Well I'm gonna buy the sun, and I'm gonna buy the mirror
and I'll buy the Guardian, I f I get the time at Dinner

Well I bought all the lot
theres nothing In
and the supplements
were all looking thin

Sometimes I wonder what the readers do
There ain't no point in the Summertime news

Well Rupert Murdoch once told me that the Daily mail is funny
but you'd better not read the observer next sunday

So i read it with a smirk
and the columns made me sick
they say "you shouldn't read the news
in a font size way too big"

Some times I wonder
If Ol' Nessie is true
see theres no read
in the summertime news

I got the Express, from the stall at my Train Station
read about coffee cups, in seven different nations

So I wrote to the editor and he gave me a note
it said "the recent hot weather, mate,
has made the paper bloat"

Sometimes I wonder did they mean it too
There ain't no cure fr the summertime news