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Song Parodies -> "Open Container"
Original Song Title:
"Fifth Symphony"
Original Performer:
Beethoven
Parody Song Title:
"Open Container"
Parody Written by:
Al Silver
The Lyrics
If you wish to follow along with the music, the First Movement is at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4IRMYuE1hI
Leave me alone! Leave me alone!
The beer is in a paper bag; no one can see
Why do you officers insist on hassling me?
Go catch a crook, make an arrest
I'll take a breathalyzer test
WHY DO YOU LAUGH AT ME?
Leave me alone!
Here's my I.D. -- my record's clean, go check it out
I can't get drunk from just one Coors; you two are louts
Good God! A summons!
"Open container"
I've not committed an offense
This doesn't make a bit of sense
Just who's offended?
No one's offended.
You can see that I am not a wee bit tight
I pose not a danger 'cause my skin is white
Take the summons back and I'll be out of sight.
RIGHT?
This is a real shakedown
I will get myself a lawyer
This is nothing but extortion
Oh, my goodness -- not the handcuffs
Arrgh, the choke hold's getting tighter
Ouch, your baton's up my rectum
What's the fine for urination?
When I drink beer I must pee
So may I go behind that tree?
(etc.)
The beer is in a paper bag; no one can see
Why do you officers insist on hassling me?
Go catch a crook, make an arrest
I'll take a breathalyzer test
WHY DO YOU LAUGH AT ME?
Leave me alone!
Here's my I.D. -- my record's clean, go check it out
I can't get drunk from just one Coors; you two are louts
Good God! A summons!
"Open container"
I've not committed an offense
This doesn't make a bit of sense
Just who's offended?
No one's offended.
You can see that I am not a wee bit tight
I pose not a danger 'cause my skin is white
Take the summons back and I'll be out of sight.
RIGHT?
This is a real shakedown
I will get myself a lawyer
This is nothing but extortion
Oh, my goodness -- not the handcuffs
Arrgh, the choke hold's getting tighter
Ouch, your baton's up my rectum
What's the fine for urination?
When I drink beer I must pee
So may I go behind that tree?
(etc.)
Your Vote & Comment Counts
The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 11 | 12 | 12 | ||||||||
| 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 2 | 2 | 2 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Roll over, Beethoven! Reminds me of a jazz version "A Fifth of Beethoven" I heard at a Boston Pops outdoor concert decades ago; heard it again yesterday at a performance of "Gala of the Royal Horses" in Norfolk VA. My advice, when stopped by police: remain silent, "take the Fifth" (Amendment); don't mention the Coors can. 5s!
There are a lot of stories of police brutality on the internet these days. This is the first one I've seen set to music. Well done.
Thanks, Barry and Patrick. Good advice, Barry. I promise to stop being a menace to society.
I won't debate whether this is parody - original had no lyrics obviously. But it is great comic writing. Glad to see you back, old friend.
Hey, paisan Giorgio -- what a coincidence! I was checking out your latest parodies on your first-class web site http://ukableparodies.blogspot.com/ just yesterday. At the top of the list was a spot-on Hamlet's Soliloquy/Edmund Fitzgerald. My favorite line: "And thus conscience makes all of us chicken" (rhymes with "sicken").
All of Beethoven's symphonies had lyrics. "Words and Music by Schiller and Beethoven" was a big imprimatur on Blechpfanne Alley. Unfortunately, with the exception of the last movement of the Ninth, all the manuscripts with lyrics were destroyed in a flood when Mr. Margolis's bathtub in the apartment above Beethoven's overflowed. Also lost were Symphonies 10-13 and Concerto in F for Ukulele.
Nah, I'm not back. When songs were no longer being written, starting in 1956, my repertoire came to an abrupt end. So I'm a stranger to the musical culture around here. And the majority political ideology? Toto, I think we're still in Kansas.
All of Beethoven's symphonies had lyrics. "Words and Music by Schiller and Beethoven" was a big imprimatur on Blechpfanne Alley. Unfortunately, with the exception of the last movement of the Ninth, all the manuscripts with lyrics were destroyed in a flood when Mr. Margolis's bathtub in the apartment above Beethoven's overflowed. Also lost were Symphonies 10-13 and Concerto in F for Ukulele.
Nah, I'm not back. When songs were no longer being written, starting in 1956, my repertoire came to an abrupt end. So I'm a stranger to the musical culture around here. And the majority political ideology? Toto, I think we're still in Kansas.
Damn Margolis and his overflowing bathtub. How the world would have loved to hear Beethoven's 13th!!!. And it could use more of your well-crafted pieces as well.
I am in Kansas, and the prevailing ideology is going my way for the moment.
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