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Song Parodies -> "I Am A Sweaty Teenager With Pimples, Zits, and Nose-Oil"

Original Song Title:

"I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General"

Original Performer:

DJ Blaze

Parody Song Title:

"I Am A Sweaty Teenager With Pimples, Zits, and Nose-Oil"

Parody Written by:

DJ Blaze

The Lyrics

This is my first take on one of the Big 7. And this is a problem I live with, so this is a true story. I won't say any more, I'll just let the farcing do the talking! Enjoy!
(Sung by DJ Blaze)
I am a sweaty teenager with pimples, zits, and nose-oil
I wash it with some Clean And Clear but yet it still remains awful
I wipe the sweat right off my face each time I work out during school
I use astringent after that, but still my skin is acne-ful

I think it's so annoying that my face is filled with bumps pus-ful
To wipe out all the acne on my face would be a miracle
About each time I pop them they will just spew out some sick'ning juice

(Music stops, spoken)
No! I won't pop it, for the last time!

(Music begins again)
With many evil bumps, my face, can't we just call an ending truce?

(Sung by pimples)
We'll never leave your face without a fight, so put that gel to use!
We'll never leave your face without a fight, so put that gel to use!
We'll never leave your face without a fight, so put that gel to useful use!

(Sung by DJ Blaze)
I play a lot of DDR, no wonder you are popping up
I sweat a lot from Max 300*, pimples drink it till they pop
In short, I'm grieved by all this acne making me non-beautiful
I am a sweaty teenager with pimples, zits, and nose-oil

(Sung by pimples)
In short, he's grieved by all this acne making him non-beautiful
He is a sweaty teenager with pimples, zits, and nose-oil

(Sung by DJ Blaze)
I know it comes from neglecting my hygiene when I'm waking up
I going straight to breakfast without washing up, they're making pus
So here's an anthem for the acne, cause they're horrible spammers
If my face ever clears up, then I'll praise the Lord miraculous!

I can tell a hunker from a small one just by looking at their heads
I know they're never merciful, that's just the part that I most dread
And I can tell they want a fight, because they shield my Persa-Gel

(Music stops, spoken)
No, very bad! This sucks!

(Music starts again)

I'm bursting all the bumps, because I really cannot take much more!

(Sung by pimples)
He's bursting all us bumps, watch out! He's squeezing each one, very poor!
He's bursting all us bumps, watch out! He's squeezing each one, very poor!
He's bursting all us bumps, watch out! He's squeezing each one, very very poor!

(Sung by DJ Blaze)
Then I can go to public school without a laughing student horde
And study ev'ry subject without acne growing more and more
But that is just a dream I'm dreaming, even though it's beautiful
I'm still a sweaty teenager with pimples, zits, and nose-oil

(Sung by pimples)
But that is just a dream he's dreaming, we don't think it's beautiful
He's still a sweaty teenager with pimples, zits, and nose-oil

(Sung by DJ Blaze)
The day will come when scientists will find a cure for pimple-in'
Then I will smile wide, hurrah, no acne, only dimple-in'
This facial problem's making me quite angry, like a maniac
I think by now it's time to plan a facial wash and rinse attack

I feel so bad when rivals at my school shall start their shunnery
I'm angry as Sir Hamlet, I'll shout "GET THEE TO A NUNNERY!!!**"
But that's another scheme I made up to devise a strategy
To get the stupid zits and nose-oil to run away from me

(Sung by pimples)
We're aren't stupid, and we'll never try to run away, you creep!
We're aren't stupid, and we'll never try to run away, you creep!
We're aren't stupid, and we'll never try to run away, you nagging creep!

(Sung by DJ Blaze)
Though I'm great at brushing all my teeth, I am an ace at dentistry
I'm still a hopeless n00b when it comes to my problem of acne
To end, I'm really ticked by acne making me non-beautiful
I am a sweaty teenager with pimples, zits, and nose-oil

(Sung by pimples)
To end, he's really ticked by acne making him non-beautiful
He'll always be a sweaty teen with pimples, zits, and nose-oil!

(Spoken by me at the end while scrubbing face vigorously)
WHY WON'T YOU DIE!!!???????
* Max 300 is one of the original hardest songs from the dancepad arcade game Dance Dance Revolution. ** A quote from William Shakespeare's famous play Hamlet. I'll probably tackle Bohemian Rhapsody next, seeing as it is the one I know the best. I did Modern Major General first just because it's a fun song. Just like blackjack21 would've said in his parody if the rhyming didn't deny it: "And DJ Blaze away, doing things his own way"!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 0
 1
 
 5   5
 7
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

DJ Blaze - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Oh, man, what the heck did I just do?! I said the writer of the OS was me instead of G&S. Oh well, re-upload tomorrow.
Andria - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Just to let you know, DJ, I ain't gone yet, so I'll continue to leave you comments and votes until I am. This parody was very well written and details one of the most common complaints teenagers have- right up there with curfews and too much homework. 5s to you, and let's hope your acne isn't as bad in real life as in your parody. I had more dry skin than acne when I was your age.
Christie Marie M - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Good show on the Big 7, DJ Blaze! I'm thinking of doing one someday. I hope Tommy Turtle would take a look at this! I'd like to see you satire "Bohemian Rhapsody" and possibly "Supercalifragilistic..." someday! Getting acne is the worst problem for teens. Not only did I get pimples on my face, but on my shoulders, neck, and back as well. That's because I have a weakness for chocolates, dairy, and greasy fast food! Also, I easily get blackheads. When I got my facial done weeks ago, this lady who did my facial was very critical! She told me to cut down on greasy, fried foods such as french fries, and to drink lots of water! Very creative work on your part, especially when you had those "pimples" singing! Take 555 Clearasils and Astringents!
DJ Blaze - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks to Andria and Christie! And Christie, TT has checked out some of my recent works, so he might take a look at this one. And BTW, when I get this re-uploaded with the correct OS artist, I'll send it in for the SOTM.
Fiddlegirl - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Hey, DJ: Terrific job on your 1st MG... A few bumps in pacing (so to speak- hehe), so I scored it a "4". But a number of good lines, namely the Hunker vs. small one, the couplet of pimple-in/dimple-in, and the "shunnery". I doubt there are ANY former teens here who don't remember those days... and, take heart, they *do* pass! :D
Gari J - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
I swear this is a real problem for any teenager, I had when I was younger it was like a plague and itch that never went away I like this DKTOS but the point is clear
Mark Scotti - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Great first shot at this, DJ!!! Funny song.
Guy - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
DJ - Way to pimp a parody. Sounds like you need a lunar sander to get at those craters. This parody is really comical - You're such a pimpleton. =;-) That zit - take 5.
DJ Blaze - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
Fiddlegirl: Thanks, and I agree the pacing is totally whack in some places, include one place you didn't mention "horrible spammers" should have one more syllable. Gari J: Thanks, and I know exactly how you feel. And there was a time when I didn't know this song. Mark Scotti: Thanks, and I agree this was just a first shot, nothing too grand. Guy: Thanks, and I definitely need a lunar sander for my acne! Man, this parody got popular all of a sudden!
alvin - August 24, 2009 - Report this comment
very descriptive stuff here...lol
DJ Blaze - August 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Alvin!

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