"The Bris"

Bring your baby, let’s do this bris.
Don't all day be, I got a waiting list..
I’ll just take his little gland and snip it like this.
Eee-yah! Missed, baby, missed.
Give that tourniquet a twist.
I’ve never done this – and I feel remiss.

You all know, people, I’m a mohel of renown
That iI cut too deep, I’ll say it boils down.
Here’s the gist: a twist of wrist took
no ounce of flesh, but pound.
Eeee-yah, pissed, sure you’re pissed,
and I have earned, being hissed.
My goof I don’t dismiss, and I’m gonna fix this.

Can’t you see? He’ll be a “miss.”
Yeah, he’ll be his bro’s little sis
since he hasn’t got a c*ck
'cause I muffed his bris.
Eee-yah, don’t persist bein' mad at this.
Can’t we make up and kiss?
We’ll chuckle over this when we reminisce
Yeah, c*cks’ gone now.
Call your spawn now
“Miss.”