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Song Parodies -> "RIP America and Long Live Texas"

Original Song Title:

"The Star Spangled Banner"

Original Performer:

Francis Scott Key

Parody Song Title:

"RIP America and Long Live Texas"

Parody Written by:

Michael McVey

The Lyrics

This is looking only a little into the future. I hope the 4th verse will one day be the national anthem of an independent Texas.
Oh, fallen are they, who extinguished God’s light and gleefully marched down the road to perdition.
Though so many have died for the great Bill of Rights, their posterity pines for its prompt demolition.
Their fathers were free, now they are naughty, so blinded by pride, arrogant and haughty,
and now the white flag of surrender will wave o’er the land of blasphemy, the home of the depraved.

Oh, why did they think they knew better than God, or the principled men who gave birth to their nation?
They rejected wisdom and pursued moral rot; they aborted their young, what an abomination!
With money obsessed, with evil possessed, they provoked the outcry of the men they oppressed. Though warned of their fate, no repentance they gave from the land of blasphemy, the home of the depraved.

Then God’s patience ran out for the obstinate mules, who mocked His great Word and their own Constitution.
So using the sword of a vile, godless land, He condemned their hard hearts to deserved destitution.
Too late they cry out, their time has run out, let them be a lesson to nations about.
Let all those repent, who don’t want to share the grave of the land of blasphemy, the home of the depraved.

(INTERLUDE, THEN ANNOUNCE THE TEXAS NATIONAL ANTHEM)

So our one future hope is for Texas to rise and rebuke the mistakes of the last generation,
and by keeping the good and avoiding the bad, from the sad Yankee ruins, establish a great nation.
So long live Texas, may no evil vex us, as we raise the Lone Star while entreating humbly,
God grant that the Lone Star shall shine eternally, o’er a land where He is king and His people are free!
©2017 by Michael W. McVey Original in public domain

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.6
How Funny: 2.4
Overall Rating: 2.6

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   7
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 7
 
 2   1
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 1
 
 3   1
 2
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 4   1
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 1
 
 5   4
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User Comments

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Jay_sherman - August 25, 2017 - Report this comment
I certainly can't wait for a time when at least one of those states on the electoral map actually turns purple instead of red or blue. Good job. Probably could extend to other states who want to sucede from the country.
Holy Harry - August 25, 2017 - Report this comment
Absurd, disgraceful, treasonous claptrap written by a cultural dinosaur. You are obliged to respect and uphold and improve and defend the UNITED States. Already, Hurricane Harvey has loosed its punishment on you by smiting Texas. Shall I tear down your statues of Davy Crockett? What do you do for a living – stand on a street corner bellowing Bible quotations? Better stay off my corner.
Michael McVey - August 25, 2017 - Report this comment
The 10 Commandments: 1-10) Don't Mess With Texas.
Holy Harry - August 25, 2017 - Report this comment
The 11th Commandment: Don't trivialize the Ten Commandments.
Beauregard Claghorn - August 26, 2017 - Report this comment
The parody is all hat, no cattle.
Patrick - August 26, 2017 - Report this comment
Matches the spirit and vocabulary of the mostly unsung verses of the Star Spangled Banner. You have obviously labored a long time on this one. Even retrieved the original meaning of the word "naughty", which was a stronger term for "evil" or "lacking in moral character" than the word means today. Would like to hear this sung, perhaps to the melody of "To Anacreon in Heaven".
Holy Harry - August 26, 2017 - Report this comment
Art thou accusing humble, law-abiding me of blasphemy and depravity in the guise of 19th Century poetic grandiloquence? Get specific. The guilty are the malefactors of great wealth, the public bullies and braggarts and liars and con artists and religious scammers, the pardoners of convicted criminals, the corporate raiders, Big Pharma extortionists, nepotists, racists, war mongers, pussy grabbers, and all the rest, many of whom live in the Not-So-Great State of Texas.
The Anagrammatist - August 26, 2017 - Report this comment
"Long live Texas!", or perhaps ... "Vile song; latex."
Kutabare! - August 27, 2017 - Report this comment
^ You wanna curse, bakayarou? Kuso kurae!
CML - August 27, 2017 - Report this comment
Just remember that consistent progressive standard, Mike: If California wants to declare sanctuary cities in violation of the law or try to conduct its own foreign policy or stamp its foot and say it wants to secede .... who are YOU to judge. If Texas wants to go its own way .... it's HIGH TREASON, you knuckle-dragging, bible thumping BIGOT!!! ...... It's all in the CAPS, man
Rooting For TEXIT - August 27, 2017 - Report this comment
"BIGOT" is right. Texas has 18 KKK organizations, more than any other state. It is No. 11 on the list of percentage of very religious citizens (bible thumpers). There are millions of suspicious grooves in Texas soil, indicating a population of knuckle draggers.
Holy Larry - August 28, 2017 - Report this comment
God is smiting Texas for it's many sins. The deluge cometh! Repent and be baptized!
Holy Harry - August 28, 2017 - Report this comment
Hey, Holy Larry, I told you to work your own side of the street. You're a candidate for a divine whacking. Anyway, I have already baptized Texas under 50 feet of water.
Patrick - August 29, 2017 - Report this comment
18 KKK organizations? Do any of them consist of more than one guy with a post office box and a Facebook page?
Indeed - August 29, 2017 - Report this comment
http://kut.org/post/there-are-84-active-hate-groups-texas-most-any-state

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