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Song Parodies -> "A Lost Kinescope Of A Game Show That's Lost To History"

Original Song Title:

"My Little Grass Shack In Kealakekua, Hawaii"

Original Performer:

Ben Pollack

Parody Song Title:

"A Lost Kinescope Of A Game Show That's Lost To History"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

This parody is based on the most interesting episode of a television show of all time--and no one even knows that it exists! I have wanted to get the word out about this episode for some time now. In addition to being written for fun, I have also written it in the hopes that someone out there may have a kinescope copy of this episode. I hope that person sees this parody.
I wish I could find it, a lost kinescope of a game show that's lost to history,
The one of "Beat the Clock" with "Roxanne", and 300 Boy Scouts long ago,

I can hear all those Boy Scouts cheering,
"Let us take your picture, Roxanne!"
I can picture three Boy Scouts feeling,
On the stage, an elephant, while wearing boxing gloves on their hands,

It's been so long since that night, no one even has a copy
Of this one show no one will again see,

I'm just a parody writer and I don't know where to look,
If you have this kinescope, here's my hook,

I wish I could find it, a lost kinescope of a game show that's lost to history,
With "Roxanne", 300 Boy Scouts, an elephant, and that cheering crowd,
With "Roxanne", 300 Boy Scouts, an elephant, and that cheering crowd!

(instrumental break)

I'm just a parody writer and I don't know where to look,
If you have this kinescope, here's my hook,

I wish I could find it, a lost kinescope of a game show that's lost to history,
With "Roxanne", 300 Boy Scouts, an elephant, and that cheering crowd!

I didn't make this "lost episode" up--this was based on an actual episode of "Beat the Clock" that aired in 1951! This newspaper article references the episode here. The original recording of this song by Ben Pollack is here.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   13

User Comments

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UserA38HF4 - June 13, 2022 - Report this comment
There it is...No television show today would dare pull off a stunt like that. It would be a scandal for weeks. I wouldn't get my hopes up too high about finding a copy of this episode...every episode from before August 1952 (with just two exceptions) is lost forever. One wonders if these episodes were destroyed not just because of the practices at the time, but fear of offending future generations because of Roxanne's dress (short, white, polka-dotted). I don't know why "Beat the Clock" decided to invite 300 Boy Scouts onto the same stage as a very scantily-clad woman. 71 years later, that's still a question with no answer.
Ben Pollack - June 24, 2022 - Report this comment
300 Boy Scouts can’t be wrong...
A Kansan - July 01, 2022 - Report this comment
I just wanted to it too late to file a lawsuit against Sylvania Electric Company (the sponsor of “Beat the Clock”) and CBS for allowing 300 Boy Scouts on the same stage as a scantily clad woman (“Roxanne”)? I’m asking this because if this episode were done today, there would be a LOT of people complaining about it. If they can’t even answer the question of WHY they would allow a stunt like this on national television, then they don’t deserve to have people using their services. This was the worst idea in television history and they need to be held accountable for it.
George&GermaineBriantFan - July 19, 2022 - Report this comment
1930sfan - August 12, 2022 - Report this comment
I like it! Interesting to see such a stunt attempted at this early date in television history. Do we have a specific date known for this broadcast? Are any of the Boy Scouts that appeared on this show still living? If so, how can we find them? I’m going to see if I can find more about this broadcast this weekend.
George&GermaineBriantFan - August 13, 2022 - Report this comment
Welcome to the “I know about the greatest moment in television history!” club. To answer your first question: I do not know of the exact date of this broadcast. It was definitely not after July 1, 1951 as this broadcast is mentioned in a newspaper article from that date. (linked at the bottom of this parody) 1950 seems too early. My best guess would be around February/March 1951. It’s unknown how many Boy Scouts that appeared on this show are still living, if there are any at all. You could probably run a nationwide advertising campaign looking for any known survivors, that would probably be your best shot. Of course, this was 71 years ago. And very little information about this show is available online other than my song parodies about it. If this broadcast was more well known about the ball would have been rolling by now. I wish you luck in your search for information about this broadcast!
UserA38HF4 - August 15, 2022 - Report this comment
Actually, the time frame for this broadcast can be narrowed down even further. “Beat the Clock” was, at the start of 1951, airing at the time of 10:30 P.M. on Friday nights! What Boy Scout troop could possibly be awake at that point? The schedule was changed in March 1951 to Saturday evenings at 7:30 P.M., so any date before that point can be excluded. And actually, there was an article that was dated June 4, 1951 that mentioned the broadcast as already having happened. So that narrows down the possible dates for this broadcast from March to May 1951. Sadly, it is impossible to determine the exact date this way. As for whether any survivors from this show can be located: surely the Boy Scout troop that appeared on that show made a note of all 300 or so scouts that appeared on the stage. If the particular troop that appeared can be located, then it is possible they have records pertaining to this broadcast in a storage facility. Once finding such a record listing those that appeared, one would then be able to look through the names and determine how many were still alive by looking through obituaries and online web services such as MyLife. It will take a bit of effort, but I believe it can be done. Finally, the person who suggested that the companies behind this broadcast should be sued needs to stop.
1930sfan - August 16, 2022 - Report this comment
Interesting. Had no idea that it was possible to even fit 300 young boys on a television stage. I’m sure there are probably a few survivors out there.
Harold Eldritch - August 31, 2022 - Report this comment
Is it possible to determine the exact date of this broadcast??
UserA38HF4 - September 03, 2022 - Report this comment
Sadly, no. It was definitely not before March 1951 as the show was on too late to accommodate a Boy Scout troop (10:30 P.M. on Friday nights). The closest time frame that I know of is March-May 1951. (see my comment from August 15th.)
The WORST idea in television history!! - September 03, 2022 - Report this comment
Don’t attempt to look into this broadcast — the person who wrote this parody just wants more people to know about it. This broadcast should not be referenced anywhere online, it needs to be forgotten. The comment made on July 1st, 2022 was the best comment ever made on this site.
George&GermaineBriantFan - September 22, 2022 - Report this comment
Only three months that I’ve been writing about this broadcast on this site — and look how far we have come. Thank you to everybody who has taken the time to look into this broadcast. With almost 200 views, it is now known by more people than ever before, at least since it originally aired in 1951. Your learning of this broadcast is an inspiration as we head into the fall. As long as you keep spreading the word about this broadcast, people who have yet to acknowledge the human significance of this broadcast will be amazed when they finally learn of how great it was. It truly was the greatest moment in human history, and you all get to know about it here. What a wonderful thing that is.
AmIRight users - October 25, 2022 - Report this comment
Put a sock in it, George Briant fan!

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