Some time ago, I'm not quite sure just when
I got an infestation from a friend
Well I said "Big date later, could you lend me your comb please"
Then I noticed that my head had bugs and fleas

I seen the bugs crawlin' up through my hair, scurryin' along
And I wished I had not seen what I saw
They won't move to some other place
It really feels like a disgrace
And I wonder how to get them off my case
Hey...

[Chorus:]
Head is always itchin'
What a sad condition
What did I do, to find myself in, this position
My scalp is turning redder
It isn't getting better
Won't leave me alo-o-one
These damn head lice

It's getting old
It feels like getting worse each day
And it's so bad I sprayed my head with Raid
But they took it all, snickering
They've got no respect for me
I'd give anything to make them leave

I just want these bugs off my head
'Cause my hair sure does itch
So don't ask to wear my hat or it'll spread
You don't want these goddamn insects
Don't get too close or you'll be next
They'll bite and breed, planting all their eggs
Heyyyyy...

Head is always itchin'
What a sad condition
What did I do, to find myself in, this position
My scalp is turning redder
It isn't getting better
Won't leave me alo-o-one
Those damn head lice

Well truth be told
These lice are gonna eat me up
I fight the insects, but the insects aren't hurt
Well I've tried the creams, the shampoos and mess
And none of them was a success
I've tried it all and nothing seems to work
Well, go home, you worthless ticks, go somewhere else
Man, I ain't crazed, but they're drivin' me insane
I'll rinse my hair with gasoline
And strike a match and burn it clean
I'll make them dead, or they'll start killin' me
Hey, hey, heyyyyyyyyy

Come on, die a little
Go away forever
I'm 'bout to try, and kill them with a... patriot missile
My scalp is turning redder
It isn't getting better
They won't leave me alone
These damn head lice