I'm a famous lad every day
My manager walks right in
There's a mail letter in his hand
Made to my name, I opened it

Its says, "Sir, can you spoof a parody ?
Well..Bob... I don't know
But other celebrities walk over fans with their feet
Wearing their Hollywood clothes

La la la, de de da
La la, de de da da da

(Chorus)
Bring in the package of fan mail
How much do have tonight
Well, celebrities don't give a darn
And famous people aren't right

Now we get letter from mimes
I was invited to go and ski
And I've been asked to tell a joke or two
Hollywood is for celebrities
It says, "Sir, I'm a bit tacky."
As the smile emerged on my face
"Well I'm sure that I could be a movie star
If I could get out of this place"

Oh, la la la, de de da
La la, de de da da da

Now my fan Paul is a oddjob
Who doesn't even have a wife
And he's talkin' about joing the good ol navy
And probably will be for life

Schwartzinegger goes out for politics
And one day he'll be hated or stoned
Yes, famous people are getting letters to them
Either threats or greets from home

(Chorus)

It's a pretty good crowd for today
And the movie begins in a while
My fans are wonderful and then they run up to me
And I meet my fan named Kyle
And he's broke and really stinky
And the fan mail keeps on coming here
And I hope I can get out of this mess soon
And say, "Man, what am I doin' here?"

Oh, la la la, de de da
La la, de de da da da

(Chorus)