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Song Parodies -> "Virtual Profanity"

Original Song Title:

"Virtual Insanity"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Jamiroquai

Parody Song Title:

"Virtual Profanity"

Parody Written by:

Agrimorfee

The Lyrics

There's some hidden meanings and puns in here. Listen or read carefully.
You know what shitake is? Let me tell ya
It's a mushroom that you can eat at home
A frigate is a boat quite small
And a piston helps work the engines on a car, truck or bus
And a dictator, he rules all his world
And when all is told
Sounds naughty
Grit your teeth
Say them slowly
And you can't help but make a titter or sneer
'Cause the words sound like something else you'd hear
But I promise in the pending chorus and verse
There WON'T be a dirty word you'll be hearing in
This Jamiroquai song that I have now rewritten
The thing you're gonna hear is

This song, made of, virtual profanity
Now we just slip through gutter syntax, yes this we have
The ship fits, flicking, it's voodoo wordology
Oh wow, chills up my spine
This whole thing is asinine.

I wrote this song so you would not be bored
Fight against the teeming horde
Got a shih-tzu, and cockatoo, and sweet bichon-frise
All these friends, they warm the...cockles of my heart
They're so wild
In a very special way
My girlfriend has a country stay
Her posse will come save the day
You silly titwillow, brain is like a pigeon
Woo-woo! It's Cubs game day!
Kosuke Fukudome!
Yes he is Japanese, he's the guy who plays in right field

This song's made of virtual profanity
On my trip, to Haw --aii I got a lovely lei, you see their
Snatch a box lunch, get the funk out, golly gee!
Oysters shucked by the pound
The lamb-based hearts came around

They got funny sound
Come and spread it all around
Because it's virtual profanity
Forget the usual profundity
Old sheep flocking, so rad...they are clad, you see
With hose, yeah, on toes, yeah!...
(Pretty bad punning, aint' it?)

(INSTRUMENTAL BREAK WHILE READERS SCRATCH THEIR HEADS)

All this... virtual profanity, I'm spitting it
English is strange, yeah!
Craps...is just a gambling game
And yet we go on
Schlitz, we're drinking it, oh
Oh, virtual profanity! Oh!
A woodpecker's next in range
What a bust! I'll take a peep, looking on
This is virtual, virtual profanity that I'm dealing in
That you're dealing with
A virtual profanity...a crock of ships!

(Yeah...ooh...)

This song's made of virtual profanity
Sneak it,past the FCC, assume tune is bad
Scared spitless, shifting, in our blue jeans a oijou
Jack off hill, on his crown
As holy as a clown

Punning! ...Virtual Profanity!...Punning...Virtual Profanity!...(continuously)

(Got pitch a shift!...Bubble gum you blow!...Crappie fish, man!...Live in a salacious world!)

Virtual profanity is what we're punning on.
Copyright 2008, Agrimorfee. Holy shoot.

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 25

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 4
 2
 
 5   23
 21
 23
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

T***y Tur*-le - October 02, 2008 - Report this comment
Lenny Bruce (first famous stand-up comedian, 50 yrs ago) was once arrested in Las Vegas for "profanity" in his act.. He said, "sh*t". His comment to the press was, "I got arrested for saying "sh*t" in a town where the biggest game is called "crap".
DKTOS, but no head-scratching here -- I'm fully abreast with you. You've fructified my day and left me tittering, proving the pen-is mightier than the sword. Although "titwillow" might have been followed up with "pussy-willow" (or "titmouse"), I c*nt give you anthing but Fives.
Joel Martinez - October 02, 2008 - Report this comment
LOL, I think if Hank Hill ever saw this, he'd finally realize "what's asinine" (If you can say puns, why can't I?). Good sheet!
Matthias - November 13, 2008 - Report this comment
Flunking hilarious! This was so funking great that I pretty much shiite my pants laughing.
Jason - November 13, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Good, though I feel its very slightly straying into Whatfreaks territory.
Guy - November 16, 2008 - Report this comment
What a farging icehole bastich son on a bench and banister shiite ash corksoaker morter forker of a parody. Am I allowed to say five out here?
Gianni Parmesiani - November 26, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Guy beat me to the "Johnny Dangerously" movie character lingo-- you "fargin' ice-a-hole" you-- but I got a real kick out of this one. You could probably do it five more times with out repeating any "virtual profanity".
EmiLoca - November 26, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) - Okay, now I'm going straight to urbandictionary.com to look up every last weird move you described in here... still, freakin' hilar.
John Jenkins - November 27, 2008 - Report this comment
After consulting my Funk & Wagnalls, I conclude that this is a brilliantly creative parody.
bobpiecheese - November 27, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Clever, very clever. Great work here Agri, 555 for sure.
Peter Andersson - November 28, 2008 - Report this comment
555! It took me years to understand why Americans laughed at my youth fishing stories and when I revealed that the secret is to be a master bater, but that was long ago and most of this parody I got right away, I think...
Max Power - November 29, 2008 - Report this comment
555 it up with some bleeps
Below Average Dave - November 30, 2008 - Report this comment
That'd be correct Peter. I thought this was hilarious as an idea, and really good as a write. As a Jamiroquai fan though--I am obliged to point out the pacing was off in a few spots, but awesome parody of a song and artist who isn't hit often.
Glen S - November 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Hop on Pop. Yeah baby, don't stop. Well written, hagrid-morfee. My personal favorite was when you 'snatch a box lunch'.
Invisible Boy - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
I love dangerous word-play. So....I totally got it !!!
And, I thought the pacing was spot-on...so 555 from me...
Red Ant - April 03, 2009 - Report this comment
Virtually profane, but completely funny and good. 555
DJ Bl@z$ (Blaze) - June 03, 2009 - Report this comment
This parody kicks asteroid! Loved the parts about the shih-tzu and craps. 555 censors here.
Guy - October 24, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC05UV

This is just as funny on the second read. See my comment above. I forgot pass on a reference to an avid reader on my first comment, so...

If you see Kay - tell her to read this.
Mark Scotti - November 03, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC really done well, considering the content!!!
Silver Power - November 03, 2009 - Report this comment
[insert profane-sounding words, making up a nice, respectful comment]. 5s.
Leo Keough - November 14, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC(5)_U/V Great idea and execution!!!...555!!!
bobpiecheese - November 14, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC5) See above!
Stuart McArthur - November 16, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) very clever idea, Ag, and clever use of the OS - got most of the gags, although some of the product names I don't get - of the club that worships your parodic powers, there are country and city members - I am a country member - yes, I'm sure you remember (phew, it's hard work pinching gags) - 555
Matthias - November 16, 2009 - Report this comment
This one still shines with all of it's Beaver Dam glory!
Melanie Lee - November 16, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Ah, funk it, this was a bad-ash spoof! Very clever. Sometimes hard to follow, though. Good laughs. 555
Below Average Dave - November 16, 2009 - Report this comment
See above
Red Ant - November 16, 2009 - Report this comment
See above (still love "Snatch a box lunch"!).
NorCALvotress - November 17, 2009 - Report this comment
Lord Agree: ~ P U N ~ O N ~ Sir !
Blaydeman - June 12, 2013 - Report this comment
(Artistry) One of the most clever parodies I've every read! So many fun subs and wordplay, I thought it was hilarious. However, the thing about having so much wordplay in one song is that in some lines the emphasis on certain syllables don't match up quite as well. Technically the syllable count is correct, but it makes it difficult to sing along with. Really funny, but some lines didn't really scan well.
Rex - June 15, 2013 - Report this comment
My, aren't you the cunning linguist. As W.C. Fields would say, "Godfrey Daniel!" Fun read.
Max Power - June 15, 2013 - Report this comment
Punny parody.
bobpiecheese - June 16, 2013 - Report this comment
(Artistry) See above...again!

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