Song Parodies -> "Don't Fancy Him"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Marry Her"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Don't Fancy Him"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Here I am trying to convince a really fit lass what her life will be like if she choses him over me. I think I put up a pretty strong argument, don't you?!

Think of him with crusty toenails
Clipping them in bed
Lazing there all fat and smelly
Think of me instead
I may not be the greatest athlete
Or win at spelling bees
Don't fancy him have me

His bald head shines in sunlight
His moustache is greasy
Got a PHD in doing nowt
He's been knighted in watching TV
He watches X Files daily
He has no made routine
Don't fancy him have me

In 50 years when you're both old and going gray
You'll realise your mistake and run away
You'll have to clean his mess
Whilst he's scratching his chest
Don't fancy him have me

Those ugly Monday mornings
Your husbands still in bed
He can't be arsed to get a job
So he lies around instead
He'll use up all your money
He'll take your cash for free
Don't fancy him have me

Sitting rooms a pig sty
The kitchens even worse
Your "darling's" out and getting p*ssed
With that twenty from your purse
You haven't got a penny
He spends it all with glee
Don't fancy him have me

When he makes a mess you clean it up
You have no choice
You have no point, no values
Or a voice
He won't listen to you
Not a thing you can do
Don't fancy him have me

When your sons grow up and steal for fun
Police at your door
Then you realise you don't need it anymore
He does the same all week
And he won't let you speak
So don't fancy him...
..have meee

Like this? Check out my other stuff by either doing an authors search or by going to parody authors and scrolling down. I also have 3 parodies featuring Josh2 and one featuring Saz. Enjoy!

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Red Ant - April 09, 2005 - Report this comment

DKTOS, so no vote. I will tell you this though: Girls that age are generally ( atleast here ) interested in 3 things: popularity from dating said guy, gifts/items/fancy cars/money from said guy, or ( expletive deleted ) from said guy ( usually the first here ). They also do not think 5 weeks into the future, let alone 50 years. There are exceptions to every rule, you just have to know where to look.

Dumb Ass Kid - April 20, 2005 - Report this comment

Thanx for the tips on love, Red Ant. I'll keep that in mind

Blethar - April 23, 2005 - Report this comment

Great parody for a great song. Should make all those (and me) who are unlucky is love feel better about themselves. 5-5-5.

Dumb Ass Kid - April 23, 2005 - Report this comment

Thank you Blethar both for the vote (badly needed) and for the sentiment

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