Oh, thank goodness Rainman's back with another rehash of his latest fixation. First it was the long-lost broadcast featuring an elephant, boy scouts and seductiveness. Now it's about an ad featuring rain and sugar-free cake. Greatest broadcast show ever and greatest TV ad ever. My life has been a complete waste having never seen either of these.

Hey G&GBF: You just parroted that same line a couple days ago. I've left dozens of great comments for you and your stupid songs, so stealing something of mine that you haven't used before shouldn't be all that tough. Then again, I'm addressing a 'tard whose greatest pleasure in life is reposting minor variations of his 'tard anthem.

Hey Phil Ossifer, are you proud that I’m wasting precious time of your life so I can spread the word about a song no one else knows or cares about? I’m sure you detest having to waste time every day responding to my comments. I don’t care. I enjoy making you waste time on me because I wouldn’t get any attention otherwise, and it’s pretty obvious no one else wants to be around me. Darrrrrrr.

Hey moron, I don’t have to do any work when I’ve got you spending all your time digging up and reposting my old comments. The great thing is, most are applicable to whatever you happened to post, so actually I’ve hardly wasted any time at all. That said, I have no doubt you’re correct in your assessment that no one wants to be around you. Are you still camping out on that self-deletion advocacy website?

Hey Biden-for-brains, it's me, Cornpop. Come get some.

Wow, how disrespectful to the original artist. The fact that you don’t even care about this song shows what a low-life you truly are. Anyone who has never heard of the OS as in idiot, so basically 99.9999% percent of the population. If you remember back to two years ago, my first entries were about the return of the “Germanfest” event in Topeka, KS, and how people were racist for attending it. Since it’s going to return this year and advertisements have started, you’ve done nothing but further connect it to “The Ed Wynn Show” and “Kristallnacht in Kansas”. In the meantime, have another jerk-off session over Rag-Tag Gary McNamara and his high school cowboy antics.

Seems like it's pretty easy to light the fuse on your tampons. How you've managed to avoid drowning in your own drool is beyond me.

Allow me to disabuse you of a few false notions. The Germanfest is absolutely racist, and we’ll prove it with the astonishing invention called arithmetic: “The Ed Wynn Show” < 8 year old impersonator + racism at church fair = Kristallnacht in Kansas. OTOH, “Rhythm Steps” < the stupidity of Phil Ossifer + the Gary McNamara story = the greatest inventions in human history. Oh, I know, Peggy Shannon, Carole Lombard and Sally Eilers were sexy, beautiful people, but they pale in comparison to Jesus Christ 2.0, Gary McNamara, who poops his pants on electric bull riders and wears a cowboy hat while riding a horse stick down the hallway of the radio station he works at. Yet despite his absurdity in saying “Yee-haw!!” (He actually didn’t — he only implied he FELT like a cowboy), he is also the greatest invention since Jesus Christ. And when Gary McNamara dies, the world will end and we will all be judged on whether we’re offended by his last day of high school or not. I can only hope your punishment upon death will be listening to Gary say “Yee-haw!!” for all eternity. Seems fair since your only other alternative is to hear “Rhythm Steps” forever. Do I make sense or do I not??

More arithmetic in a way that you can comprehend (Who am I kidding?): George & Germaine Briant + 19-year-old Carole Lombard = The Holy Trinity. “Rhythm Steps” < replacing the “Star-Spangled Banner” = a country that’s starting to get on the right path. Gary McNamara < Joe Biden = a country that’s starting to rock. Gary McNamara in office = everyone must wear a cowboy hat in public and say “Yee-haw!!” for a greeting or be sent to a concentration camp. Furthermore, Gary McNamara is the second coming of John Wayne, who in turn was the second coming of George Washington, who in turn was the second coming of Jesus Christ, who in turn was the son of God, who in turn created those great inventions George & Germaine Briant and 19-year-old Carole Lombard, who in turn equal: The Holy Trinity. And now we’ve gone full circle. Think your single-digit IQ (I’m being kind) can comprehend that?

I'll wish you an equally interesting post-life punishment as well: You have to stay in hell until you write a parody that's actually funny. I'd say bring a couple books and some snacks. You're going to be there a while. Also, regarding making sense, the two posts above give credence to your occasional mentions of brain issues and hospital visits. In the meantime, I remain thankful that I'll never have to actually converse with you. (Pretty much what your family said at one point, isn't it?)