowing the cold air to pour down across Canada into the U.S., or down into other regions such Eastern Europe. In addition to bringing cold, the air mass can push the jet stream—the band of wind that typically flows from the Pacific Ocean across the U.S.—much further south as well. If the jet stream puts up a fight, the moisture it carries can fall out as heavy snow, which atmospheric scientists say is the circumstance that caused the February 2010 “snowmageddon” storm that shut down Washington, D.C. But why does the vortex weaken? More and more Arctic sea ice is melting during summer months. The more ice that melts, the more the Arctic Ocean warms. The ocean radiates much of that excess heat back to the atmosphere in winter, which disrupts the polar vortex. Data taken over the past decade indicate that when a lot of Arctic sea ice disappears in the summer, the vortex has a tendency to weaken over the subsequent winter, if related atmospheric conditions prevail over the northern Atlantic Ocean. Although the extent of summer sea ice in the Arctic varies year to year, overall it has been disappearing to a notable degree since 2007 and it is forecast to continue to vanish even further. That could mean more trouble for the polar vortex, and more frigid outbreaks—a seeming contradiction to “global warming,” perhaps, but not for “global weirding,” also known as climate change.
Any questions, Stupid?
Reply to UM - July 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Uncommon Man - July 15, 2016 - Report this comment
I will answer one of the ten glib statements in the link provided, which is the increase in Antarctic sea ice:
Currently, the effect of greenhouse gases is being overshadowed by other local climate phenomena. By far the biggest impact has been the ozone hole. The depletion of the ozone layer above Antarctica during the last century by emissions of chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs) has caused an overall cooling effect on the Antarctic continent. Ozone itself is a greenhouse gas and its reduction has seen more heat reflecting back into space. Although the ozone hole has begun to show the first signs of recovery, levels are still significantly reduced. The loss of ozone is probably the second largest human impact on global climate after carbon dioxide.
One of the effects of ozone loss on the Antarctic has been the increasing frequency and ferocity of winds and storms around the continent. Ozone depletion has caused winds in the Southern Ocean to increase by 15-20%. In particular, the cooling trend may have caused a low pressure system in the Amundsen sea to increase in intensity or frequency. This vortex sucks air from the frozen inside of the continent and it rushes out over the Ross Sea to the west. This is where 80% of Antarctica’s ice expansion has occurred.
Keep in mind that the ozone hole is closing and that the natural greenhouse effect of ozone will eventually eliminate the cooling of Antarctica. It is then that the warming effect of the carbon dioxide, produced by human activity, will begin to melt the southern ice cover.
Debunker - July 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Uncommon Man - July 15, 2016 - Report this comment
To Debunker: The link has led to the Friends of Science website. In 2006, The Globe and Mail reported that FOS has taken undisclosed sums from Alberta oil and gas interests. The money was funneled through the Calgary Foundation, to the University of Calgary and on to the FOS though something called the “Science Education Fund." It seems the FOS has taken a page right out of the US climate change attack group’s playbook: funnel money through foundations and third party groups to “wipe the oil” off the dollars they receive. This comes as no surprise considering the FOS has been linked to some of the most notorious oil money-backed scientists in the US, including Drs. S. Fred Singer, Sallie Baliunas, Sherwood Idso, Willie Soon, Robert C. Balling and Pat Michaels.
No more links. If you have something to say about climate change, write a parody.
Not all scientists agree - July 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Uncommon Man - July 15, 2016 - Report this comment
You link suppliers are lazy. Have the integrity to put the results of your even-handed research into writing -- preferably parody. Btw, have your buddy Rob, your fellow climate change denier, tell you all about the reliability of Wikipedia.
Rich Troll - July 15, 2016 - Report this comment
You climate change deniers are nuts. What if climate change is real? Looks like you're willing to gamble. I'm not. I see it as an opportunity. Six years ago I founded a solar panel manufacturing and installation company serving the private home market. I'm a job creator. I'm good for the economy and the environment. If you're fracking, piping oil, etc., I'm a disrupter and proud of it. I can't write parodies. Too busy making money anyway.
Sarah Palindrome - July 16, 2016 - Report this comment
Deniers reined.
Henny Pun-man - July 17, 2016 - Report this comment
Deniers reign
@Henny - July 17, 2016 - Report this comment
if that's a palindrome what does ngiers reined mean? sounds like you're a racist or an idiot. which is it?
Henny Pun-man - July 18, 2016 - Report this comment
Now take this straw man utilizing troll, please. Where in my screen name do I claim that I'm doin palindromes. But that's typical of them, aint it? Create a false argument which proves that other side is stupid, which proves that they're right.
Henny Pun-man - July 18, 2016 - Report this comment
And while I have your attention, take the way @Henny insinuates that I'm a racist. Apparently when I used the word "reign" I was fully aware that its kinda sorta quasi-palindrome is sort of in the same ballpark as the word for our African American citizenry which must not be spoken ........ Wow, this smear merchant has talent. You really should get a job at the Ministry of Truth, my friend
@Henny - July 18, 2016 - Report this comment
reign? like a king or queen? sounds like you want a return to monarchy too. reign has n, i, g, e, r but you scramble them. dog whistle, dog whistle. how many other words are code, like reign? pure racist invention. the g is silent. so who needs it? and the ei. like in ceiling? so the word should be reen. the ministry of truth is gonna heer about this.
Henny Pun-man's Wife - July 18, 2016 - Report this comment
Take me. Please.
Get a clue - July 18, 2016 - Report this comment
Niger is a nation. Not the N-word or Nigga.
Serbian - July 18, 2016 - Report this comment
Hey, Get a clue (if that's your real name), in my country the N-word is "niger." We're a poor country and we can't afford to waste g's. You have a problem with that? As they say in Serbia, Да Бог добио гљивице на јајима/Da Bog dobio gljivice na jajima - I hope you get fungus on your balls.
Steadfast - July 19, 2016 - Report this comment
^ needs to go back to his country, this is America, you fool. You sound as retarded as the people who confuse necro with negro. One means dead while the other means black. Btw, Serbians are pond scum. Got their asses kicked in the Balkans.
Serbian - July 19, 2016 - Report this comment
@ Steadfast: You spelled your own name wrong. It's Deadlast.
Etaoin Shrdlu - July 19, 2016 - Report this comment
Some people around here, like "Get a clue" and "Steadfast" are just too dull to know when they're being kidded.
@Serbian - July 19, 2016 - Report this comment
Go lick some Russian boot.
Patrick - July 19, 2016 - Report this comment
How do you insert Cyrillic text into your comments? I'd like to be able to do that.
Serbian - July 19, 2016 - Report this comment
First of all, you might ask why I call myself a Serbian instead of a Serb. It sounds a lot like W. calling people from Greece "Grecians." Well, sir, a Serb is a member of an ethnic group; a Serbian is a citizen of Serbia, and I prefer that. Now to your question: It's easy. You just цопy анд пасте.

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