The old wife she went to the Gap with her daughter
to buy a new jacket and so return back;
The shopper so loved it that eight minutes after
Her baggie was filled as well as her sack.
The outlet store pleased her she didn't come home
she shopped like at Christmas and spent all the dough;
She shopped and she scampered, she hollered, she whooped.
And all the day long, this, this was her song;
Was ever a young girl so very confused?
"Oh Kelly," cried Shelly, "these clothes aren't worth stealing,
both backside and belly are rumpled all o'er.
You whine like a retard, why? What the f--k's with you?
We'll go like a shopper and find other stores"
They went; and the shoppers had clothing to buy
she came out with sandals a foot and half high,
She waddled, she trembled, but hollered and whooped,
And all the day long this, this was her song were ever two shoppers so very confused?
Then Becky, she met them, a third of their number
would sneak from her home and she did so, no doubt
The shopper's behavior though would not encumber
but in the old manner her parents find out.
Thus Shelly and Kelly and Becky the wild
where all about shopping-time browse for a while
They skipped in the mall, they hollered and whooped,
and all the day long this, this was their song, were ever three shoppers so very confused?
And when they were home they did stare at each other
and smiling: "Hey hey girls, what shall we now do?
For all of our loot's spent, we have but one dollar
and new shopping malls will all come to town soon.
O why did we buy in such haste at the mall,
to Marshalls, who always had half off on all,
We bumped into shoppers then hallowed and whooped."
then all the day long this, this was their song:
were ever three shoppers so very confused?