Song Parodies -> "Head of Lice"

Original Song Title:

"Cup of Life"

Original Performer:

"Head of Lice"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Go! Go! Go!
(Go! Go! Go!)
Away! Away! Away!
(Away! Away! Away!)
Gross! (Gross!)
Bugs! (Bugs!)
Itch! (Itch!)
Scratch! (Scratch!)
Hair’s their home (Yuck!)

This head of lice
Driving me nuts!
On blood they dine
Next to dandruff
I tried shampoo, What can I do?
Wish they’d drop dead, Fall from my head!

I need to be deloused! Please help me Dr. House!
Don’t want to be the snack for pesky insects!
Now all my friends chastise me for my head of lice
Because I look so weird sporting this hairnet
Sporting this hairnet (Lame!)
Due to these insects (Yuck!)

Sombrero
Needs to be sprayed with Raid
It’s so gross
These bugs are near my brain
They’re slight but fight!
And make me so irate!
My head of lice!
Dismay! Dismay! Dismay!

My head of lice is worse than flies
In my eyebrow, Down in my tights
Strap on some gloves then take a stroll
Throughout my locks comb, comb comb!

They will not die from DEET
My skull they like to eat
I wish they would just drown
When I take a shower
The chicks think it’s nasty
It’s hard to go on dates
Stuck with this head of lice
I’m in their power!
I’m such a coward (Yikes!)
While they devour (Yikes!)

Do put on
My silly French beret

Comb my fro!
We’ll scare those creeps away!
Can feel them bite and they are such a pain
My head of lice is making me complain!

They are making me itch!
All these pesky insects!
They are parasitic!
I am through with their shtick!
Damn!

My head of lice isn’t too fun
On up they climbed to my mop-top
Twisted and wrong they brought a throng
They don’t belong! Shave my hair off!

Now I am feeling scared those jerks invade my hair
They’re planning their attack and I gotta stop it!
They’re in for a surprise! There in my head of lice
Bought some clippers cheap! Going to aggravate them! (Ha!)
They don’t have a permit! (Bugs!)
I’m not going to acquit! (Bugs!)
I am going to shave it! (Off!)

Now it’s gone!
I’m bald! I’m bald! I’m bald!

Mowed! Mowed! Mowed!
My hair clean off my head!

Go take a hike!
Fixed at a discount rate!
My head of lice!
Is saved! Is saved! Is saved!

Once the place
For lice to play croquet
Broke the law
My rent they never paid!
There’s still termites!
That invaded my place!
The head of lice!
Is shaved! Is shaved! Is shaved!

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Mark Scotti - September 16, 2010 - Report this comment

I'm "itchin' to give you fives on this...

Matthias - September 16, 2010 - Report this comment

Oops Typo: "Do put on" should have been "Don't put on"

NorCalCougares - September 16, 2010 - Report this comment

Unfortunately, this is a non-humorous Reality for grammar School children: NorCAL schools are inundated with HeadLice ~ BedBugs ~ and now Ring Worms ! !

Tommy Turtle - September 16, 2010 - Report this comment

Not into Ricky Martin, DKTOS, but you *did* put in a ref. to Dr. House (knew how to get my vote, eh? Sly!), and the DEET ref was good. 555, and are you sure it's your *head* that's full of lice, heh heh! ;-D

Old Man Ribber - September 16, 2010 - Report this comment

Matthias - Nice job, no doubt prepared "from scratch"! I always give 5s to thwart the one bomber, but this is "en-lice-ening"! ;D

Agrimorfee - September 25, 2010 - Report this comment

For some reason--and as expertly paced and strongly written as this was--it really kind of nauseated me. Now I know that sounds bizarre coming from the guy who wrote "Chiggers", "Puke Song" and "Stinky Stinky Poo Poo Butt", but one nev er knows ones tastes sometimes.

Rex - September 26, 2010 - Report this comment

(Artistry) Definitely use cartoon bugs in the video. Nice image of lice playing croquet on your head, heh heh.

Christie Marie M - September 26, 2010 - Report this comment

(Artistry 81) Wow, I can relate, except I have more of a mosquito problem than lice problem. I had lice one time and let me tell you, it was no walk in the park. Everyone looked and laughed at the way I was always scratching my head! When I used to go to school, I would dread during the time to get our heads checked for lice. But now I know what to do to prevent them...don't share hairbrushes or towels or any type of things people put on their heads. I never want to get my head shave, but in that case, I'd rather get bald than to have a head full of lice. But we have this stainless steel comb from the Philippines that's effective for removing lice. It hurts, but it really works. Well, here's 555 doses of Licenex for your head!

Below Average Dave - September 27, 2010 - Report this comment

I didn't expect to like this one, but the pacing, grammar and rhyme scheme all worked, and it was hilarious Matt. . .seriously unexpected. You took one of the nastiest topics and turned it into a gem on a very difficult song considering its repetitiveness. Even more impressive is that you somehow made it 'make sense' with the original, something I always strive for, very good parody Matty.

bobpiecheese - September 30, 2010 - Report this comment

(Artistry) I am glad to say that I have never had lice, and have never known anyone with lice. Sure there were a few "ZOMG LICE LET'S CHECK EVERYONE'S HEAD" scares at school, but that's just a part of life. Very clever idea, stayed great the whole way through. I have this image for the video of the lice providing the musical backup. 5! 5! 5! Ale! Ale! Ale!

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