Gilbert & Sullivan's, "If you want a receipt for that popular mystery"
If you want to know more of our vital ingredients,
Take the physique of Sylvester Stallone,
The bashful Clark Kent and his constant obedience,
No-nonsense wisdom of Pamela Bone.
The lovely Liz Taylor, in search of a better man,
Ralph Nader speaking out all on his own.
The quick-witted, fast-talking Leno and Letterman,
Aptly-named Bell who invented the phone.
The ever-philandering Kennedy dynasty -
Tiger Woods proudly displaying his winner's tee -
Princess Diana, adored by the camera -
King George the Sixth, well-esteemed, though a stammerer -
Andrew Lloyd-Webber - the late Kurt Cobain -
Agatha Christie and Citizen Kane!
If you want a receipt for that popular mystery,
Known to the world as a Heavy Dragoon,
Take all the remarkable people in history,
Rattle them off to a popular tune.
The pluck of Lord Nelson on board of the Victory -
Genius of Bismarck devising a plan -
The humour of Fielding (which sounds contradictory) -
Coolness of Paget about to trepan -
The science of Jullien, the eminent musico -
Wit of Macaulay, who wrote of Queen Anne -
The pathos of Paddy, as rendered by Boucicault -
Style of the Bishop of Sodor and Man -
The dash of a D'Orsay, divested of quackery -
Narrative powers of Dickens and Thackeray -
Victor Emmanuel - peak-haunting Peveril -
Thomas Aquinas, and Doctor Sacheverell -
Tupper and Tennyson - Daniel Defoe -
Anthony Trollope and Mister Guizot!
If you want a receipt for this soldier-like paragon,
Get at the wealth of the Czar (if you can) -
The family pride of a Spaniard from Aragon -
Force of Mephisto pronouncing a ban -
A smack of Lord Waterford, reckless and rollicky -
Swagger of Roderick, heading his clan -
The keen penetration of Paddington Pollaky -
Grace of an Odalisque on a divan -
The genius strategic of Caesar or Hannibal -
Skill of Sir Garnet in thrashing a cannibal -
Flavour of Hamlet - the Stranger, a touch of him -
Little of Manfred (but not very much of him) -
Beadle of Burlington - Richardson's show -
Mister Micawber and Madame Tussaud!
Submitted by: John Howes
Gilbert And Sullivan's, "The Major General's Song"
i am just a big model of some modern major elements
i am the very model of a modern mayjor general
Submitted by: white trash
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