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Song Parodies -> "You'll Never Get A Loan"

Original Song Title:

"You'll Never Walk Alone"

Original Performer:

From Broadway Show, 'Carousel'

Parody Song Title:

"You'll Never Get A Loan"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

When you walk in the bank
Hold your chin up high
And show confidence,
Have that spark..
In a small cubicle
Sits a cross eyed guy
With the keys for
Your new car to park..

As questions occur
Be nice and say, "Sir"
To this fat bald guy named Sloan
Stay calm, stay calm
Be Pope, play the part
Or You'll Never Get A Loan..
You'll Never Get A Loan

Keep a smile on your face
Look him in the eye
And don't act disturbed
While you wait
Just sit down, never pace
Always check your fly
Your compusure
Determines your fate

(Then) Sign off your TV,
All your furniture
Sign off everything you own
(But) be cool, stay cool,
Like a Simpson, named Bart
Or You'll Never Get A Loan
You'll....Never...Get... A... Loan...

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Tommy Turtle - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
A"lways check your fly".... good advice, but these so-called "credit counseling agencies" don't tell ya that....they leave out the improtant stuff..... I guess they're thinking "full disclosure" is required. Credit score 555, but you get the loan anyway, @ 18% + costs and fees.
btw, this "u&me on the same wavelength" thing is gettin' a little scary :) :) :)
Stephen Harrington - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but 5s for a good play.
John Barry - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Your loan has APR (a parody rating) of 5.5.5
alvin rhodes - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
an inspirational anthem
PMS - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
555 Now you'll have to write one called "My Loan Bill" to the tune of "My Boy Bill"...
Agrimorfee - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Stephen, DKTOS? Listen to the fadeout of Pink Floyd's "Fearless", o watch the last 10 minutes of the Jerry Lewis telethon next Labor Day. ;)
Dee Range - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Let me loan ya some 5's...not that ya need 'em. Great stuff
Royce Miller - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
AFW-in addition to your advice about getting a loan, I would add try a credit union instead of a bank. Good parody.
Rex - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Who was that masked man? It was... the Loan Arranger! Great idea, you have plenty of parody collateral here.
AFW - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Tommy....actually, I have a confession to make..My dog Sniffy has been stalking you nightly and keying me in on themes of your submits...He thought it would be a cool practical joke....................and thanks, John, Stephen, and alvin.........................and thanks, PMS...hmm, sounds like a good idea, there............................and thanks, Agrimorfee..true, JL every Labor Day..........................and thanks, Dee, and thanks, Royce....yes I think you're right about credit unions..............................and thanks, Rex...
TT - April 21, 2006 - Report this comment
So, that's where those poo piles in my yard have been coming from?
Red Ant - April 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Your credit score here is 555.
AFW - April 21, 2006 - Report this comment
TT....not from Sniffy..He's house trained..only goes in the house....................and thanks, Red Ant
Originality Cop - April 23, 2006 - Report this comment
Larry Hensley - April 24, 2006 - Report this comment
I'm not alone in commenting and 5'ing this

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