I woke up this morning, my junk inert
I splashed it with water trying to make it more pert
I rummaged through my drug supply with waning hope until
(I) Found the one I need - it's that little blue pill

And slam bam I'm hard as a rock
Tumefied my cock with a drug that's ad hoc
Don't need to psychoanalyze - I'm over the hill
(But) All I've gotta take is that little blue pill

Well it's my way of provin' I'm still a stud
A beacon of manhood: my big, turgid pud
When my Willie's shrunken and it's lost all its will
I know I can count on that little blue pill

And slam bam I'm stiffer'n steel
Like a hooded seal that I cannot conceal
Don't want no one to think that I'm a corporate shill
(But) Pfizer takes the prize for that little blue pill

If a caveat is due, heed this final word:
That certain side effects have been know to occur
Four hours later, my meat is swollen still
From a single dose of that sildenafil.

And slam bam I'm off to the doc
I go into shock as he lances my cock
Why he did not anesthetize, it troubles me still
(But) Now I've more respect for that little blue pill

And slam bam I'm flaccid and limp
Feeling like a shrimp, like a most chastened chimp
Don't even got a partner, so it's just a hand drill
Guess I really don't need that little blue pill
Won't ever go back to that little blue pill