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Song Parodies -> "Theo Galavan Broke Free"

Original Song Title:

"Jesus He Knows Me"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Genesis

Parody Song Title:

"Theo Galavan Broke Free"

Parody Written by:

Scotty Dangerously

The Lyrics

This is another musical tribute to Gotham, and it takes place in the episode “The Son of Gotham” (Season 2 Episode 10). The song parody is about where Jim Gordon is being held hostage by Theo Galavan and some bad police officers at the Gotham docks, after Galavan is ridiculously released from jail by the judge. Galavan gets released, because Mayor James lies in court that Galavan did not kidnap him. Mayor James lies that it was Oswald Cobblepot, who did the kidnapping. This song parody is a view from Jim Gordon. WARNING: Watch out for spoilers.
(As the music begins, the judge frees Theo Galavan from the police custody, and Jim Gordon punches him. Then, Theo and the officers kidnap Jim. As the bad guys tie Jim up at the docks, Jim breaks into song.)

I see the man who left the courtroom
He just came and dragged me away
His name’s Theo Galavan
That man broke free

I am shocked, and I feel really doomed
All because of Mayor James’ lies
About the stupid kidnapping
Just to set Theo free

I wish I could just break the chains
That Theo really put on me
No way that Theo will be mayor
Of Gotham City

That Theo he broke free
When he had no right
And that Theo’s gonna pay for his crimes
Oh no he’s got me
All tied up tonight
He's very mad at me
And wants me dead tonight

I remember how Barbara Kean
Dressed up as a bride and tried to kill me
She held me hostage at the Gotham church
During that one horrible night

Theo was such a fraud
Sending Kean to kill me
Then, I sent Theo straight to prison
To defend my rights

I think the judge should’ve sent Theo
Straight to the electric chair
But I think the judge and jury trial
Were not being fair

That Theo he broke free
It makes me uptight
And that Theo’s wasting all of my time
Oh no he’s got me
Imprisoned tonight
But I will soon break free
And save Gotham tonight

Galavan told me that his family
Are bonded to monks who are not nice
He said those monks kill to cleanse Gotham of deadly sins
And how it’s the Sacred Order’s sacrifice
I’ve been feeling Deja Vu
That those bad monks claim to know some Kung Fu

I’m feeling so messed up
By Theo’s craziness
But I will live to see
The next day

Theo is such an evil crook
With bad police officers
But there is really no way in hell
They will kill me away

Somebody please rescue me
From Theo Galavan’s kidnapping
All they ever do is make me sick
Just like a bunch of bat droppings

That Theo he broke free
And he’s such a fright
And that Theo’s such a dumb hunk of slime
Oh no he’s got me
It doesn’t feel right
But I wish G.P.D.
Would show up here tonight

That Theo he broke free
But he’ll pay tonight
Oh no, he broke free
And it’s just not right
Those crimes will cost that Theo every dime
And someone will save me
From Theo and his small gang tonight
Tonight

Theo he broke free
Theo he broke free, he broke....

(As the music finishes, Theo Galavan unties Jim Gordon from the chains and leaves the two bad police officers to beat up Jim. Then, Oswald Cobblepot and his henchman shoot the officers to rescue Jim Gordon.)

***Oswald Cobblepot*** (shouting at the unconscious Jim) :

Where is Galavan? Answer me!

(Meanwhile, Galavan sneaks up on young Bruce Wayne in Alfred Pennyworth’s mansion.)

***Theo Galavan*** (Pointing a knife at Bruce):

Well, well, well, if it isn’t little Brucey. You weren’t expecting Alfred, were you?
This definitely has been another tough Gotham song parody for me to write. Just like Weird Al, I take my time to make every chorus different, instead of just having it repeat itself. Galavan may not be the name included in the main title of my mixed double-album parody or mixed album parody trilogy about Gotham. However, this Gotham musical still will be based on “Rise of the VIllains” and I will come up with the best main title possible. Btw, I’ve written five Gotham song parodies so far. I have a lot more to go, and the musical will be completed sometime after the end of the “Rise of the Villains” season.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

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