Everybody hates me;
Whenever I try
To approach them they flee
As if I have
Fleas or a flesh-eating disease
Because I have a severe
Tatt-a-ling problem

Yesterday Jane cried
Because I accused her of picking on Clyde
I don’t understand why parents and teachers
Get so confused; I
Stick up for them, though my classmates think
I am kissing up

I’m a snitch, I’m a liar
Whose good pants are on fire
I get yelled at by the class,
The teacher kicks my ass,
And the principal sits
Behind her desk and shakes
Her head and wonders why the hell I’m here again

Don’t send me there again
‘Cause it means I’ll be sitting in detention
Rest assured that
When around her I get nervous
And I’m thinking in extremes
In my hands I cradle
My head and I start to pray

I’m a snitch, I’m a liar
Whose good pants are on fire
I get yelled at by the class,
The teacher kicks my ass,
And the principal sits
Behind her desk and shakes
Her head and wonders why the hell I’m here again

[Singer tries to ruin the guitar solo by fishing for the teacher’s attention.]

Just when you think I’m not telling on you
I have a teacher by my side
I’m wailing as I’m weaving my tale
My version of events

I’m a snitch, I’m a liar
Whose good pants are on fire
I get yelled at by the class,
The teacher kicks my ass,
And the principal sits
Behind her desk and shakes
Her head and wonders why the hell I’m here again

I’m a snitch, nose is brown
My smile is upside down
‘Cause I hurt, ‘cause I suffer;
“Teacher, Emma sniffed some huffer!”
I feel dumb, like a chum
But I cannot help it
So I’d sincerely advise you to watch your back