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Song Parodies -> "Help Me! I'm Stuck Inside!"

Original Song Title:

"Baby, It's Cold Outside"

Original Performer:

Dean Martin and Doris Day

Parody Song Title:

"Help Me! I'm Stuck Inside!"

Parody Written by:

Abbott Skelding

The Lyrics

Day 7 of the "25 Days of Christmas Parody" challenge. Milk and cookies are out, snow is falling on a lovely Christmas Eve. A lovely seven year old girl is getting ready for Santa to deliver the toys...but he got stuck in the chimney. *Regular text is the little girl, text in parentheses is Santa Claus.* Original Song
Almost Christmas Day (It’s time to go on my ride)
A mere hours away (A magical sleigh ride flight)
This year I have been (On Dasher, Donner, Blitzen!)
So very nice (Go Rudolph go! Use your nose light!)
I’ve put out the milk and cookies (Flyin’ through the snow flurries)
And mom says I can’t stay up no more (Will not go through the front door)
So Santa, please won’t you hurry? (I’ll just slide down the chimney)
I’ve never been this anxious before! (Then fly right back to the North Pole)

I hope that he brings (there’s the first house right there)
A new bike that’s pink (I’ll park and go right down there)
I wish I knew how (walk up to the chimney now)
You fly so well (and just like that, it all goes well)
I’ll hear you say “ho,ho,ho” sir (Think that they made these smaller)
As you fly on the cold Christmas night (It’s too small, my butt is too wide)
I really can’t wait! (I’m stuck and can’t get out!)
(Help me! I’m stuck inside!)

*two hours later*

It’s starting to snow (Help me! I’m stuck inside!)
I simply must know! (Help me! I’m stuck inside!)
What toys did he bring? (This chimney that I’m stuck in)
I’ll sneak downstairs (Please have the reindeer call for help)
And maybe I’ll get to witness (I don’t want to wreck Christmas)
Ol’ Santa leaving toys on the floor (My body’s getting awfully sore)
I’m hoping he didn’t miss us (Those cookies smell delicious)
Maybe we’re later on his tour (Help me out, I can’t take much more)

Oh where did he go? (Can anyone help down there?)
No presents or coal (The elves must be awfully scared)
The cookies still stand (I’ve lost feeling in my hands)
Untouched, you see (Why do I use these damn chimneys?!)
Well now I’m just filled with sorrow (Why is this so damn narrow?!)
Santa’s not real, my sister was right (Tell the kids that I really tried…)
I knew he was fake! (Won’t someone hear my shout?!)

(Help me! I’m cold…
Help me! I’m stuck inside!!)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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2Eagle - December 07, 2018 - Report this comment
Good G rated job on this OS, but didn't you know Santa can get down the chimney by going "zap" like on Star Trek.
Jonathan - December 07, 2018 - Report this comment
I'm sure the snowflakes will be offended by this parody, too! 5s
Matthias - December 07, 2018 - Report this comment
I for one am deeply offended by this. Are you FAT SHAMING Santa Claus in saying that he could get stuck inside of a chimney?! This song is banned from the airwaves!
CowPattyHearst - December 08, 2018 - Report this comment
"Silent Night" should be banned, too. It has the word "virgin". Remember when The Moon is Blue was banned in Boston?
Darius Whitehead - December 09, 2018 - Report this comment
The Moon is Blue had been banned for reasons. It wasn't even funny nor romantic. (that was just my opinion on how bad that film was, not the song itself, just the film)

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