He's a awful boyband member
Yes, he is already from Bradford
But I'll rather his band suffocate
But who fucking loves them now
(Caught in a One Direction video)
But who fucking hated them then
(Caught in a Nicki Minaj video)

I heard the news yesterday
That Harry Styles had pissed off
But I've been caught with Zayn Malik

I heard the news tonight, tonight
That Metronomy have reformed
But without that cunt Joe Mount

But I can see where I am now
Someday I shoot myself with a Uzi
Uzi is a WWII gun
That is not to play with, ah
You can't see both standoff sides
And you have pissed me off
Oh, I've been caught in a Daft Punk song

Overheard the news yesterday
That Fiona Apple had shot herself in the ass
But I've been caught in a Nicki Minaj moment
Misheard the news just yesterday
That Mock The Week is Motley Crue
But I've been caught in a transit van