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Song Parodies -> "Crap Lunch"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Crap Lunch"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Middle school cafeteria... I think Jon will like this!
Oh oh oh oh oh

Everyday I hate standing in this line
Wish I could merely fast
Wonder what slop they'll serve this time
Want my money back 'cause it comes up big time
And then the janitor's back fast

Oh crap
Mom won't pack a lunch and that's unfair
Cafeteria food is gross, she's not aware
Just taking a look at it and I get scared
Doesn't anybody care?
What bacteria is lurking in there?
Meat scares...

Crap lunch, got no lunchbox
Gonna throw up, gonna throw up
No PBnJ with crusts cut off
No juice
Crap lunch, no fast food lunch
Gonna throw up, gonna throw up
No dessert with a whipped top
Just gruel

It's sad
Daily crap lunch gone wrong
It's bad, so bad

Ate bad seeds, ate the expired, ate still-froze
What's in the meatloaf no one knows
What is served is where fungus grows
Oh, the hygiene woes
Rats scurry near the server's toes
Off to the commode!


Hug a toilet bowl

Another crap lunch gone wrong
No good, you know
Another crap lunch, but the line is long
Another crap lunch, take the dare
Another crap lunch not from home
Another crap lunch, wasn't spared
Sloppy Joe looks so diarrhea strong
Another crap lunch, so beware
Another crap lunch, greasy chicken bones
Another crap lunch, what's in there?
Server doesn't care
got greasy hair, gives me a stare...


Eat the fish? No, no!
Mercury's least of your cares
Jello looks like Spotted Dick, I swear!
Add the flies and loose hairs in there
Lunchtime nightmares
And yet nobody cares


Can you help me?
Fix a sandwich, add Doritos
Can you help me?
Pack Yogurt and a burrito
Can you help me?
(Brown bag lunch to go)
Leftover pasta in a plastic bowl
Can you help me?
(Even cookies like Oreos)
You say you can't, but you could though
Can you help me?
(Bag of goodies I can stow)
Diet Pepsi and some casserole?


Can u help me?
Leftover turkey and hard rolls
Can u help me?
A small milk and some cereal
Can u help me?
Slice of pizza- even cold
Can u help me?
Cafeteria food is growing mold!!!
Note: Jon gives me inspiration to write food parodies, because of his!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   9

User Comments

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Jonathan - October 27, 2016 - Report this comment
Hey Rob, sorry I missed this one before, nice use of a (in my opinion) pretty lousy OS. 5s. also, thanks for the shout-out! glad my food-parodies inspire yours! :) to tell the truth, MY food-parodies are inspired by the one, the only, KING of food parodies (and parodies in general) "Weird Al" Yankovic! so let us both take a moment to give thanks to the great weirdo known as Al! :)
Rob Arndt - October 27, 2016 - Report this comment
Thanks Jon, now what's our next food target?

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